A Matter of Perspective
by snapesgirl21
Summary: When Stephanie and Morelli realize they don't have a future together, Stephanie embraces the need to grow up and move on with her life. Can moving on with her life include loving Ranger, or will fear keep them apart? Comes after Notorious Nineteen.
1. The Wedding March

_A/N: I don't make any sort of profit. All characters and recognizable material belongs to Janet Evanovich. _

"Why would I want to be in your cousin's wedding?"

"Because the bridesmaid I was supposed to escort down the aisle broke her leg, and Sophia thought you would be a good replacement."

Joe's cousin, Sophia Morelli, was marrying Tommy Mangiacavallo in two days and her college roommate, Jackie Lewis, had broken her leg while trying to do a sexy pole dance at the bachelorette party.

"But the dress probably won't fit me, and I bet it's hideous," I said, trying to figure out how many excuses I could come up with to get out of being in this wedding.

Morelli walked over to the closet by his front door and pulled out a black dress bag.

"Sophia sent the dress over and said to try it on. If it needs adjustments, the seamstress has said she can squeeze you in today or tomorrow," he said, handing me the bag.

I groaned loudly and took the bag from him. This was going to be a disaster. Not only would I have to see Morelli's crazy grandma Bella, but I'd have to do it in an ugly dress. This was the second wedding in three months in which I was placed into the wedding party at the last minute. I had been named maid of honor at the wedding of Ranger's friend Kinsey and his wife Amanda, and had been made to wear a horrid pink taffeta dress with a hideous bow, only to have them elope right before the wedding. I didn't think I was going to get so lucky that Sophia and Tommy would elope before Saturday.

I stomped out of the room and upstairs to Morelli's bedroom to try on the stupid dress. I hoped it was canary yellow and so small that there would be no possible way for it to be altered to fit me. I closed my eyes as I unzipped the bag and pulled the dress out. Opening one eye, my mouth fell open at the sight.

It was a gorgeous black halter dress in satin. I was mesmerized as I stripped out of my t-shirt, bra and jeans, and dropped the dress over my head. I hooked the clasp behind my neck and adjusted it so my boobs weren't popping out. The dress skimmed the floor and felt dreamy as it moved against my bare legs. I walked over to the mirror in the corner of the room and gasped. The dress was perfect. It fit me as though it were tailored for me originally, and made me look almost elegant.

"Steph, how's it going?" Morelli asked, knocking on the door.

"You can come in," I said, not able to take my eyes off my reflection.

I saw Morelli walk through the door and stop, seeing my reflection in the mirror.

"Wow, Cupcake. You look great."

I had to agree.

"Ok, I'll be in the wedding," I told him. "Just so I can wear this dress. I've never seen such a great bridesmaid dress."

Morelli shook his head and picked up his phone to give Sophia the good news while I kept staring at myself in the mirror. I was going to be a modern-day Narcissus if someone didn't drag me away soon.

The rehearsal took place the next day at the same Catholic Church in the Burg that my family attended and that I had gone to for Kinsey and Amanda's wedding a few months ago. I had put on a blue dress that I wore for family occasions, and pulled my hair back in a clip. I was dreading seeing Bella, but figured the sooner the rehearsal was over with, the sooner we could get through dinner and get away. She would be more occupied tomorrow at the actual wedding, leaving me to enjoy my perfect dress and wedding cake in relative peace.

I was the bridesmaid immediately before the maid of honor, so I gathered in the back of the church with Sophia, Joe's sister Lucia, and two other women I didn't know. Lucia was the maid of honor, and I lined up in front of her and behind the two nameless women who kept glaring at me, as though I'd stolen their spot in the bridal hierarchy.

We started the wedding march down the aisle and I locked eyes with Morelli. I was reminded of when I had down this same walk in the other wedding, only headed towards Ranger, who was the best man. At that wedding, I'd had a moment of imagining myself walking down the aisle to marry Ranger, and it had been surprisingly pleasant. I'd struggled not to let a tear fall as I became overwhelmed with the emotion of getting married to Ranger. Looking down the aisle now at Morelli, I tried to picture the same situation with him.

But as hard as I tried, I couldn't find the same image or emotion in the idea of walking down this aisle to marry Morelli. I started to feel cold and clamy and couldn't picture a blissful wedding. I all I could see where the fights that would ensue afterwards, which would span from me quitting my job as a bounter hunter to stay home and pop out babies to staying away from Ranger all together. I felt like I had been kicked in the gut by the time I reached the altar. Morelli and I had been in an off-and-on, semi-exclusive relationship for more years than I cared to think about. We had danced around the idea of marriage, not sure if we could bring ourselves to commit to it or each other. We'd been briefly engaged, mainly to get my family off my back, but there had not been any actual plans to get married. We'd lived together before, but those times usually fell apart when one or both of us thought the other was being unreasonable about something.

I gazed back to Morelli, whose expression was serious, but distracted. I wonder if he had been having some of the same "what if" scenarios running through his head as I walked down the aisle, though I had no idea if they were as horrifying as the ones I had. The priest and couple did a quick pretend walk through of the ceremony then we all proceeded down the aisle for the processional. I grasped Morelli's arm and we walked down behind the best man and maid of honor in silence, avoiding each other's gaze. The awkwardness carried over to the dinner afterwards at Gioia, a new Italian restaurant located just outside the Burg. I tried to ignore it, engaging in conversation with Lucia, who was my age and had been in my class in high school, but it felt like an elephant in the room, though no one else seemed to notice.

Once dinner was over and Bella had threatened me with the eye if I made her grandson late for the wedding tomorrow because I was "being a slut", Morelli and I got into his new blue Explorer and drove back to his house. By the time we pulled up in front of the house, I was cracking my knuckles out of nerves. I didn't know how to handle the situation at the church. Morelli was clearly having some thoughts on the matter as well, so I didn't think I'd be able to ignore it.

Morelli turned off the car, but made no move to get out. I had unbuckled my seatbelt, but stopped short of opening my door, realizing he wasn't moving.

"What's going on with us?" He asked, picking at a spot on his steering wheel.

I swallowed, feeling a lump forming in my throat. "What do you mean?"

Morelli blew out a sigh. "At the church, when you were walking down the aisle towards me, could you picture us getting married?"

So Morelli's mind had gone to the same place as mine.

I bit down on my lower lip, unsure of how to answer the question. To say "No" seemed a bit rude, but I didn't want to lie either.

"I tried," I said, hoping that answer would suffice, and knowing full well that it wouldn't.

Morelli nodded. "Me too. But all I ended up imaging was us fighting about your job, having kids and you staying away from Ranger."

My eyes widened at this pronouncement. Geez, we'd been on the exact same wavelength.

A quiet "Yeah" was all I finally offered.

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, Morelli running his index finger along his upper lip and me nervously jiggling my foot. My mind was running the gambit from break up to elope, wondering if one of them was the right answer, or if we should just keep living in the moment the way we had been.

Morelli finally broke the silence. "I've been wondering about this for while. I've been hoping for some sign that would tell me if I was supposed to marry you, or if we needed to give it a clean break once and for all. Last week, the head of the Gang Reduction Task Force with the State Police called me, offering me a job down in Camden. I told him I'd need a little time to decide, and was wondering what it meant for us. I didn't know if it meant we needed to break up and I move down to Camden to allow each of us a fresh start, or if we were supposed to get married and move to Camden together. I think tonight's trip down the aisle finally showed me which direction we're supposed to head in."

I was stunned.

"And that is?" I asked, trying to keep my voice level. I knew I was going to be feel miserable no matter which answer he gave me.

"I need to take the job in Camden, and we both need to move on with our lives."

Despite the tears stinging my eyes and a giant lump in my throat, I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Morelli was right. We did love each other, but it was painfully obvious that it would never be enough, and we would only be hurting ourselves by going down this road any longer.

Tears began falling down my cheeks as I stared out the window, watching a man walking his dog cross the street and go into an open garage. I felt Morelli reach over and pat my hand, and I turned to look at him. He had tears in his eyes too. I reached across the console and gave hugged him, knowing we'd reached a moment years in the making. We stayed like that for a minute before pulling apart and wiping our eyes.

I blew out a shaky sigh before I spoke. "Let's not tell anyone until after the wedding is over. We don't want to take any focus off of Sophia and Tommy."

Morelli cleared his throat and nodded. "Yeah. Good idea."

We got out of the car and went inside his house, Bob rushing over to greet us with his normal exuberance. I had been planning to spend the night at Morelli's, get ready for the wedding and we'd ride over together to the church the next afternoon. Now, I didn't think that was such a good idea.

"Look, I'll get the dress and my stuff and go back to my apartment tonight. You can pick me up on the way to the church," I said, heading towards the stairs. Morelli nodded, and walked into the kitchen.

"Do you want a beer?" he asked, opening the refrigerator.

"No thanks. I won't be long."

I went upstairs and grabbed the dress bag out of Morelli's closet and then headed over to the drawer where I kept a couple of changes of panties and socks and emptied the contents into my shoulder bag. I moved onto the bathroom, where I grabbed my toothbrush, hair dryer, make-up, shampoo and conditioner and deodorant, stuffing them into the bag as well. I didn't keep much at Morelli's, so it only took me about five minutes to be certain I had everything.

I went back downstairs to find Morelli drinking his beer standing up at the kitchen counter. He gazed at my overflowing bag, understanding that I had packed up all of my possessions that had found a temporary home at his house. We didn't speak for a minute, but continued to awkwardly glance at each other off and on. Finally, Morelli finished the last of his beer and put the bottle in the recycling.

"I'll pick you up around three tomorrow."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak in case I started sobbing.

Without saying good-bye, I headed out the front door and laid the dress down flat in the back seat of the ten year old Camry I'd bought a month ago. I put my shoulder bag in the passenger seat and got in the car. Years of driving on the Jersey freeway and perfect knowledge of Burg streets were the only things that allowed me to make it back to my apartment in one piece. My eyes had been so blurry with tears on the ride home, I could barely distinguish between red and green stoplights. I thankfully met none of my neighbors in the lobby or elevator of my building, and got myself inside my apartment before the gasping sobs started. I knew I wasn't devastated over the break up, but I was sad and confused. Morelli had been a part of my life as long as I could remember, and after the wedding tomorrow, I had no idea as to how much I may see him in the future. I felt like I was grieving the death of a friend, and in reality I was. I was grieving the loss of a relationship in which I had invested time and emotion. I was also losing a friend. I let myself cry until I couldn't anymore. I hung up the bridesmaid dress, gave Rex a carrot and fresh water and fell into bed with my clothes on.

I would face tomorrow when it came.


	2. Better in Time

_A/N: Thanks for all of the wonderful responses I've had to this story! I've only recently gotten into Plum fanfiction, though I've been a fan of the books for years. _

I slept until noon the next day, waking up with puffy eyes and hair from hell. I ate half a box of Tastykakes before heading to the shower, where I didn't let myself cry anymore to avoid making my eyes any more puffy before the wedding. I pulled my hair up into a twist at the back of my head, used concealer on my dark circles, and put on the dress. I found a pair of strappy black heels in the closet and put them on. I admired the dress in the mirror, but found I wasn't as delighted with it as I had been two days ago.

I had been pacing the floor for fifteen minutes, not wanting to sit and wrinkle the dress, when Morelli knocked on my door. I opened it to find him dressed in his tuxedo, looking as tired as I felt, but otherwise, he his normal sexy self.

I grabbed my little black purse, locked up my apartment and headed towards the elevator next to Morelli. We rode in silence to the ground floor, and walked out to his Explorer.

The wedding was starting at three-thirty, so we would be there in time to get situated for the ceremony, do last minute make-up and hair checks, and line up to walk down the aisle. I spent most of the time during the ceremony zoned out, only paying attention to when the priest would indicate it was time to pray and when the processional music started. I plastered a phony smile on my face as I walked down the aisle on Morelli's arm, noticing he did the same thing.

The reception was at the VFW hall so on the ride over I asked Morelli when he was going to break the news of his leaving to everyone.

"I called the head of the Gang unit today and told him I'd take the job. I'm supposed to start two weeks from Monday. I'll tell my family tomorrow and give notice at the station on Monday."

I nodded. The Burg gossip line would likely reach my mother and grandmother before me, so I'd let someone else break the news to them, confirming we were over and that I wasn't following him to Camden when they asked.

Once at the reception it was a little easier to act normal, as people were drinking and eating, toasts were being made and laughter ensued. I was on my third piece of wedding cake when Morelli came up to me.

"What do you say to one last dance, Cupcake?" he asked, holding out his hand.

I put down the rest of my cake and took his hand, walking to the middle of the dance floor. The DJ had just started playing Leona Lewis's "Better in Time" and I found myself struggling not to burst into tears again. The reality of the true ending to my relationship with Morelli was hitting hard, but I beginning to suspect things would be a little easier once he was away in Camden. Or that was the hope, at least.

The party wasn't showing any sign of stopping by eight that evening, so I asked Morelli to take me home, but to come back to the reception if he wanted. He shook his head, saying he was tired and wanted to turn in early anyway. When we got to my lot, I told him he didn't need to walk me up. He put the car in park and turned to face me.

"I'm going to head out to Camden next Monday to find a place to live and start getting settled before I have to start work the next week," he said. "In case you want to come over and say good-bye to Bob."

I shook my head. "I think I'd better not. Just give him a hug from me and tell him not to destroy stuff in the new house."

Tears started falling down my cheeks again, knowing this was going to be our good-bye.

Morelli tipped my chin up and kissed me. It wasn't a passionate kiss, it didn't involve any tongue or wandering hands, but it told me everything I needed to know. He loved me, he always would to some extent, but that this was the end.

We broke apart, and I wiped my cheeks. "Good luck, Joe. I hope you find someone who can be what you need them to be. I want you to be happy."

Morelli nodded. "Thanks, Steph. I want you to be happy too, but I don't think you'll have to look far for that."

I let out a humorless laugh. "If you're talking about Ranger, you're wrong. He's made it clear over the years that he's not the marrying type."

"But you love him, don't you?"

I whipped my head around quickly. I'd figured Morelli knew the attraction was there, but never knew if he suspected deeper feelings.

"I've known since Scrog kidnapped you and he got shot in your apartment. You were a mess that had little to do with being kidnapped and held at gun point, and more with the fact that Ranger had been bleeding out," he told me, patting my hand. "I never said anything because I knew it would just lead to a fight, but I can tell he loves you. Maybe things will work out for you guys once I'm out of the picture for good."

I couldn't find anything to say, so I put my hand on the door handle. "Bye, Joe. See ya around."

"Bye, Stephanie."

I got out of the Explorer and walked into my building without looking back. I took the stairs rather than waiting for the elevator, and went inside my apartment feeling slightly sick and exhausted, but resolved not to spend another evening crying. I changed out of the dress and into my sweats, washed off my make-up and pulled my hair back in a ponytail. I flopped down on my couch and surfed my three-hundred channels, not finding anything worth watching. I popped Die Hard into the DVD player and fell asleep when Hans Gruber busted out his American accent.

The sound of my cell phone ringing woke up me up the next morning. I had a stiff neck from falling asleep on my couch, and had to run to the bathroom to pee from all of the champagne I drank at the reception. Once I had finished my business in the bathroom, I checked my phone. The clock told me it was half past eleven in the morning, and that I'd had seven missed calls, four voicemails and two text messages.

The first call had been from my mother, asking if I'd heard that Joe was moving to Camden and was I going with him. The second was from Grandma Mazur, saying she'd heard from Mrs. Wolchek at Mass that Bella was going around telling everyone she'd put the eye on me, which is why Joe had found me unattractive and dumped me. The third message from Connie, saying she'd heard about Joe and asked if we had broken up, or if I was going with him. The fourth message was my mother again, telling me that she was making fried chicken and pineapple-upside down cake for dinner and that she'd set a place for me. One text message was from Joe, saying he'd make it clear to people that Bella didn't put the eye on me and that we'd broken up amicably. The second was from Lula, saying she was bringing me sympathy donuts and a Big Gulp.

I had just read the text from Lula when there was a knock at the door. I looked out the peep hole and saw Lula.

"Hey, I just saw your text," I told her, opening the door and standing to the side to let her come in. I shut the door and took one of the drinks and a bag of donuts from her.

"So it's true? Morelli dumped you and is going to live in Camden?"

"Well, he didn't dump me. We agreed about the break up. But yes, he's moving to Camden to work for the State Police Gang Unit."

Lula opened her bag of donuts and pulled out a Boston Crème. "Hunh. Why did you break up? Did he expect you to move with him?"

I shook my head as I bit into a jelly donut. "No, we just realized our relationship wasn't going anywhere and that it was better to make a clean break, once and for all. It was very amicable. We don't hate each other."

"Are you gonna start dating Ranger now?" Lula asked, dabbing at a spot on her shirt where crème had landed.

"No," I said, taking a long drag of soda. "Ranger doesn't date, or have relationships. I'm just going to stay single until I meet someone I'm really interested in, or die an old maid."

Lula snorted. "But you're interested in Ranger, aren't you?"

"Yes, but he's not an option."

"You could try to change his mind."

I rolled my eyes. "Let it go. It's not going to happen, and I'm not going to even get my hopes up imagining for second it would."

Lula kept quiet after that and we finished our donuts in peace. She left around one, saying she needed to go shopping for some shoes for a hot date she had that night. I declined shoe shopping, saying I needed to clean the apartment and take a shower before I went to dinner at my parents. I didn't want to see my family. They would be giving me pitying expressions, knowing how many years and Friday dinners I had invested in Morelli, only to end up alone. But I would go anyway, face the music of my mother reminding me that I wasn't getting any younger and that she didn't want worry about me being alone in this world when she and my dad were no longer around, and start the process of moving on with my life.

I kept my thoughts well away from Ranger for the moment. My feelings for him confused me much of the time, so I knew I needed to stay focused on the situation at hand. He was out of town at the moment anyway, having left last week to spend some time at his other offices. He and a business partner had equal stakes in each branch of Rangeman and spent time in each office, but Ranger's main base of operations was Trenton and he spent a good deal of time in contact with the Miami office, since he had family in Miami. His business partner lived in Atlanta, but divided his time between that branch and Boston. Ranger and his partner had agreed that neither wanted to keep bouncing around the four different branches all the time, preferring to be in on the action, not running a corporation. Ranger was keeping the Trenton and Miami offices, and his partner was taking the Boston and Atlanta offices. He said he'd be gone about two weeks while the lawyers and accountants settled everything, telling me to call Tank if I needed anything. I naturally hadn't enlisted Tank's assistance for anything, since I knew he hated trying to keep track of me while Ranger was away. The men at his office preferred death to telling Ranger they'd lost me.

I pulled in front of my parents' house at five minutes to six. I blew out a sigh and got out of the car, watching as Grandma Mazur opened the front door. Dinner had been as I predicted. My mom kept telling me that she should have known Joseph Morelli wouldn't settle down, and hated that I had wasted my time on him. I told her that we had a mutual break-up and reassured Grandma that Bella did not put the eye on me. My dad stayed quiet on the matter, only speaking when he needed more chicken. I left an hour later, having helped clear the table and packed a doggy-bag with chicken and cake. Morelli and I had broken up before, and it took a while to get used to it, but I knew I would adjust once more. I just had to give it time.

The next week passed in a bit of a blur. There were only three FTAs, all of which were low bonds. The Camry had survived the week, thankfully, as I hadn't made enough off those three skips to pay for rent, groceries and a new car. Word had spread through the Burg like wildfire about Morelli's moving and our permanent break-up. I'd fielded calls from my best friend Mary Lou, along with three girls I'd gone to high school with, but hadn't talk to in several years. I did end up going to say goodbye to Bob while Morelli was at work on Friday. I realized I still had a copy of his house key, which he would need to give the realtor who would be selling the house. I had given Bob a hug, told him to be a good boy and that I loved him. I left Morelli a note that I had remembered having his house key, and put both the note and key on his kitchen counter. I locked the door behind me as I left the house, and got in my car and drove to the bond's office. It was almost four in the afternoon, so if anyone had skipped out on their court appearance today, Connie would have the files ready for me. I hoped she had something, as I really wanted a distraction, and really needed the money.

"We have one FTA, but it's a million dollar bond, which we normally give to Ranger," Connie told me when I walked in.

"Let me give it a try," I pleaded. Ten percent of a million dollar bond would leave me in a really good place. I'd always felt it was a little unfair for Ranger to always get the big paydays.

Connie hesitated for a moment, but handed me the file. "I'll give you until Monday. Ranger is supposed to be back by then. If you don't have him by then, I'll pass it on to Ranger. Vinnie would have my head if he knew I was giving this to you, but he's out in Idaho picking up Charles Duke, and won't be back until Wednesday."

I took the file from Connie and went out to my car to read it. Leo Dumati was a fifty year-old former gardener. He had married his boss, Julia Thompson-Dewitt last year. Julia was an heiress of the Thompson-Dewitt Diamond Mines in northern Canada, and was reportedly worth more than half a billion dollars. The marriage had been a scandal in the upper class social circles, as everyone felt Dumati was simply seducing Julia for her money. Julia had been found dead three months ago in their swimming pool. Toxicology screens showed large amounts of sleeping pills in her system, and a search in the house had found residue of the pills in her glass of wine. A trip to her lawyer found that she'd left her entire fortune to her new husband, Leo. Dumati had been arrested for her murder, and because he had no criminal history, was released on a one million dollar bond, which Vinnie had signed because of the notoriety of the situation. I took note of Dumati's address in Trenton's most expensive neighborhood of Pike Point and drove in that direction. It was going to be hard to hide in my Camry in Dumati's neighborhood, as no one ever parked on the streets and the driveways were about a mile long, but I was going to give it the old college try.

Ten minutes later, I pulled into the drive and started digging the pepper spray, cuffs and Mag light out of my purse. My stun gun had a dead battery, and my gun was in the cookie jar at home. I didn't have any bullets, so bringing it would have been pointless. I put the cuffs in my back pocket and the pepper spray in the front. I stuffed the Mag light in the back of my waistband of my jeans, to keep it hidden, but within easy reach if necessary. I walked up to the red brick house and rang the door bell, which sounded like the church bells at St. Patrick's Cathedral. A minute later, a man with brown hair and green eyes answered the door. I knew from the mug shot in the file that it was Leo Dumati.

"I'm not answering any questions," Dumati said, trying to shut the door in my face.

I stuck my foot in the door. "Leo Dumati, I'm Stephanie Plum from your bail bonds office. You missed your court date."

Dumati shook his head. "No I didn't. I don't go to court until the nineteenth."

"Today is the nineteenth," I told him.

"No it's not. It's the tenth."

I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and showed him the date on the phone.

Dumati paled. "Oh God. I've been drinking a lot, but I didn't know I'd lost ten days."

While Dumati was lost in thought, I took the opportunity to pull my cuffs out of my back pocket and slapped one on his wrist.

Dumati looked down at the bracelet on his wrist and tried to pull away, but I was too quick for him. I yank on the handcuffs and pulled him completely out of his front door. With my other hand, I pulled out my pepper spray and gave him a face full, which caused him to start yelling. While he was whining about his burning eyes, I cuffed his other wrist and guided him to my car. I buckled him into the passenger side rear seat and shut the door, temporarily drowning out his moans. I got in my car and hit the button on the console that engaged the child locks on the back doors. I had discovered the usefulness of this button the first day after I got the car and vowed that any future cars would have this same feature. I'd had FTAs jump out of the back of my cars before, so I wasn't eager to repeat the experience, especially with my first million dollar bond.

"Why did you have to spray me?" Dumati whined as we made our way to the police station.

"You were resisting arrest," I informed him. It was slightly true. He had pulled away when he saw the cuff on his wrist.

"Did not," he shot back.

"What are you, five years-old?" I asked, looking in the mirror. "We'll take you to the jail and you can see if you can get rebonded." I thought it doubtful, considering his charges, but Vinnie had enjoyed the exposure from the media, so he might sign for Dumati a second time, if the judge allowed him to get bailed out again.

I walked Dumati into the police station and received a smattering of applause from the three uniforms in the bay. Once I'd handed Dumati over to check-in and gotten by body receipt, I called Connie and told her to wait for me at the office so she could cut me a check. I wasn't interested in holding onto a body receipt worth one-hundred thousand dollars overnight

"I can't believe you got him in less than an hour," Connie said, handing me the check.

"I'm in a no-nonsense kind of mood today," I told her, kissing my check and bounding out the door. The bank was across the street, so I hurried over and made it to the door just as the teller was coming to lock up. After five minutes of coaxing and showing her my large check, she allowed me in and deposited the check into my account, telling me that there would be a three business day hold on the check to be sure it cleared. Just knowing the money was in my account was enough, so I could wait a couple of days before hitting the ATM.

I was halfway back to my apartment before reality set in: I had just earned in one capture what it had taken me three years to earn doing numerous small skips. Kelly Clarkson was singing about being stronger on the radio, so I cranked up the music and sang along, not caring who heard me because I had a hundred thousand dollars in the bank. By the time I made it home, I had tentatively calculated how much of the money I could actually keep and how much would have to go to Uncle Sam for taxes. I still had enough money left over to buy myself a new car, pay my rent for the rest of the year and buy food, clothes and get highlights.

I walked into my apartment, still singing Kelly Clarkson's song when I realized Ranger was sitting on my sofa.

"Don't quit your day job, babe," he said.

I rolled my eyes. "I thought you weren't getting back until Monday. And besides, I just kicked ass at my day job, so I don't plan to quit anytime soon." I told him about Dumati, which earned me a full-on Ranger smile.

"Nice. And you didn't blow up a car or fall into a dumpster."

I stuck my tongue out at him. "You never answered my question. What brings you back early?"

Ranger stood and walked into my kitchen, opening the refrigerator and pulling out two beers. "My lawyers are faster than I thought they'd be."

We returned to the sofa and nursed our beers.

"I heard Morelli is leaving the Trenton PD to go work for the State in Camden," Ranger said, putting his beer on the table. "Are you going with him?"

I was surprised at Ranger's question. He wasn't usually so apparent in wanting to know something, but would get the truth out of you subtly. I shook my head, not meeting Ranger's gaze, but looking down at my shoes.

"No. We realized that our relationship was headed nowhere, so he decided to take the job, and we've gone our separate ways permanently."

Ranger didn't say anything for a minute, but picked up his beer and took another drink.

"Are you ok with this?" he asked.

I shrugged. "It is what it is. We both realized we wouldn't be getting married last week at his cousin's wedding rehearsal. When I was walking down the aisle with the bridal party, and he was standing with the groomsmen, neither of us could picture us getting married, but only fights about my job, having kids and staying away from—," I stopped at that point, not wanting him to know about Morelli's insight on my relationship with Ranger.

"Anyway, it was a real awakening, and something that needed to happen," I finished, drinking the rest of my beer.

I could feel Ranger's eyes on me, but didn't want to turn to look at him. I was afraid if I saw that smoldering expression of his, I'd end up sleeping with him. Not that I didn't want to sleep with him, but I didn't want to go running to him simply because Morelli wasn't in the picture any longer. Ranger had always told me marriage wasn't in the cards for him, so I knew any relationship with him would have limits that I most likely couldn't handle.

I felt a hand on my chin, and Ranger guided my face over so that I was looking at him. He didn't have the sexy look on his face, thank God, but it was an expression that I hadn't seen too many times. It told me he was opening himself up to me in a way that he normally didn't.

"What had you been thinking about when you were walking down the aisle at Kinsey and Amanda's rehearsal? You nearly caused a pile up by the time you reached the altar."

If I was going to tell Ranger the truth, I'd need a least another beer, if not two more.

"I need another beer, do you want one?" I asked, trying to get up, but Ranger pulled me back down.

He kept staring at me, not saying anything. I bit down on my bottom lip. Ranger would know if I lied to him, but I also don't know that the truth would do us any favors.

"I tried to imagine what it would be like to be marrying you," I told him. It was the truth, but an abridged version.

"And could you imagine it?"

"Maybe, but it doesn't really matter."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Why doesn't it matter? You don't want to marry me?"

I rolled my eyes. "It doesn't matter if I could imagine marrying you, or if I wanted to marry you because you've made it clear that you aren't interested in a relationship involving a ring."

Ranger ran a finger along my cheek, making my nipples go hard. "You're discounting me that easily?"

I pulled Ranger's hand off of my face. "No, I'm just going off of what you've beaten in my brain over the past five years. I can't keep doing whatever it is that we've been doing, Ranger. I need to move on with my life, and maybe I'll find someone who loves me and isn't so afraid of commitment."

I saw a flash in Ranger's eyes that was foreign. What was it? It was hard for me to believe I could have hurt his feelings.

"So what you're telling me is that unless I want to be in a romantic relationship with you, you don't want me around," Ranger said, his voice reaching what I considered his deadly calm mode. I'd only ever heard him in that way when he was really burying his feelings.

"I'm not trying to give you an ultimatum. I can be your friend and sometimes colleague, but I can't just have sex with you, have you giving me cars and protection, but keeping your emotions closed off. I want to be your friend, I would like to be more, but I know it won't happen. I just want you to understand that I'm setting up the limits. No sex if we are just going to be friends. It makes things too confusing for me."

I knew I was rambling, and wondered if I made any sort of sense, but I had put it out there for him.

Ranger studied me for a minute before speaking.

"You need to think about whether you really want a relationship with me, Stephanie. I have a lot of shit in my past that you don't know about, and many things I can't tell you. Think about that then tell me if you really want me. Because if you still do, then I'm all yours."

With that, Ranger got up and left the apartment, leaving me sitting on the couch with my jaw hitting the floor.


	3. Movin' On Up

A/N: You all have been such wonderful readers, and I've appreciated all of your reviews. My gift to you all: another chapter as I head to bed.

I lay awake in bed all night after Ranger's startling announcement. I knew Ranger had lots of secrets. He'd been Special Forces in the military, so it's likely he would have done things that would be considered questionable or even illegal by world courts. I also knew he tended to operate within gray areas of the law, sometimes disregarding it all together. He was still very much a mystery to me, even after all of these years, but I knew his character. I also knew he had money, was great in bed, and ate like a rabbit. His energy was quiet and contained, but overpowered mine when we were in close quarters. But I also suspected he wouldn't open up to me in the ways I wanted him to.

When I was still awake at sunrise, I got up and started getting ready for the day. I wasn't really sure what I was going to do, but I knew I couldn't just sit around my apartment all day. I didn't have any outstanding skips, but I'd stop by the bonds office anyway to visit with Connie and Lula. It was Saturday, so the office was only open half day. I gave Rex some celery and asked him what he thought about whether I should seriously pursue a relationship with Ranger. He didn't respond, so I locked up and went down to my Camry and headed to the bakery, where I got an assortment of donuts and coffees. I arrived at the bond's office at the same time as Connie.

"Wow, I don't think I've ever seen you this early in the morning," Connie said, unlocking the office and turning off the alarm. "And you're dressed, your hair pulled up and you're wearing mascara. What's going on?"

I shrugged and put the donuts down on her desk. "I just decided to get an early start. Is that a crime?"

Connie put her purse in her desk and sat down, turning on her computer. "For you, it practically is. You have bags under your eyes, which makes me think you didn't sleep. Are you upset about Morelli?"

I sighed and plopped into one of the chairs in front of her desk with Boston Crème. "Not really. I mean, I do miss him, and it's sad that we couldn't make it work, but that's not it."

Connie raised an eyebrow and watched me expectantly as she selected a donut and a coffee. I debated about whether to tell Connie about Ranger. I typically didn't like to talk about my romantic relationships with anyone, but I really needed a sounding board. Lula would tell me to go after Ranger because he was hot and had an assortment of cars, so I didn't feel like she was a reliable resource. Connie knew Ranger was hot and rich, but she was also pretty level-headed about grown-up things like relationships.

"Ok, I'll tell you, but please keep it to yourself," I began, grabbing a coffee and checking out the window to see if Lula was pulling up.

"She won't be here for another hour," Connie said, knowing what I was doing.

I bit down on my lip before I finally spoke. "I've been in love with both Morelli and Ranger for a long time now. I've been with Ranger off and on in terms of sex, but never an actual relationship. He's always told me that his lifestyle didn't allow for marriage, so I never counted on him in that aspect. I figured if I got married, it would be to Morelli, but I couldn't get past my feelings for Ranger. Morelli realized it too. He told me the last time I saw him."

Connie chewed her donut, lost in thought. "Does Ranger know you love him? Has he ever told you he loves you?"

I shrugged. "I've never said 'I love you' to him. He's told me he loves me, but tends to qualify it by saying 'in his own way'. He's commented in the past that his love doesn't come with ring."

"So your problem is that you are in love with him and want to be in a relationship, but he doesn't?"

I shook my head and told Connie about the conversation with Ranger in my apartment last night. Connie's eyes grew wide at the end of the story.

"Stephanie, he wants to be in a relationship with you, but he wants to make sure it's what you really want and aren't just rebounding from Morelli. Ranger isn't the type of guy to just change his mind about something like that on a whim, and I don't think he'd change his mind on it for anyone but you," Connie said.

"Do you think his secrets are really bad?" I asked, nearly rolling my eyes at myself for asking such an obvious question.

"I think he probably had to do some things while he was in the Army that he wouldn't want to talk about, and he doesn't always mesh with the law these days, but he's a good man overall. Are you worried about it?"

I thought about it for a minute. "It's not that I'm worried about his secrets. I guess I'm more concerned about how our relationship would go. He's so closed-off emotionally. I wonder if he would ever really open up to me. Would I meet his family, know if he had any imaginary friends growing up, or learn where he really considers his home to be?"

Connie opened her mouth to say something, but stopped as I heard the door to the bonds office open. I turned around to see Ranger walking in, holding some paperwork in his hand.

"We got Manny Rodriguez this morning," he told Connie, handing her a body receipt. "You were right about him seeing Carol Simpkins on the side. We busted him at her house."

Connie smiled as she wrote out a check. "I told you my hairdresser's gossip is golden. She's never been wrong yet."

Ranger gave a small smile as he took the check from Connie. I sat quietly eating my donut, trying not to draw too much attention to myself. Connie and I needed to finish our conversation, and I needed some Ranger-free time to sit and think about a future with him. When I'd asked about the "Batcave" in the past, which is what I consider his real home, he had told me that once you came into the Batcave, it was for forever. I had a feeling that was his take on relationships. I had no doubts about his ability to stay faithful, and in a way I was starting to see why he may have been so resistant about emotional attachments to me with Morelli in the picture. Morelli had barely been able to handle my time with Ranger while we were in a relationship, and I didn't think the reverse would have been accepted if I had been in a relationship with Ranger. I had the feeling that the only reason he was telling me he was open to a relationship at this point was because Morelli was down in Camden, and out of my life for good.

"Babe," came Ranger's voice into my thoughts. I shook myself of out my reverie and realized he and Connie were both staring at me. I had a feeling they'd been trying to get my attention for a while.

"Sorry, did you say something?" I asked, picking up my coffee and taking a long drag.

"I was telling you I needed some help with a client this afternoon," Ranger said. "It's a female client with children. I wanted to get a woman's perspective on a security system, and wondered if you were free to go over to her house."

I threw my empty coffee cup in Connie's trash and stood. "Sure. Are we going now?"

"Yes."

I told Connie bye and that I'd be back later. She understood that I wanted to continue our conversation and gave me a meaningful look as she nodded her head.

Ranger and I climbed into his Turbo and we drove in silence to the house. It was in the same neighborhood as Leo Dumati's house, but two streets over. The house was large and white, with columns and eight-foot windows along the front.

"The owner is out of town right now, so she won't be here for input," Ranger said, pulling a clipboard with paperwork on it and a pen out of the storage area of the Turbo.

We walked around the outside of the house first. Ranger said the owner wanted closed circuit television monitoring, but he wanted to ensure the privacy of her and her teenage daughters. I told him I'd want cameras focused on my front door, the garages and the back door so that I could see who was there, especially if it was late at night. I told him the large windows were vulnerable for a quick and easy break in, so he made a note to hook up the downstairs windows to the system, but I told him that the second floor windows probably wouldn't need it, since you'd have to pull out a ladder to get in and out. I also knew that I liked having the breeze blow in at night, and it would be a pain in the ass if you set off the alarm every time you opened or closed your bedroom window.

We walked through the interior of the house, and I found myself drooling over the master suite. Her closet was as big as my bedroom, her bathroom spacious, modern and sans mildew. It made me think about the one hundred thousand dollars sitting in my bank account. After taxes, I'd still have more than eighty thousand dollars. I could buy a condo or a house, and still have money in the bank. I'd been thinking about getting a new car, but considering my bad luck with cars, it didn't make sense to spend that kind of money, only to have the car destroyed. I could get a place with a bathroom that wasn't brown and orange, where I could install an alarm system, and possibly not every criminal in Trenton would know where I lived any longer. I decided when I got home, I would pull up real estate listings on my computer and give moving some serious thought.

Ranger and I finished our walkthrough and he locked the front door behind us. We got into his Turbo and pulled away, headed back towards the bond's office.

"You don't look like you've slept," Ranger commented as we pulled out of the neighborhood.

I rolled my eyes. "Gee, thanks. You really know how to make a girl feel special."

Ranger said nothing, so I gave it a minute before I gave in. "No, I didn't sleep last night. Some jackass and his mysterious ways kept my mind churning."

Ranger chuckled. "Jackass, huh?"

I didn't comment, but looked out the window at the businesses we were passing.

"Babe, it isn't about you. Don't ever think that it is."

I turned to look at him. "You're saying that all of this hesitancy and resistance is about you, and nothing to do with me or my history with Morelli?"

Ranger nodded. "I told you last night there's a lot of bad stuff in my past. I try to make up for it by helping keep others safe, but there are some demons you can't get rid of. I want you to be sure you understand what you're getting yourself into by wanting to be with me."

We pulled up outside the bond's office, and I unbuckled my seatbelt. "I don't worry about your 'demons', as you call them," I told Ranger as I picked up my purse from between my legs. "I just want you to open up to me. I want to get to know you better, not spend my time with someone who answers a question or makes a comment with a look or "Babe". I can be trusted, you know." I got out of the car before Ranger could respond and went into the office, where Lula was sitting on the couch reading a magazine and Connie was on the phone.

Once Connie was off the phone, I told them about how I was thinking of moving.

"That's good," Lula said, flipping a page in her magazine. "Maybe now you won't be fire bombed every other week."

"Let's pull up the real estate listings online," Connie suggested, bringing up a website for a local realty company.

I gave her my price range and Connie put it in the search. I had a pad of paper and a pen and wrote down the addresses of a few places that interested me. They were in neighborhoods surrounding the Burg, so my next task was to call my cousin, Lacy, who was a realtor.

"Of course I'll help Steph," Lacy had said when I told her. "I'll work on getting you a great place for as cheap as possible. You'd be surprised what lengths people will go to get out of their house."

Lacy agreed to meet me after lunch to start looking at places, and Connie and Lula said they wanted to come too. We closed up the office at noon and went to Pino's for lunch. Connie and Lula split a pizza while I had a meatball sub. Lula went to the bathroom while we were at Pino's, so Connie leaned across the table to ask me if anything happened while Ranger and I were out. I relayed our conversation to her, which made her shake her head.

"He's so worried about things that he's done that I doubt he would ever even tell you about even if he could," Connie said as she pulled cash out of her wallet. "But I guess you would also have to be able to accept the fact that you won't know those things about his life."

The conversation ended again once Lula returned. We paid our bills and went to over to Lacy's office, where she was waiting for us by her car. We piled in and sped off to the first house, which was in Morelli's old neighborhood, but a couple of blocks over. The house was dated, but still newer than my apartment. It had one bedroom, one bath and was empty, as the owners had moved to Florida permanently. The next house was in the neighborhood east of the Burg. It was only a couple of blocks south of Hamilton Avenue and was filled with young professionals and young families. I immediately took a liking to the townhouse. It had two bedrooms, a bathroom upstairs with a powder room downstairs, and nice dark wood floors. We looked at two more houses in neighborhoods surrounding the Burg, but Connie and Lula had fallen in love with the second house the same way I had.

"The fact that you can pay cash will be a big hit," Lacy told me as we made our way back to her office. "I think you should put in a low offer now. We'll say you can pay cash, but of course nothing happens until it's been inspected. We can write up the offer back at my office then I'll let you know what I hear."

Connie and Lula told me I should do it, and I hesitantly agreed. It was time to grow up and start getting a move on with my life. A new place to live would be a good step. I'd also be a homeowner, which came with more responsibility, but that was part of being an adult, right?

Lacy wrote up the offer and suggested I bid fifteen thousand less than the asking price. She said the cash offer would be very attractive over other slightly higher offers that would require financing. The other good thing about this house was that it had been remodeled in the last few years, so I really didn't need to do any work, except paint if I wanted. I gave Lacy a check as a part of the offer hold, trying not to shake as I signed the paperwork, and left with Connie and Lula. We got back to the bond's office, returned to our own cars and I went to my parents' house.

My dad was napping in the chair in the living room and Mom and Grandma were working on laundry.

"Hey," I said, jumping in to help fold towels. "I've got some good news. I put an offer down on a house today."

My mom and Grandma both looked stunned. "You're buying a house? Now?" Mom asked. "But you're all alone. Why wouldn't you wait until you're married so that you can have help with maintenance and bills?"

I told them about the big bond I had picked up and how I wouldn't have a mortgage. "Plus, it's time to grow up and move on from Morelli. I don't know that I'll ever get married, so I'm not going to sit around and wait in my crappy old apartment, especially while every criminal in Trenton seems to know where I live."

"I think it's great," Grandma Mazur said, as I described the house to them. "Maybe if I get tired of living here, I can move in with you."

I mentally made the sign of the Cross and asked God for a little bit of mercy so that Grandma wouldn't move in with me. My dad perked up at the sound of Grandma saying she'd consider moving out, and I told him about the house. My dad nodded his approval, said a house was a better investment than an apartment and went back to his nap.

I declined staying for dinner, and headed back to my apartment. I was starting to get tired and thought I'd make an early night of it. I picked up some chicken from Cluck-in-a-Bucket and went home, thinking I'd turn on TV and vegetate for the night. I was flipping through channels and eating my chicken when my phone started playing the Mission: Impossible theme song, which I had set as Ranger's ring tone. I ignored the phone, deciding I really wasn't in the mood to talk to him tonight. I intended to get a good night's sleep. I had opened a bottle of wine and was on my second glass. I knew I'd be asleep before I finished a third. I was already a little anxious about buying a house and his comments from the night before, so I didn't need anything else to worry about.

I didn't remember falling asleep, but I woke up sometime in the middle of the night to find my lights and television turned off, the blanket from my bed tucked around me on the couch, and Ranger lounging in the chair beside me with his eyes closed. He had taken off his gun belt and left it on the table in front of him. I was hazy from the wine and lack of sleep, so I decided not to worry about him then and closed my eyes, opening them again only when the sun was streaming through the windows. I looked over at the chair, but Ranger was gone. A quick peek around my apartment on my way to the bathroom told me he had left. It was after eight, so he was likely at work now, even though it was Sunday. Ranger stayed on the job around the clock.

I checked my phone and found the missed call from him and one from Lacy. There was also a voicemail.

"Hey Steph," came Lacy's voice on the message. "I gave the offer to the homeowner's realtor and they've accepted it! Congrats! I've got a call into a cousin of Tony's to do the inspection and he will do it tomorrow evening. The family has already said they can be out of the house by the end of the week, since they just closed on their new house last week. I'll give you a call after the inspection to let you know how it went. We'll need to set a date this week to get the closing finished and you'll officially be a homeowner."

Geez, Lacy had already closed a deal on a house and I hadn't even had coffee. Would I ever be one of those people? Ranger had already caught an FTA by nine yesterday morning, and Morelli used to leave the house to go into the office by six-thirty every day. Those thoughts made me groan. I don't know how I try to call myself an adult most days.

Deciding I was going to change my ways, I got dressed in a hurry and ran out the door. I was going to Mass this morning. Mom and Grandma would be at this service, so I could sit with them. Hopefully they didn't have heart attacks when I walked through the door.


	4. Margaritaville

_A/N: Everyone's reviews have been great. They've really spurred me on in my writing. I'm trying to make Stephanie grow up, but do it in a realistic manner. I hope you all enjoy this next chapter. _

After Mass, I went back to my parents' house for donuts. Grandma brought down her laptop and I was able to show them the house from the real estate website's virtual tour. Mom and Grandma made decorating suggestions, my dad commented on the kitchen cabinet quality and I started to feel a little buyer's remorse. I was terrified now to think that I was an almost-homeowner. I had put an offer down so quickly on it, I was beginning to worry that maybe I had been hasty. But I couldn't let that show in front of my mother, or I'd hear a massive "told you so".

I stopped at the market on the way home to get few necessities, and when I walked into my apartment, I found Ranger sitting on the couch.

"You've been busy. This is the third time in less than two days you've broken in. That I know of, at any rate," I told him as I kicked the door shut behind me.

Ranger stood and took one of the bags of groceries from me and we carried them into the kitchen.

"This time I'm here to tell you that I've been called out of the country for the next few days. I should be back by Friday."

He was leaving town again after only being back two days. This was another issue with being in a relationship with Ranger. He was constantly being called away, either for his other offices or on contracted jobs for the government. I never knew what he did in those missions. I assumed it was political assassination or inciting coups, but I never actually knew for sure.

"Where are you going?" I asked as I started putting groceries away.

"I'm doing security for a diplomat travelling abroad to a country with a high kidnapping rate."

"Oh, I thought maybe you were going to kill someone."

"Nah, I haven't done assassinations in years, babe."

I couldn't be sure if was he joking or not.

"Were you actually supposed to tell me what you were going to do?" I asked, folding up the grocery bag and putting it in the cabinet under the kitchen sink.

Ranger had been leaning against the counter while I had been busy. He pushed away from it, and walked over to me, putting his hand on my hip.

"No."

"Then why did you tell me?"

"I believe you reminded me earlier that you can be trusted with my secrets."

I gaped at him, not quite believing what I was hearing.

"You actually think I'm trustworthy with government secrets?"

Ranger gave me a small smile. "Yes, I do. Now, I have to get going, but I do want you to know that I will go along with whatever call you make about us. But you also need to know that I'm not going to have any of that 'vague-about-the-terms' bullshit kind of relationship you had with Morelli. I am monogamous and completely faithful in a relationship, and I expect the same in return. But if you decide that we're just going to be friends, then I'll respect that boundary. I'll hate it, may try to change your mind, but I won't push it too hard."

He gave me a panty-melting kiss, which caused me to grab onto his t-shirt and pull myself closer to him. When we broke apart, I was left feeling a bit frustrated.

"See ya, babe," he said, heading towards the door.

I watched him walk away and suddenly remembered something. "Hey, I forgot to tell you that I'm buying a house."

Ranger turned around and smiled at me. "I know," he said as he opened the door.

"Jackass!" I yelled after him, and I could hear him laugh as he walked down the hallway.

Lacy called me Monday evening to say that the inspection of the house had gone well, and there were no issues that the current owners would need to fix before they moved. We arranged to meet at noon on Wednesday at her office with the owners and their realtor. I needed to go to the bank and get a certified check for the total amount of the house to bring to the meeting.

Wednesday afternoon arrived more quickly than I would have liked. My knee bounced as I sat at the meeting, sliding my check across the table and signing my name to a bunch of documents. The now-former owners surprised me by handing me the keys. They had moved into their new house on Sunday, so my house was now empty and ready for me. I walked out of the meeting feeling chipper and ready for the next stage in my life. I was officially a grown-up.

I stopped in at the bond's office after I left Lacy's office. I held up the keys and jiggled them.

"Guess who's a homeowner?"

Connie and Lula squealed in excitement. "Girl, this calls for drinks," Lula said.

"How about this," I started, picking up a file waiting for me on Connie's desk. "you guys come over tonight, we'll make a pitcher of margaritas, and you can help me start packing?"

Lula grunted. "The margaritas sound good, but I hate packing."

"I'm in," Connie said, pulling a pad of paper in front of her. "I'll bring everything we need."

We also agreed on Chinese food and Connie and Lula said they would be over at five. I opened my file and found a couple of low-bonds skips that I picked up all the time. Both were hookers, neither ever gave me any trouble, so I took a drive down Stark Street and picked up Luis Queen, then Shoshana Brown. They chatted about the troubles of moving their corners and informing their regulars as I drove them to the police station.

My next stop was a moving company office. I bought a bunch of boxes and arranged to rent a small moving truck on Saturday. On my way in the building with the boxes, I ran into Dillion and told him I was moving out over the weekend. He told me that he would miss me and all of the firebombs, but was happy for me. He said to let him know if I needed any help moving.

I spent the afternoon getting the utilities turned on in my name at the house and arranging for my name to be removed from the apartment's utilities as of Sunday. I'd forgotten what a pain in the ass moving was, but hopefully I wouldn't be doing it again for a long time.

Lula and Connie showed up at half past five with margarita mix, glasses, a blender and our Chinese food. We started in the kitchen, since I did such little cooking, putting pots, pans and dishes in boxes and labeling them in black marker. By the third pitcher of margaritas, we had finished the kitchen and started in on my living room. I noticed the boxes Lula labeled had descriptions such as "shit from under the sink" and "stuff you don't use". By nine that evening, we were all fairly shit-faced and only had about half of my living room packed up. Connie and I crashed on my bed and left Lula to sleep on the couch, where she'd passed out.

Thursday morning at the bond's office was a drearier place than usual, with three of its four employees hung over. I'd brought McDonald's fries and Cokes for all of us, and was reviewing files of the people who failed to appear the day before. I had one violent guy who had cut off his neighbor's foot with an axe, one petty theft, one grand theft auto and two drunk and disorderly.

"I'm never drinkin' margaritas again," Lula said. She was lying down on the couch in the office, using her purse as an eye mask.

"I think we made them a little strong," I said, sipping my drink. "We used double the amount of alcohol we were supposed to on the last two batches."

"Not so loud," Connie's voice was muffled by the fact that she had her face buried on her desk under her arms. "I'm too old for this shit."

We all winced when the phone rang, the shrillness more piercing than usual. Connie referred the call back to Vinnie, who left a few minutes later to post bond for a woman who torched her boyfriend's car after finding him having sex with her sister.

We were silent for a few minutes before Lula spoke. "I can't do this anymore. I'm goin' home. I didn't sleep well on account of I was on Stephanie's couch. I'll be back later."

Connie and I rolled our eyes. She'd slept like a rock, snoring loud enough to wake up my neighbor.

After Lula left, Connie and I finished our food and started to feel a little more human. I was doing some phone work on my FTAs and Connie was typing on her computer.

"Have you decided what you're going to do about Ranger?" Connie asked once I'd hung up the phone.

"I've been trying to be a grown-up first then figure out the Ranger situation," I told her. "He told me the other day that he'd respect whatever decision I made, even though he'd probably try to change my mind if I insist that we only be friends."

Connie made a frustrated noise. "Then it seems settled, go get 'em girl!"

I shook my head. "It's not that simple. He tells me he respects whatever decision I make, yet when I initially told him I wanted to be with him, he acted like he was trying to convince me not to be with him. He's spent the last few years boinking me in closets and the Turbo, but sending me back to Morelli in the end because he 'doesn't do relationships'. He confuses me."

"You boinked in the Turbo?" Connie asked.

"Yes, but it wasn't easy. We had to have the door open, my ass kept hitting the horn and it was over in thirty seconds."

"Thirty seconds with Ranger would be better than thirty minutes with any other man," Connie said, fanning herself. I had to agree with her.

I left the bond's office and went to check on one of my FTAs, Melissa Elliott. She had been arrested for stealing two hundred dollars from the cash register at a convenience store. She'd distracted the attendant by flashing a little boob, then knocking a display of chapsticks into the floor behind the counter when the cashier had the drawer open. She'd reached in, grabbed a handful of twenty-dollar bills and hit the road. I knocked on her front door, hoping she was home. She wasn't a big bond, but the little ones added up fast.

An older woman, probably in her seventies, answered the door.

"Hi, I'm looking for Melissa Elliott," I said kindly. I hated when I had to haul people in when their parents or kids were around. I looked like a bad guy.

The woman's eyes immediately filled with tears. "Melissa died last week from a heart attack. The stress of going to court for her charges was too much for her."

And now I felt like real crap. "I'm sorry for your loss, ma'am. I didn't know."

I left the Elliott house and made a note on the file to go up to the health department and get a copy of Melissa's death certificate so we could get our money back from the bond. I decided to swing by my new house while I was in the neighborhood. I pulled up in the back, but didn't pull into the garage. I unlocked the back door and looked around, making sure the owners didn't forget anything that wasn't part of the agreement to stay. Lacy had not only worked her magic in getting them to accept a lower offer, but they left me the stove, refrigerator, built-in microwave, dishwasher, washer and dryer, all of which were less than three years old. I walked upstairs and checked out the bedrooms and the bathroom. The room I was going to use had a tan, plush carpet and pale blue walls. I decided I was going to keep the colors, as they were relaxing and mature. The smaller room would function as a guest room/office/whatever room. I would get a desk and put my computer and printer in here, and maybe get a futon or pull-out couch for any guests. I walked back downstairs and noticed an extra set of house keys and the remotes for the garage lying on the kitchen counter, alongside an envelope. Inside the envelope was a business card for Caesar Garcia, the Rangeman employee who did security system installations. On the back of the card, Ranger had written "Call him". I punched Caesar's number into my phone and he picked up on the second ring. He said he was in the neighborhood and would be there in five minutes.

I waited around the house, thinking about what all I needed to buy when Caesar showed up. He was dressed in Rangeman black and carrying a clipboard.

"Hey Caesar," I said, meeting him at the door. I'd only seen him one other time, but remembered him. He was a little shorter than me and lean. Good for getting into small places to install cameras.

"Stephanie," he replied, shaking my hand. "Ranger said you are to get anything you want in your system, and I'll have it installed by the time you move in Saturday. He said to consider it a housewarming gift."

"How did you know I'm moving in on Saturday?" I asked.

Caesar shrugged. "I just know what Ranger told me."

I rolled my eyes. I was fairly certain I had no secrets from Ranger. I'd done background checks for him before and knew the extent of information that he could accumulate. He likely knew the balance of my bank account, my SAT scores and the brand of tampons I used, so knowing that I'd rented a moving truck for Saturday didn't seem too difficult.

Caesar and I did a walkthrough of the house, identifying vulnerable areas, discussing closed-circuit video and motion detectors. He also said they would be changing the locks on the front, back and garage doors, so he would have the keys to me by tomorrow night. I left him the old keys and went back to the apartment to get more packing done. I ordered pizza and kept working through the evening so that by the time I was ready for bed, I had most of the apartment packed into boxes. I also had two piles of stuff that I wasn't taking with me. One was a donation pile that I would give to the thrift store, and the other was a garbage pile that I would take down to the dumpster on my way to work in the morning.

Standing in my living room, I looked around and thought about all of the memories I'd have when looking back on this place. When I first moved in, I was newly-separated from Dickie and working at E.E. Martin. Within six months, I was officially divorced and unemployed. I had good memories of evenings with Morelli and Bob, the first time Ranger and I slept together and the period of time when Grandma stayed with me. I also had some bad memories, such as the firebombs that had come through my window, the numerous times people had broken into my apartment and the time when Joyce used my place as a hideout while she was FTA. Then I had the horrible memories of finding Lula after Ramirez had hurt her, the people who had died or been found dead in my apartment, and the night when Julie and I were held hostage by Edward Scrog and Ranger walked in and got shot. The memory of Ranger getting shot still gave me chills. The calm look on his face as he walked in, hands in the air, knowing what would happen had made me realize what lengths he would go to for people he cared about. It was also the moment when I had realized I was in love with him.

I walked over the spot where I'd been sitting when Ranger was shot and looked over to the place where he'd fallen, bleeding profusely as Julie had tackled Scrog. I closed my eyes and recalled the emotions that had run through me in that moment. My bottom lip started to quiver as I opened my eyes. I knew what I needed to do; it was something I should have done long ago.

I picked up my cell phone and dialed Ranger's number. It went straight to his voicemail, so I left him a message.

"I need to tell you something: I'm in love with you. I have been for a long time, and I'm done letting you push me away. Get back home safely, and come see me when you're ready."

Saturday arrived quickly, bringing with it clear skies. Caesar had called me on Friday and asked me to meet him at the house to give me my new keys and show me how to use the alarm system. I'd chosen a six digit number that I could remember, but that wasn't so obvious any moron with access to Google could figure it out. I chose the date that I first met Ranger, not knowing if Ranger would remember it. I hadn't heard from Ranger since I left a message for him, and when I asked Caesar if he was back yet, I only received a "No".

Lula and Connie had agreed to help me with my move on Saturday after the bonds office closed. I picked up the rental truck at ten that morning and had started loading some of the boxes. They arrived a little after noon and we tackled the furniture.

"I should've rethought my wardrobe," Lula said after the fifth time her boobs popped of out her tube top as we carried the dining room table out of the building and into the moving truck. I rolled my eyes as we situated the table in the truck, pushing boxes underneath it to help keep it from sliding around and opening up room for the couch.

Connie came out carrying the two chairs from my dining room table. I noticed she was barefoot.

"Don't start," she said when she saw me looking at her feet. Between her four-inch stilettos and Lula's purple-sequined tube top, I had two of the most inept movers ever, but I wasn't going to complain. I appreciated the help nonetheless.

We got down out of the truck and were heading back to the door when a black Escalade pulled into the parking lot and parked in a spot on the other side of the truck. I knew it was a Rangeman vehicle and felt my pulse pick up, waiting to see if it was Ranger.

A minute later, Hal got out of the driver's seat and Ranger appeared from around the passenger side. I smiled and waved.

"Is Rangeman getting into the moving business?" I asked hopefully.

Ranger smirked. "We're mercenaries, babe. We'll do anything for the right price."

"Does the honor of spending time in the company of three of Trenton's most attractive bachelorettes pay the price for some help moving furniture?"

Hal and Ranger exchanged looks, probably thinking I was full of shit. "Ok, maybe not the most attractive, but the most desperate. Connie's had to resort to being barefoot, and I've seen more of Lula's boobs than I ever cared to see," I told them, getting a smile out of them both.

"Hunh, your ass," Lula said. "I got nice titties. Hal won't mind seeing them, will you?"

Poor Hal flushed red and headed inside the building. Lula and Connie followed, leaving me and Ranger standing outside.

"I thought you were supposed to be back on Friday," I asked, indicating that I was headed back inside. Ranger's expression was unreadable as he walked towards me.

"Our flight was delayed by a tropical storm in the Carribean," he told me, guiding me towards the stairwell. He opened the door and I walked inside. I was half way up the first set of stairs when Ranger grabbed my arm and spun me around. He came up level to me, pushed me against the wall and kissed me. It was a warm kiss with lots of tongue, and he had one hand on the back of my neck and the other on my ass, pulling me into him.

"I got your message when after I got off the plane in Newark," he told me after we broke apart. "I'm looking forward to continuing that conversation later."

The sound of the door on the second floor banging open caught our attention. I looked up to see Lula looking over the railing at us.

"Hal needs Ranger's help with the couch, on account of my titties keep falling out of my shirt when I try to pick it up and poor Hal can't handle it. You can grope each other on your own time. I got better things to do then be moving furniture today."

Ranger smiled and shook his head, grabbing my hand and we headed up to the second floor. Within half an hour, Hal and Ranger had the big furniture loaded onto the truck and Connie, Lula and I had gotten the last of the boxes shoved inside and the door closed. Connie and Lula were headed home, since I had Ranger and Hal to help with the big furniture. Hal would drive the moving truck over to my house and I would ride in the SUV with Ranger, since I'd left my car in the moving company's parking lot.

I went back up to the apartment for my purse, Rex's cage and to leave the keys on the counter for Dillion. I did one last check around the apartment to make sure nothing was left in the shower, closet or kitchen cabinets. I grabbed Rex, put the keys on the kitchen counter for Dillion, along with a note of thanks for his help over the years and telling him there was six-pack of beer in the fridge for him, put my purse on my shoulder and headed out the door. I said goodbye to Mrs. Besler, who was playing elevator operator and went out to the SUV. I climbed in the front next to Ranger and we drove off towards my house. The drive from my apartment to my new house was only five minutes, in which time we didn't speak. The conversation we needed to have would take more than five minutes, and there was no point in starting it when we wouldn't be alone for long.

Hal was waiting in front of the house when we arrived. I gave Ranger my keys and he unlocked the door. My new alarm system started beeping, indicating that I needed to punch in the security code. Ranger flipped open the panel on the keypad and punched in the code, quieting the alarm.

"A date that will live in infamy, babe," he said, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Agreed," I told him as I walked through the living room and into the kitchen, putting Rex down on the counter. Apparently Ranger did remember the exact date we first met.

"This is our new home, buddy," I told Rex. "I hope you like it."

Rex stood on his back legs, sniffed the air then went back into his soup can. The novelty had worn off already.

Hal and Ranger got my bedroom furniture upstairs and my living room furniture into the living area in less than an hour while I brought in the boxes and sorted them according to room. We finished our tasks about the same time, so I decided to return the truck and grab some lunch before I came back to start unpacking.

"I need to go back to the office and do some work," Ranger said as I was shutting the door. "I'll be back over this evening."

"OK. Thanks for helping me move," I said, waving to Hal, who was getting in the driver's seat of the SUV. He smiled and waved back. Ranger put a hand on my back, pulled me into a quick kiss and went to get in the car with Hal. I climbed in the truck and drove off, wanting to get back and get unpacked as quickly as possible, since my evening was likely to be filled with other activities.


	5. Let's Get It On

_A/N: Thanks again to my lovely readers for your reviews. They keep me inspired to keep on writing. I also wanted to say that I haven't been using a beta for this story, but try to read and reread it several times before I post it. I also tend to do a lot of my writing very late at night, so please excuse any typos you may come across. I'll try to correct any that I missed the first few read through once I realize them. _

By eight that evening I was dirty, tired and my whole body was sore. I had unpacked all of my boxes, rearranged furniture, and put my bed back together. Ranger had still never come over, which made me wonder if he wasn't going to have to bail on me tonight. Sometimes he had to pick up shifts at Rangeman if one of the guys called off sick.

I remembered my new Jacuzzi upstairs, and decided I was going to take a bath and relax. I showered quickly and stepped back out so that I could start drawing the bath. Once the tub filled up, I turned on the jets and stepped in, groaning at the feel of the massaging pressure on my aching muscles. I rolled up a small towel to rest behind my head, and closed my eyes. I wasn't sure how long I had been that way, but jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

It was Ranger.

"Jesus, you scared the crap out of me," I said, sitting up and causing the towel behind my head to fall into the tub.

"Sorry, babe but I didn't want you to drown," he told me, handing me a large purple towel. I turned off the jets, released the drain and stood, wrapping the towel around me.

Ranger scanned my body as I tucked my towel around me and grabbed a smaller towel to start drying my hair. His eyes were resting on the spot between my breasts where the towel was tucked in.

"Quitting staring," I told him, sponging out the excess water from the ends of my hair.

"Well hurry up and get dressed. I brought pizza and beer, and I believe you and I have a conversation to finish," he said, smacking me on the ass before he walked out of the bathroom.

I dressed in yoga pants and a t-shirt quickly before padding downstairs, the smell of Pino's wafting up to greet me. Ranger was getting out plates and napkins when I walked in the kitchen.

"You've learned your way around quickly," I told him, opening the pizza box.

"You don't have much, so I just had to locate cabinets that weren't empty."

I shrugged. "I'll get more stuff as I go along. Maybe I'll even learn how to cook. It's going to be part of the 'Stephanie's growing up' movement."

"Well, I'm impressed. You bought a house, and a nice one at that. Good job, babe."

I smiled at him, feeling warm at his compliment. Growing up wasn't so bad.

We took our pizza and beer into the living room and sat on the couch.

"I can't believe you brought pizza and beer. That doesn't seem in keeping with your 'the body is a temple' philosophy," I told him, biting into my pizza.

"I knew I'd have your focus better if I brought something you liked," he replied.

We finished our pizza while I asked about his trip. He told me he had accompanied a trade commission to Bolivia. He said it went well, nothing out of the ordinary happened with the exception of having to wait for a different flight back home due to bad weather. I suspected that "nothing out of the ordinary" meant that he'd had to threaten people, possibly shoot a couple, but that no one died.

We cleaned up after ourselves, put the rest of the pizza in the fridge and went back to the living room. Ranger sat down in the middle of the couch and pulled me down next to him. I curled my legs underneath me and started playing with a piece of my hair.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked. I didn't have to ask what he meant.

"Yes," I told him. "I know I love you, and I want to see where we could go if we gave a real relationship a try."

Ranger ran a finger along my jawbone and looked into my eyes. "I can't promise you anything, babe. I've been alone for a long time. I'm not sure if I'll ever want to get married, but I'm not ruling it out. I don't know that I'll ever want a family, but I do know that I want to be with you. Are you sure that's acceptable?"

I'd never been certain about marriage and family either. My marriage to Dickie had been a disaster, and I didn't really know much about kids. My mother was constantly nagging at me to get married, but sometimes I thought that marriage was overrated. You could be in a relationship with someone that was just as good, even without a piece of paper legally binding you to each other and mutual ownership of property.

"I am, but I do want you to open up to me. I feel like I barely know you sometimes. I don't expect to know all of your deepest, darkest secrets, but I want to know more about you, your family and so forth."

"You may change your mind about that after meeting my family. Your family may be crazier, but mine is larger and louder," Ranger said with a small smile. "I'll try to be more open, I promise, but it won't be easy. It doesn't come naturally to me. But if I'm adamant about not telling you about something, can you please respect that and not push the issue? There are things I can't talk about, things that are just too painful to talk about, and things that I will tell you if or when I think you can handle the information."

I nodded, knowing there was nothing to argue about. He was right; he'd seen and done things that I may not want to know about, and by pushing him to answer something, I could cause problems between us. My problem was that I'm a naturally inquisitive—OK, nosey —person by nature, and I may not be able to distinguish the difference between Ranger being Ranger, and Ranger's warning of not pushing the issue. I guess it's just one more thing to add to the "Growing Up" to-do list.

Ranger ran his palm across my cheek and around the back of my head, pulling me towards him. Our lips met and I melted into him. Almost instinctually, I felt guilty as my mind went to Morelli. I then remembered that Morelli and I were no longer playing the off-and-on game, and I was officially in a relationship with Ranger, so my guilt was unfounded. I pushed the guilt away and enjoyed the fact that I was kissing my boyfriend.

I started giggling mid-kiss, causing Ranger to pull back suddenly. Giggling soon turned into full-on cracking up. I couldn't stop laughing. I laid my head on the back of the couch and let the feeling consume me, knowing resistance was futile. I tried to figure out what was happening. I'd kissed Ranger more times than I could count, yet I'd never started cracking up. I'd had bouts of guilt, yes, but never laughter. I realized it had started when I thought of Ranger as my "boyfriend". There was nothing 'boy' about Ranger. The term felt juvenile for thirty-two year-olds who had already been intimate on a number of occasions. I realized it was also to do with being in a real relationship with Ranger, something I never thought would happen.

"Wanna let me in on the joke?" Ranger asked, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.

I went through four rounds of "OK, I'm good. Really…" and then losing it again before I pulled it together enough to talk.

"I called you my 'boyfriend' in my head after we started kissing," I said, a small giggle squeaking out. God, I felt like I was fifteen again.

That earned a full-on smile from Ranger. "I've been called worse.

"It was just the term. It sounds juvenile, and definitely doesn't fit you. There's nothing boyish about you; you're very manly. Maybe I can call you my 'manfriend'?"

Ranger stared at me for a few moments before throwing his head back and bursting into laughter. He didn't laugh like that often, so I enjoyed seeing it when it happened, though it was usually at my expense. Like now.

"Phew, that was good, babe," Ranger said pulling me in for a quick kiss. "I don't care what you call me, just don't call me 'bad in bed'. Speaking of which...,"

Ranger grabbed my hand and pulled me up to standing. He continued to hold my hand as he locked the front door, set the alarm, turned out the lights and headed upstairs. Once inside my bedroom, Ranger pulled me up against him and kissed me deeply. His tongue touched mine, setting off a fire in my body. I ran my hands up his chest, over his shoulders and into his hair. He grabbed my ass, and pulled me up against him. I could feel his erection press into my stomach, which made me groan into our kiss. I pushed him back against my bed and he fell, bringing me down on top of him. I straddled him and started working on his shirt, pulling it up over his head. Ranger reached behind him and pulled his back-up gun from the small of his back, handing it to me to place on the bedside table. I then moved off of him to start working on his pants. Ranger leaned over and pulled up his pants leg, revealing a knife in a holster. He repeated the process of giving me the knife to put up for safe-keeping before lying back down on the bed. I paused as I started on the button of his cargo pants.

"You don't have a bomb attached to your fly, do you? I feel like I'm trying to break into Fort Knox here," I told him.

He smiled at me. "Fireworks don't start until we're both naked, babe."

He lifted his hips as I started pulling his pants down, pausing to take off his heavy boots and socks. Once I finally had his pants off, I took a minute to look at a very naked, and very aroused, Ranger.

"For a lapsed Catholic, I've been very blessed. Who knew I could get something as hot as you just from showing up to Mass on Sunday?"

I tossed my t-shirt dramatically onto the floor and shimmied out of my yoga pants. Once I was naked, Ranger leaned forward, grabbed my arm and pulled me onto the bed with him, kissing my neck as he ran his fingers down my body, leaving a trail of fire. Twenty minutes later, Ranger had me moaning loudly, testing out the soundproofing between my house and the townhouse next to mine.

We lay together for a while, both of us breathing loudly and rapidly. I felt like my heart was about to beat out of my chest. Sex with Ranger was always amazing. He had the ability to make me feel like I'd just had some of the most out-of-control, sweaty monkey sex with a tenderness and passion that only came from making love. I was just about to fall asleep in his arms when his cell phone started ringing from the vicinity of the dark floor. I made a disgusted sigh as Ranger got up, dug out his phone and answered it. He listened for a minute, then said he'd be there in twenty and hung up.

"I have to go, babe. One of my men just called off, so I need to cover a patrol shift," he said, pulling his pants on.

I sat up in bed, pulling the sheet up over my chest. "Ok, you asked me not to hound you on issues that you don't want to talk about, right? So now, I'm asking something of you. I want you to take one night off every week. I don't care which night. It doesn't even have to be the same night every week, but I am asking you to take off one night every week where you don't have your phone on and you spend the night here with me. We can stay in, or we can go out, but the point is that it's you and me spending time together without interruptions."

Ranger had been dressing the entire time I talked, pulling on his shirt, socks and shoes and replacing his weapons. He had just started to open his mouth when his phone rang again. I rolled my eyes and fell back onto my pillow, laying my arm over my eyes as he answered in a tone that expressed his displeasure. He listened for a minute and hung up without saying another word.

"I'll see you later, babe," he said, and I heard his footsteps walk out of my bedroom and down the stairs. I heard him hit some buttons on the alarm and shut the front door behind him. I rolled over and lay in the spot that was still warm from Ranger. We'd been a couple for two hours, and he already got called into work. I started to worry that he might not like my demand of taking a night off every week to spend with me. The longer I thought about it, the more self-centered and petty it seemed. He ran a successful business, one that required him to stay actively involved all of the time to be sure that his employees were doing their jobs well, and adapting to the changes that come with increasingly intelligent and creative criminals.

I finally fell asleep around one in the morning, thinking that I would apologize to Ranger later, citing exhaustion and raging hormones for my demanding outburst. When I woke up a few hours later, I realized it was because Ranger was sitting on the edge of the bed, taking off his boots. He took off his gun belt, put his back-up piece and knife on the bedside table and lay down next to me. He rolled over and seemed surprised to find me watching him.

"Hey, I didn't mean to wake you up," he said, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. "I just got in, and I'm beat. I'm gonna get a couple of hours sleep. Are you staying in bed, or getting up for the morning?"

I looked over Ranger's shoulder at the clock on my bedside table. If I wanted to go to Mass, I had an hour to get ready. I debated for a minute whether to stay in bed with Ranger, or go to church. Last week was the first non-Christmas Mass I'd been to in years, and I'd told myself last week that going to Mass on Sundays was going to be part of the "Growing Up" plan.

I groaned and sat up in bed. "I need to get up; I gotta go to Mass. Damn me and my plans," I said, kicking off the covers. I'd never gotten redressed after sex the night before, so I was naked as I got up and started grabbing clothes.

"Besides, it will give you a couple of uninterrupted hours of sleep. You look exhausted."

Ranger nodded and closed his eyes, burying his face in the pillow I'd been sleeping on just moments before. I quickly grabbed everything I'd need and headed to the bathroom. My hair looked like crap, so I jumped in the shower to wash off the smell of sex and get my hair wet enough to become manageable once more. I put on the black skirt, red shirt and black jacket I'd picked out and bent down to put on my shoes, then swearing when I realized I'd grabbed my brown heels instead of black.

I tiptoed quietly back into my bedroom and opened the closet door to exchange the shoes. I looked over at Ranger, who was sleeping peacefully and went back out, shutting the door softly behind me. I hurried downstairs, got coffee going and looked around for something to eat. I really wanted a donut, but settled for toast with some White Chocolate Peanut Butter I'd recently discovered.

I ate and drank quickly, brushing crumbs off of me as I turned off the alarm and walked out the back door to my car, which was parked in the garage. To my dismay, I found Ranger's Turbo parked in the small driveway behind the garage, thus blocking me in. I swore, turned around and went back in the house. I found a piece of paper and pen, jotting a quick note to Ranger than I was taking the Turbo to Mass because he had blocked me in, and left him the keys to my car in case he needed to leave. Not that I imagined he'd be caught dead driving my ten year-old green Camry, but I didn't want to leave him stranded. He'd left his keys on the hooks I had put up in the kitchen for such an occasion, so I grabbed them and replaced them with mine, rolling up the note and sticking it through the key rings. The clock told me I had twelve minutes until Mass started, and it was a seven minute drive in good traffic to get to church. I was just about to shut the back door behind me when I realized I didn't have any house keys to use to get back inside. I didn't want to have to wake up Ranger when I came home, so I turned and went back into the house again, taking down my keys, extracting the house keys from the rest of the key chain, hanging them back up along with the note, and leaving the house once more. That had eaten up two more minutes of my time to spare, so I had a foot to the floor as I hurried to church in Ranger's sports car.

By the time I got back home two hours later, I was not in a good mood. I'd nearly had an accident on my way to church, which sent my blood pressure through the roof at the thought of damaging another of Ranger's cars. Then, I slipped in mud as I ran across the parking lot to get into the church and skinned my knees. I had made it in the doors just in time to sit down with Mom and Grandma and my cell phone started ringing. The display told me it was Lula, but I had shut it off quickly, ignoring the glares of people around me. Finally, once the service was over, I had been cornered by Bella Morelli, who proceeded to threaten me with the evil eye for causing her favorite grandson to move so far away. I'd gone to my parents' for after-church donuts, during which time my mom proceeded to tell me about all of the single men in the area. I had planned to tell them about my relationship with Ranger, but after the morning I'd had, I decided to tell them later. I wasn't in the mood for Grandma's comments about how hot he was and her questions about whether he was good in bed, coupled by my mom's interrogation about if we'd be getting married soon.

I got home at half past ten and walked upstairs, where Ranger was still asleep in my bed. I kicked off my heels, took of my jacket and crawled in bed. I snuggled up next to him and he put an arm around me, pulling me close. I breathed in the smell of his shower gel, which made me feel like something was right with the world. At least, until I remembered the demands I'd made of Ranger the night before, which made me nervous again.

"Busy morning?" Ranger asked, kissing me on the top of the head.

"Growing up is bullshit," I said into his chest.

I felt him chuckle. "It has its moments."

I looked up at him and saw he was awake now, looking down at me with an amused expression on his face. Ranger somehow always managed to go from fast asleep to perfectly awake without any transition. I required a cup of coffee to even remember my own name after waking up.

"I'm sorry about last night," I told him. Ranger looked confused.

"Sorry about what? For calling me your 'manfriend', or for the great sex?" he asked.

"No, about being so demanding last night after you got called into work. I thought about it after you left, and I realized it sounded petty. You're a busy man; you own a company and you have to stay engaged with it. I blame exhaustion and great sex for my outburst."

Ranger propped himself up on an elbow and looked down at me, his expression serious. "Babe, what you asked of me wasn't unreasonable. We're in a relationship now, and that means there are things that we both have to work on in order to make it work. I think your suggestion is good, and I'm going to do it. I want to be able to spend uninterrupted time with you, but I am requesting that these nights not include dinner with your family. I'm not saying I won't go with you occasionally, but I don't want to waste my free night doing it. Is that fair?"

I nearly fainted with relief. He wasn't angry with me and better yet, he was in agreement about the arrangement. I leaned up and kissed him.

"Deal."


	6. Bad Romance

_A/N: Thanks to all of my wonderful readers. I love your reviews, and hope you enjoy this next chapter. _

Ranger and I crawled out of bed at one o'clock, having spent the remainder of the morning alternating between napping and having sex. I made us some turkey sandwiches for lunch, and we were watching a football game on television when my phone rang. It was my mom.

"I'm making fried chicken and pineapple upside-down cake for dinner," she said. "Should I set you a place?"

"Absolutely," I told her, peeking over at Ranger, who shook his head. Know-it-all.

"I was thinking of inviting Jimmy Tortelli for dinner as well," my mom said. "He's single, and he's doing very well managing the automotive store."

I groaned and cuddled into Ranger's chest. "Mom, don't invite Jimmy to dinner. I don't need set up. I'm actually seeing someone."

There was a pause on the other end of the phone. "What? When? Why didn't you saying something this morning after church? Who is he? Bring him to dinner tonight!" I slapped myself in the forehead while my mother went on with her questions.

"Mom, save your questions for dinner tonight," I told her, feeling Ranger chuckle. "And he can't come, he's busy. I'll see you later." I hung up before she could start up her questions again.

I looked up at Ranger, who was trying to keep the smile off his face. "You do realize you'll have to face them from time to time, right? You can't always be working, or have an emergency come up to get out of it. There are only so many break-ins and sick employees that can get you out of dinner."

Ranger kissed my forehead. "There's always at least one country in need of a coup," he replied.

I got to my parents' house at five minutes to six. Ranger had left a little after two, saying he needed to get showered, changed and back into the office, as he still had work waiting for him after being gone much of the last four weeks. I walked in to find Grandma and Mom getting the table ready, and Dad walking to the table to take his spot. I helped bring out the rest of the food, and we all sat down to start eating.

"Now will you tell us about this man you're suddenly dating?" Mom asked, looking at me expectantly.

"It's Ranger. We decided to start seeing each other exclusively yesterday," I said, taking a bite of my fried chicken.

"Ooo, he's hot. Well done, Stephanie," Grandma Mazur said, clapping her hands together. "And I bet he's rich too. He drives all those expensive cars."

Mom looked stunned. "I didn't realize you had that kind of a relationship with him. He has a good job, and he makes you happy. That's all that matters, right?" she said, taking a big swig of her wine.

I was a bit surprised by this. Mom was always complaining about my job and its dangers. I guess it's different if it's a man doing the job.

"He does. He's a good man, and we love each other. We're not rushing into anything, though. We've both been divorced, and want to make sure things will work out long-term before even considering marriage." I gave my mom a significant look, since I knew that was likely to be one of her questions.

"But I don't want to call him 'Ranger'," Mom said, pouring herself more wine. "It just sounds wrong to say 'This is my daughter Stephanie, and her boyfriend, Ranger.' What should I call him instead?"

"His full name is Ricardo Carlos Manoso, but he goes by Carlos. Ranger is the nickname he uses at work. He and most of his men are ex-military, where nicknames are very common," I explained.

"He isn't Italian," my father piped in. I hadn't realized he'd been listening to the conversation. "But he looks more terrifying than any mobster ever could."

"His family is Cuban. And yes, he's terrifying if you don't know him. He presents that way because of being in Special Forces, and now the security business." I didn't mention that even when you knew him as intimately as I did, he was still kind of scary.

"I bet he's good under the covers," Grandma said, winking at me. "Have you found out yet?"

I shoveled mashed potatoes in my mouth as quickly as I could to avoid the question. Thankfully, my mom didn't want to know this information any more than I wanted to give an answer.

"Is his family around here?" she asked, giving Grandma a disapproving glare.

"I know his parents and one of his grandmothers live in Newark, which is where he grew up. He has another grandmother and his daughter in Miami. He has one brother and four sisters, but I don't know if they are still in the Jersey."

"I forgot he had a daughter," my mom said, looking thoughtfully. "She was the little girl that was kidnapped, right? The one you helped get back and then Carlos was shot in your apartment when confronting the man?"

I nodded. "Yes, Julie. She's almost twelve now. She lives with her mom and step-father."

"Does she visit often?"

I shook my head. "I don't know that she's ever come up here to visit. Ranger hasn't been very involved in her life. He was young when she was born, and in the Army. He let her step-father adopt her when she was little, but Ranger still pays support and visits when he's invited. He has a good relationship with the whole family."

"Does he want more children?" Mom asked, making me roll my eyes.

"Mom, we've been a couple for about twenty-four hours. Let's hold off on the children discussion for while."

Later, after I got home with a bag of fried chicken and cake, I thought more about Julie and Ranger. I hadn't heard Ranger mention Julie again since right after he was shot. I had asked how Julie was doing, and Ranger had replied she had been doing well getting readjusted after the kidnapping, but that had been the extent. I didn't know how often he saw her, or if their relationship had changed since he saved her life. Julie had been worried about him after he was shot. I'd been amazed at her strength when she attacked Scrog and shot him after he shot Ranger. She'd also insisted on riding in the ambulance with him to the hospital. I felt bad thinking about the fact that she and I had been held captive together and she had likely saved Ranger's life, but I hadn't asked about her again. I resolved to change that the next time Ranger and I were together.

I went to the bond's office the next morning, intending to get started on the four open FTAs I had, and heading to get the death certificate for Melissa Elliott. The after effects of Ranger sex had still been plastered on my face, because as soon as I walked in, Connie and Lula broke into equal grins.

"Someone got some this weekend," Lula said. "Was that your payment for the moving services?"

Connie gave me a significant look, silently asking if my decision was final. I nodded.

"Ranger and I are dating," I announced, which earned me a round of applause.

"I don't know how you manage to get all of these hot men, but for some reason they like you. At least this one isn't a cop," Lula said.

Connie rolled her eyes at the backhanded compliment.

I had Connie run some checks on my four open FTAs and told her about Melissa Elliott dying. She found out that the guy who cut off his neighbor's foot was no longer employed; presumably his boss thought he would get violent again, so he should be at home. His name was Joseph York, he was twenty-nine and the size of a linebacker. Louise Griffith had stolen her brother's car after he failed to repay her the five hundred dollars he had borrowed twenty years ago. She lived with their mother one block away from my parents. The drunk and disorderly FTAs were actually a married couple named Taylor and Sunshine Coromon. They had been celebrating their first wedding anniversary at the local park and had too much to drink. A police officer had caught them having sex on a picnic table and when they refused to stop rutting like animals and put their clothes back on, he'd arrested them.

"Let's go get York first, and get him out of the way. Hopefully the others won't be too hard," I told Lula.

"No way. I ain't going over to some lunatic's house who cuts off his neighbor's foot. I like my feet and I need both of them on account of I have too many shoes to wear on just one foot," she told me, settling into the couch with a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey.

I waved goodbye and walked out to my car. York lived on Martin Street, which branched off of Stark. Not my favorite part of town. I was about a block away from York's house when my phone rang. It was Ranger.

"What's up?" I asked as I turned onto Stark Street.

"I have another security system I need your input on. Where are you?" he asked.

"I'm on Stark Street. I need to pick up an FTA on Martin."

"Who is it?"

"Joseph York. Cut off his neighbor's foot with an axe after a disagreement."

"Is Lula with you?"

"No, she didn't want to come. She said she has too many shoes to be minus a foot."

"I've tangled with Joe York in the past. I'll meet you there and help you get him to the police station."

I disconnected and turned onto Martin Street, finding York's house about halfway down the block. It was a dilapidated ranch, with peeling yellow paint and a scary-looking dog chained up out front. It began barking and pulling at the chain as soon as I got out of the car. I had my stun gun, pepper spray and cuffs in my pockets. I locked the Camry and walked up to the yard, giving the dog a wide berth. I knocked on the front door and waited, hoping the dog didn't break the chain and eat me. After a minute, the door opened, revealing a man the size of Tank. He was wearing a wife-beater tank top and blue boxers. I repressed a shudder as I spoke.

"Joe York?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm Stephanie Plum, from your bail bond's company. You missed your court date, and I need to take you in to get rescheduled."

York stepped outside, towering over me. He looked at me like I was lunch, licking his lips.

"I don't mind going in with a sexy little bounty hunter like you," he said, walking towards me. I immediately began stepping backwards, hoping I didn't fall over something. "But I think you'll have to convince me, if you know what I mean."

"Not going to happen," I said, reaching in my back pocket for my stun gun. "You need to get dressed and we'll go get in the car."

York was too quick for me, grabbing my arm which in turn caused me to knock the stun gun out of my pocket and onto the ground. York kicked the stun gun towards his dog, which started trying to eat it. I tried to fight him off, but York's strength was too much for me. He pulled me up against his body and started grinding against me. Nausea rolled over me at the feeling of his erection against my stomach, along with the knowledge that I would get raped if I didn't get away very soon. I was pulled too closely to his body to be able to kick him in the balls, so I bit him on the arm as I tried to push away.

"You bitch!" He screamed, pulling back enough to strike me while still holding tight to me with his other hand. He was about to hit me again when a shot rang out, hitting York in the shoulder. I fell to the ground and scrambled away. I looked over and saw Ranger with his gun drawn, running towards us from his car. York was yelling and clutching his shoulder.

"Get on the ground, hands behind your back," Ranger ordered, his gun still trained on York. York charged at Ranger, and Ranger fired again, hitting York in the knee. York fell to the ground, screaming. Ranger straddled York and cuffed him behind his back.

"Are you ok?" he asked, looking over at me. I was shaking slightly and my left cheekbone was killing me.

I nodded. "I think so. Just sore from where he hit me."

Ranger called 911, and gave me a hand up. He looked at my cheek. "I don't think anything's broken, but you're going to have a nasty bruise tomorrow."

I nodded and Ranger pulled me into him. I did some deep breathing, taking in Ranger's scent. I found it hard to settle my nerves though, when I could feel the anger coming off of him. We heard the sirens in the distance, and the police and an ambulance arrived about a minute later, followed by a Rangeman vehicle. York was restrained on a gurney and loaded into the back of the ambulance while police officers took my and Ranger's statements. I declined a trip to the hospital, but accepted an ice pack from a paramedic. One of the police officers gave me a body receipt for York, and Ranger and I were free to head back to our cars.

"Do you still want me to look at that system today?" I asked, readjusting the ice pack while we walked.

Ranger shook his head. "No, I called the client while you were being examined by the paramedic and rescheduled for tomorrow. Do you want me to take you home? I can have one of my men follow in your car."

I considered my options for a moment. I still had the Coromons and Griffith to pick up. They weren't charged with violent crimes, so I thought I was safe.

"Thanks, but I have three more FTAs to pick up. One grand theft auto and a married couple charged with drunk and disorderly. I doubt they'll be too hard to pick up," I told Ranger, palming my keys.

"I'll help you. I have some time open since we aren't doing the system walkthrough today. Give Woody your car keys and he can drop it off for you. We'll take the Cayenne and pick up the rest of your people."

Normally, I'd be mildly offended at Ranger's presumptuousness, but today I was thankful. I was still keyed up after the attack. The knowledge that I would have been raped if Ranger hadn't known where I was going and been on his way sent a chill through me. I handed Woody my car keys, thanked him and climbed into the Cayenne next to Ranger. I gave him Louise Griffith's address, which was off of Broad Street. When we arrived at Louise's house, I went up to the door while Ranger idled in the car. I knocked on her door, and a woman in a very tight white dress answered. She was around forty and around my height with brown hair and green eyes. She was pretty, if you could look past the fact that her dress was so sheer, you could tell she wasn't wearing a bra or panties, and that she preferred a Brazilian bikini wax.

I gave her the line of missing her court date and needing to reschedule. She looked out at the car, seeing Ranger in the driver's seat. I grimaced as I saw her nipples get hard.

"I'll go in, but only if that sexy man comes up to handcuff me," she said, biting on her bottom lip. I rolled my eyes. This was another situation I'd have to deal with when in a relationship with Ranger. I'd never met a woman who didn't drool over Ranger. We'd even arrested a lesbian once who said she'd bat for the other team if Ranger would have her. I looked over at Ranger and motioned for him to come to the door. He turned off the car and walked up to us, and I noticed his gaze didn't go lower than Louise's face.

"Louise says she will go in, but wants you to be the one to handcuff her," I told him.

Louise pushed her arms out in front of her which moved her boobs up and out for better viewing. "Hey there, sexy," she said, her voice taking on a deep, sultry tone that had no doubt lured many men into her bed.

Ranger rolled his eyes as he put the cuffs on her. My bad habit seemed to be rubbing off on him.

"Wouldn't you like to come inside and have a little fun with these first?" she asked, holding up her wrists. She turned to look at me. "You can wait in the car, honey."

Ranger and I both grabbed an arm and escorted Louise into the back of the Cayenne. I went up to shut her front door and returned to the car to find her talking to Ranger, who was steadfastly ignoring her.

"How about after I get out later today? I can cancel my plans for tonight so we could have all night long," she said, trying to catch Ranger's eye in the rearview mirror. I buckled my seat belt and we backed out of the drive and headed to the police station.

She continued to make suggestions, to which Ranger made no comment. After five minutes, she started to get irritated.

"Does he not know how to talk?" she asked me.

"He doesn't talk much," I replied. "Especially when he's not interested in the topic of conversation."

Louise huffed. "What man isn't interested in sex?

"It's not that he's not interested in sex, it's the fact that he's not interested in sex with you."

"You don't know that."

"I do."

"Don't."

I looked over at Ranger, who looked like he was fighting off a smile.

"She's right," he finally told Louise.

Louise leaned forward as much as she could in the seatbelt. "Why not, honey? You got a girlfriend at home who wouldn't understand?"

"Yes, but that's not the only reason."

"I think you should know I don't have a gag reflex, so I can —,"

"I do have a gag reflex, and you're testing it," I told her. "So shut up."

We pulled into the police station and unloaded Louise a minute later. I went inside to get my body receipt and headed out to the car, thankful Ranger hadn't decided I wasn't worth the wait and abandoned me.

"I bet you're now wishing you hadn't offered to help me," I told him.

"I was hoping you'd shoot her. I would have done it, but I've already shot someone today. It might have looked bad."

Our next stop was the Coromons' house. We knocked on the door, but no one answered. I tried the knob and found it unlocked, so Ranger and I walked in. We could hear noise coming from a room in the back of the house, so Ranger and I walked down the hall and towards the source. We turned and walked into a bedroom to find a man and a woman in the doggy –style position, facing away from us. Not the best view. We backed out of the room and stood a few feet down the hall.

"Taylor and Sunshine Coromon?" I yelled. "We're bond enforcement. You missed your court date and you need to get rescheduled. We need you to get dressed and come with us."

"Give us five more minutes," a man's voice said, and we heard their moaning start up again.

"What the hell?" I asked, throwing my hands in the air. "Did someone put an aphrodisiac in the water today? First York humps me, then Louise Griffith tries to seduce you, and now we have to walk in on these two. I'm done for the day. I'm shooting the next horny person I have to deal with today."

Ranger guided me down the hall towards the front door. "I hope I'm an exception to that rule."

I rolled my eyes.

We stood silently near the front door, listening for the big finale. Ten minutes later, Sunshine and Taylor were in the back of the Cayenne, and we were pulling into the police station once more. They thanked us for letting them finish as we walked them to the check-in desk. The officer sitting there chuckled as he read the report.

"Must be in the air today," he said as he filled out our body receipts. "That chick you brought in earlier has been trying to get a date by doing her best Basic Instinct move every time a man walks past the holding cell."

I wrinkled my nose as I took the paperwork and we left the station. Connie called Ranger's cell phone as we drove, saying she had an FTA for him, so we stopped in at the office so Ranger could pick up his file and I could turn in my body receipts.

"What happened to you?" Lula asked. She was sitting at Connie's desk and they were sharing a bucket of chicken. I snatched a piece of chicken and informed them of my run-in with York and about Ranger helping me bring in the other three FTAs.

"Damn," Connie said as she wrote out my checks. "It's a good thing Ranger was on his way. You could be the one in the hospital otherwise." I shuddered at the thought.

"Is there anything else?" I asked Connie. "If not, I'm going to call it a day."

Connie shook her head. "Just this one for Ranger. John Lee. Human trafficking and possession of a controlled substance. He's a million dollar bond, but word has it he's skipped to Seattle to his brother's house."

Ranger took the file and read it quickly. He nodded to Connie and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the door. "See ya tomorrow," I told Connie and Lula, who smiled and waggled their eyebrows.

Ranger drove me home and idled out front. "I need to get back to the office, but I want to see you tonight. How about dinner and spending the night at my place?"

I considered that for a moment. Ella's cooking was amazing, and Ranger's sheets were infinitely softer than mine. "Sounds good. I'll be over around six."

Ranger watched me for a minute. "Are you sure you're ok? You had a close call today."

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm good. Thanks for saving my bacon. Again."

He kissed me lightly on the lips, then on my cheek where York had hit me. "Later, babe."

I went inside the house and plopped down on the couch, groaning when my back hit the hard, unexplainable ridge that was between each of the cushions. I sat up swearing, trying to figure out the emotions I was experiencing. I couldn't quite name the feeling, but it was something like disappointment. Did I think that just because I was dating Ranger than I'd suddenly be able to take down FTAs better, as though his skills would transfer to me just because I was his girlfriend? I went into the kitchen and found a bag of frozen french fries to put on my face. I went upstairs and started packing an overnight bag to take the Ranger's. I made sure to pack my whole make-up case, as I'd need it to cover up the bruise I'd find in the morning. Once the fries started to soften, I put them back in the freezer and headed upstairs to take a shower, trying to wash off the feeling of York's hands on me. I took a nap and woke up at a quarter to six. I went downstairs, gave Rex some food and told him I'd be back in the morning. I made sure the house was locked up and set the alarm as I went outside.

I got in my car and found the keys under the floor mat. I made it to Rangeman at exactly six, fobbing my way into the underground garage, onto the seventh floor and into Ranger's apartment. I threw my keys in the tray by the door, kicked off my shoes and put them along with my overnight bag in Ranger's dressing room. I went to the kitchen and poured myself a glass of wine and took it to the living room, where I settled on the couch and turned on a re-run of Sex and the City. Charlotte York was informing her friends of her intentions to convert to Judaism when Ranger walked in and informed me Ella had just brought dinner up.

While we ate a chicken and rice stew, I started thinking about my conversation with my mom the night before about Julie. I'd promised myself I would ask about her the next time I talked to Ranger.

"How's Julie doing?" I asked. "I always mean to ask about her." Ok, that was a lie, but he didn't know that.

"She's well."

I rolled my eyes and I stared at Ranger expectantly. I was well aware he didn't do small talk, but as his girlfriend, I was holding him to a higher standard. He looked up at me, setting down his spoon.

"What?"

"That's it? 'She's well?'"

"What did you expect me to say?"

"I've been wondering if things were different between you after the kidnapping. Do you see her more often? I'm curious. It's a part of your life you don't really talk about," I told him.

Ranger took a sip of wine. "Since the kidnapping, she's started calling me, which is something we'd never done before. I usually talk to her once a month. I hear about her friends, her school, the latest nonsense her younger siblings have gotten up to, and she tells me I need to make you my girlfriend. I used to only see her two or three times a year, but now I see her every couple of months."

I smiled. "She's a pretty great kid, and clearly very smart, since she kept telling you that you should make me your girlfriend."

Ranger smiled. "Yeah, I'd told her you had a boyfriend already, but she told me she thought I could take him. She remembered Morelli from when she was here, and said he looked like a little runt."

I started laughing. ''She has guts. I think she was braver than me through the whole thing, and she went through more of it. That night at my old apartment really changed things. You and Julie now talk more, and that was the night I realized I was in love with you."

Ranger looked surprised. "Really? That night?"

I nodded. "I think I had been in love with you for a while, but that was when I first realized it. The knowledge that you could have been killed…" I trailed off, shuddering slightly. I'd never spoken to Ranger much about what happened with Scrog, and I definitely hadn't told him about realizing I was in love with him.

Ranger looked like he was going to say something, but decided against it. Instead, he stood up and started clearing the table, taking the dishes to the kitchen. I followed suit and we rinsed our dishes and put them in the dishwasher. At a couple of different points, I felt like Ranger wanted to say something, but changed his mind again. Once we had turned off the kitchen light, we went into the living room and settled down on the couch. Ranger wrapped an arm around me, pulling me into him. He kissed the top of my head before pulling back to look at me.

"Do you want to know when I realized I was in love with you?" he asked.

"Is the Pope Catholic?" I asked, causing Ranger to roll his eyes.

"I realized it after the first night we spent together. I had thought that after we slept together, I'd be able to better focus and move on from the sexual tension and attraction that was there between us. But that night after you'd gone to sleep, I laid there watching you and was amazed at how my view on your position in my life had changed so suddenly. I knew I'd do anything for you, and that if you ever married Morelli it would be more painful that any physical injury. When I was driving home from your apartment that next morning, I knew I was in love with you."

I nearly fainted as Ranger spoke from simply holding my breath. That night had been an entire year before Julie was kidnapped, which was when I realized I was in love with him.

"Wow," was all I could manage at that moment. I felt like crying, so I took a few seconds to breathe deep and pull myself together before speaking again.

"I can't believe you've opened up so much to me. It's wonderful, though I have to tell you I'm shocked. You always qualified your love with 'in my own way', so I never quite knew what that meant. You told me later your love didn't come with a ring, so I assumed it had meant you loved in me in a way that I couldn't understand."

Ranger snorted. "I don't know how to tell you this, but sometimes I lie. I felt that you wanted the Burg life with a little house and children and a husband who was home in time for dinner at exactly six o'clock each night. I figured you could have that Morelli, and while I knew it would hurt me if you did marry him, your happiness was more important."

I couldn't stop the tears that came after that pronouncement. I started sobbing into Ranger's chest, clutching his shirt to my face. I felt him wrap his arms around me tighter. In that moment, I felt like a horrible person, knowing that he had been considering my feelings much more than I had been considering his in the past. After a minute or two, I pulled it together and let go of Ranger's shirt. I looked up at him, and he shook his head like he couldn't believe what he had just witnessed.

"What?!" I asked.

"You're unbelievable. You have cars destroyed on a regular basis, you've been held at gunpoint, kidnapped, set on fire, locked in a coffin, nearly raped, been bombed and had your apartment broken into more times than any other place on the planet, yet you cry at stuff like this, and Mama Macaroni's funeral."

I glared at Ranger and punched him in the chest. "You're an asshole. You're lucky I love you, otherwise I'd kick you."

Ranger smiled and kissed me. "I'm a lucky man then."

He made to kiss me again, but I stopped him. "You do know that you've never actually told me you loved me without telling me it was in your own way before, right?"

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "I haven't?"

I shook my head.

He ran his fingers through my hair, brushing some of it back away from my face. His eyes met mine, and the moment felt incredibly intimate and romantic.

"I love you, Stephanie Plum, in every possible way."


	7. I Was Here

_A/N: Thanks for all of your reviews. They encourage me to continue writing. _

I found myself feeling very chipper over the next couple of days. Life was good. I was in a relationship with a great man who had finally told me he loved me without trying to diminish it in some way, I had a house of my own, and I hadn't had a car blow up for some time.

On Wednesday morning, I had just taken a shoplifter who had forgotten to go to court back to jail when my mother called me.

"Stephanie, I want you and Carlos to come to dinner tonight. What should I fix? I don't know what he would like."

I thought about it for a minute. Everything my mom cooked was higher in calories and fat content than Ranger's typical diet, so I didn't figure it would matter much what she cooked.

"I don't think it matters, Mom. He tends to eat healthy foods, so I think he'll have to break his normal routine no matter what you fix. But I need to check to see if he's available tonight before you do anything you wouldn't normally do," I said, thinking Ranger would probably have a reason for not going.

"He has to eat sometime," Mom replied. "It's not like I'm asking him to move in here. Now, what kind of dessert would he like?"

"He doesn't eat dessert, so just make whatever you want."

My mother sighed and hung up. I immediately dialed Ranger, so I could tell my mother whether to expect him or not.

"My mom wants us at dinner tonight. Can you make it?" I asked when he answered.

Ranger didn't say anything for a moment. "No."

"Why not?"

"There are plenty of reasons."

"Name one."

"I don't want to go."

"Not good enough. Try again."

Ranger sighed. "Babe, I'm not in the mood to have dinner with your family tonight. Your grandmother grabs my ass anytime I'm there, and your mother is only concerned with getting you married off."

Great, my family was scaring Ranger off three days into our relationship.

"Please, Ranger? I won't ask you to come much, but I do want you to come sometimes. This is the first time you'll have dinner with them since we became a couple. They'll be curious, but I've already warned my mother that marriage and children aren't to be pressed on us right now. And I'll be your bodyguard. Grandma will have to grab my ass before she gets to yours."

"Not tonight, Stephanie."

I knew he meant it when he used my full name. Ranger only used my full name when referring to me or when telling me something important. I felt disappointed that he couldn't give up an hour to have dinner with my family, but decided not to argue the point today. I was having a good day and didn't want to ruin it. We could talk about it another time.

"Fine, I'll let my mother know not to expect you. Talk to you later," I told him, and I hung up. I knew it was a little passive-aggressive, but I didn't much care at the moment. I'd been mature and adult quite a bit lately, so I felt a little bit of petulance was warranted.

My phone rang and the ringtone and display told me it was Ranger. I hit the 'ignore' button, and drove on to my next FTA's house, trying not to feel sorry for myself. I had to remind myself that Ranger wasn't Morelli; he wasn't social, he didn't conform to anyone's expectation other than his own, and he wasn't especially worn down by passive-aggressive guilt trips.

Tony Dorado was the next person on my FTA list. He had been charged with identity theft and resisting arrest. He had tried to write a check and use the ID of the husband of one of the store clerks at the mall, who immediately called the police. He had been in Abercrombie and Fitch when the police showed up and he threw a mannequin at the cops in an effort to get away. Dorado lived on Rosewood, which was a fairly busy street on the edge of the Burg. I parked the Camry in front of his house. I put my cuffs in my pocket for easy access and walked up to the house. It was a semi-detached two-story house similar to my parents, but a little smaller. I rang the doorbell and waited for Dorado to answer. After a minute, the door opened, revealing a Latino man about my height. He was wearing round-rimmed glasses, a plaid button-down shirt and jeans.

"Tony Dorado?"

"Si?"

"I'm Stephanie Plum, I work for your bail bondsman. You missed your court date, and you need to reschedule," I told him, watching his body language for the signs that he was planning to either make a run for it or attack me.

"No hablo íngles," he said, which I had learned from Ranger meant that someone didn't speak English.

Fantastic. I had called Ranger once before when I'd come across an FTA who only spoke Spanish, but I wasn't going to do that this time. I didn't want to be one of those women who called their boyfriend every time they couldn't do something. Not to mention I was a little mad at him.

"You need to come with me," I said slowly, pointing to him, then myself, then the car. Dorado shook his head.

"No." And then he slammed the door shut. I kicked the screen door, nearly putting my foot through it. I pulled out his file and read it over. Connie hadn't written anywhere about him not speaking English. I pulled out my phone and called the office.

"Why didn't you say Dorado doesn't speak English?" I asked when Connie answered.

"He does," Connie replied. "I was the one who bonded him out. He spoke perfect English. He didn't even have an accent. I believe he's second-generation American."

That rat bastard.

"Ugh, he acted like he didn't understand a word I was saying," I told Connie, who chuckled.

I hung up and went back to my car to regroup. Dorado was going to be more of a pain in the ass than I expected. I grabbed my pepper spray and was looking for my stun gun when I remembered that I'd never replaced it after York's dog had destroyed it. I dug around in my purse for another weapon and found my Mag light. I left my purse in the car, put my pepper spray in my pocket and went back to the house. This time, I opened the screen door and knocked on the inside door. I was going to get my foot in before he shut the door again, then cuff him.

Dorado didn't answer the door after three knocks, so I went around to the back yard. I peeked in a couple of windows along the way, but the curtains were drawn. When I got to the back of the house, I found Dorado standing in front of his grill. There was a fire going and he was shoving papers into it, likely destroying evidence of more identity theft. I tried to walk up behind him quietly, but he sensed me and took off around the other side of the house. I ran after him, yelling and swearing at him for acting like he didn't speak English. Dorado kept running and ran into the middle of the street, running out in front of a semi-truck, which slammed on its brakes and swerved in an effort to avoid hitting him. Dorado managed to dodge the truck, which ended up running into and over my Camry, crushing it. I heaved a big sigh, but continued running after Dorado. This wasn't my first lost car, and it wasn't likely to be my last.

I kept waiting for Ranger's call about my car being off the grid as I stalked through the neighborhood looking for Dorado, but it never came. I remembered after about five minutes that my phone was in the car, so there was no chance of getting through to me. I stopped in someone's back yard and sat down in one of their lawn chairs for a minute to catch my breath. Dorado had disappeared in one of the yards nearby, and I suspected he was hiding until he thought I was gone. I sat quietly for a few minutes, wondering if he would get brave and try to head home. I was right.

I'd been sitting about five minutes when Dorado came crawling out from behind a bush that divided two yards. He didn't notice me sitting in the chair, as it was behind his line of sight. I let him get towards the front of the house before I got up and started after him. He had just registered my presence when I tackled him, pinning him to the ground with my weight. I rolled him over, and for good measure, have him a knee in the balls.

"You acted like you didn't speak English, made me chase you around like an idiot and you got my car destroyed. I liked that car," I told him as he groaned and tried to curl up.

I let him lie there for a minute before pulling him to his feet and dragging him to the street. We'd managed to run down three blocks from his house, where I found the police, an ambulance, a fire truck and Ranger's Cayenne parked around the wreckage of my car and the semi. The driver seemed to have hit his head when he crashed, but was sitting up and talking. I didn't see a fire, luckily, so I hoped I would be able to get my purse from the car. It was a pain to try to get a new driver's license and credit cards, not to mention I had the body receipt from the shoplifter in my bag.

I saw Ranger speaking to Carl Costanza as I walked towards the wreckage. Ranger saw me and nodded in my direction, causing Carl to turn around.

"Wanna take him off my hands?" I asked Carl, indicating the limping Dorado. "But watch him, he tries to act like he doesn't speak English."

Carl put Dorado in the back of the squad car and gave me a body receipt. I turned around and found Ranger being handed my purse by one of the firemen.

"Good, I was hoping to get my bag back," I said as I approached Ranger. "I hate trying to get all new stuff."

Ranger handed my bag to me and a piece of paper. It was my copy of the police report regarding the accident. "Where do you want me to take you?" he asked, putting his hand on the small of my back and guiding me back to the Cayenne.

"The office. I need to turn in my body receipts, and then I can get Lula to drive me around to get the rest of my FTAs."

Ranger walked me around to the passenger side of the car, but before I could open the door, he spun me around, pinned me against the Cayenne. He cradled my head between his hands and kissed me. It was a gentle, but passion-filled kiss. He pulled back after a minute, leaving me a bit breathless.

"You had me scared for a few minutes, babe," he said, running his hands down my arms. "Normally when your cars blow up, I call you and you tell me you're fine and need a ride. When I kept trying to call you and didn't get any answer, I started to worry you'd been hurt. It was a minute or so after I got here before we determined you weren't trapped inside the car. You hadn't answered when I called you earlier, so I wasn't sure what you had been doing beforehand."

I told Ranger what happened with Dorado as we got in the car and headed for the office. I could tell something was going on with Ranger, but couldn't quite place it. He wasn't angry, but he was using his deadly calm mode as he drove, which meant he was controlling something serious inside him. It made me wonder just how worried he had been about me.

We pulled up in front of the bond's office and I made to get out of the car, but Ranger grabbed my wrist.

I turned to face him and saw an expression in his face that I hadn't seen come across his face before: sadness. He pulled me towards him and kissed me again, putting one hand on the back of my head, and the other on my back. His kiss felt needy and I felt like he was trying to tell me something with it. He pulled out of the kiss, but pressed his forehead against mine with his eyes closed. He stayed like this for a few moments, not speaking or breathing. He finally pulled away, and I found his normal calm expression back on his face.

"Be careful, babe," he said, releasing the last of his grip on me.

"Is there something you want to talk about?" I asked.

Ranger shook his head. "Not right now."

I nodded, got out of the car and walked into the office.

"We heard about your car on the police scanner," Lula informed me. "At least it didn't explode."

"It's totaled though," I told her, handing Connie my body receipts. "Someday I'm not going to find a company willing to give me insurance and I'll have to ride the bus to pick up my FTAs."

"I can't believe you haven't reached that point before now," Connie said, handing me a check. "You've gone through a ton of cars."

I took my check and debated about going after my other two FTAs, but found my heart wasn't in it any longer. The destruction of yet another car, coupled with Ranger's strange mood made me want to go home, put on my sweats, nuke some macaroni and cheese and watch the Game Show Network the rest of the day.

"Can you take me home?" I asked Lula.

"Sure, you done for the day?"

"Yeah, I am."

We stopped at Cluck-in-a-bucket, where I got chicken and a large Coke to accompany the macaroni and cheese I'd make at home. I waved goodbye to Lula and went in the house, going into the kitchen to get macaroni and cheese out of the fridge and putting it in the microwave. I ran upstairs to change clothes and got back to the kitchen in time for the ding of the microwave. I grabbed all of my food and settled in on the couch. Comfort food, comfort clothes and comfort television where the only things on the menu for the afternoon. It dawned on me that I had never called my mom to tell her Ranger wasn't coming to dinner, but I didn't want to deal with her at that moment. I was considering calling her and saying that neither of us could make it to dinner.

I was on my fourth episode of $25,000 Pyramid when the front door opened and Ranger came inside. He looked worn down, the look of sadness on his face again.

"Hey," I said, sitting up from where I'd been stretched out on the couch. I patted the couch next to me and he walked over, taking off his gun belt and putting it on the coffee table before sitting down.

Ranger put an arm around me and pulled me into him, wrapping both arms around me and resting his head on mine. I nuzzled into his chest, listening to his heartbeat. We sat like this for a full episode of Pyramid before Ranger spoke.

"Kinsey called me the other day to tell me that Amanda was pregnant. He was thrilled. This morning Amanda called me to say that Kinsey had a massive seizure today. The doctors discovered a brain tumor and he underwent surgery. He was in Intensive Care afterwards, but the prognosis didn't look good. He died an hour ago," he said, keeping me pulled tight into his chest as he spoke.

I was stunned. I had just seen them a few months ago when they were planning to get married and there was a threat against Ranger and Kinsey by a former Special Forces member. Kinsey had seemed in good health, and Amanda had been perfectly adorable and in love with him. I could picture Kinsey in my mind telling Ranger his good news, and Amanda glowing with joy. Now I felt sick at the knowledge that she would be a widow and single mother before her first wedding anniversary rolled around. Ranger and Kinsey had remained close in the years since they left the Army, as Kinsey had asked Ranger to be his best man in the wedding.

"I'm so sorry," I told him, tightening my arms around him. "I can't believe it. Poor Amanda."

Ranger sighed. "Yeah, I know. It seems impossible that we all survived Orin's tactics a few months ago, only for Kinsey to die this way. And my day was only made worse when I thought for a few minutes that you might be hurt or dead after your car got totaled. Today is one shitty day."

I agreed. I felt bad for moping around about my car now that I knew about Kinsey. I was about to ask if Kinsey's funeral would be around Trenton when my cell phone rang. I checked the display and saw it was my mom.

"You never did let me know if Carlos can make it to dinner tonight," she said. "I need to get it started soon, so I need to decide what to make."

"We can't make it tonight, Mom. We'll try again another night," I told her as I snuggled back against Ranger. I disconnected a minute later and pulled back so that I could look Ranger in the face.

"Let's make tonight our night to stay in and ignore the world. I think you need it today," I told him, running my fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes at my touch and was silent for a moment.

"Let me run back to the office to take care of a few things, pack a bag and tell Tank I'm offline until tomorrow morning," he said, kissing the inside of my wrist. He stood up, replaced his gun belt and left the house.

I sat on the couch for a while after he left, thinking about Amanda and how alone she must feel. I couldn't come close to putting myself in her position. I considered whether I should call to see if she needed anything, but refrained. I'd only met her during the wedding situation, and hadn't spoken to her since. I figured if there was anything I could do, Ranger would tell me.

I channeled surfed for a while and found the latest episode of _Downton Abbey_, at which I was yelling "You heartless bastards!" when the front door opened again.

I was surprised to see Ranger walk back in with a black duffle bag at four forty-five. I had figured I wouldn't see him until later that evening, but he'd apparently been serious about just doing a few things and checking out for the night. He took off his boots and left them at the door. His gun belt found a home on the sideboard and he put his duffle bag at the foot of the stairs.

"Who are the heartless bastards?" he asked, coming to sit next to me on the couch.

I explained _Downton Abbey_ to him and what had just happened in the episode I was watching.

Ranger rolled his eyes and shook his head at me. "Babe, that's a lot of emotion to invest in a television show."

I ignored him and watched the last few minutes of the episode, wiping away tears at a couple of sad parts. Ranger said nothing, though I could tell he thought I was a lunatic for crying over fictional people. Once the episode was over, I turned the television off and sat up to look at Ranger, who had been leaning back against the couch with his eyes closed.

"What should we do for dinner?" I asked him, leaning back against the couch and resting my head near his. "I can try to cook, or we can order in."

"It's your call, babe."

When he didn't comment further, I got up and went into the kitchen to see what I had available. I found a frozen chicken and noodle casserole in the freezer that my mother had sent over after I moved in. It still looked ok, so I put in the oven and looked around for something to serve with it. It had noodles, chicken and vegetables, so I thought bread and fruit would round out the food pyramid. Of course I only had white bread in the fridge and no fruit, so that plan meant I either needed to go to the market or do without. I debated for a moment before deciding I was going to need dessert if we were staying in after a particularly bad day. I told Ranger I was running to the market and asked if he needed anything specific. He didn't, so I went to the market and came back twenty minutes later with a loaf of French bread, some grapes, a bottle of wine and a cheesecake.

I checked on the casserole once I got back in the kitchen and put the groceries away. I could hear Ranger on his phone, so I set about getting out plates, utensils and napkins and setting the table to give him some privacy. He joined me in the kitchen a minute later.

"That was Amanda," he explained. "She was telling me that she thinks the funeral will likely be Saturday, but will know for certain tomorrow after she makes the arrangements. She's trying to find a different church to have it at, rather than the one where they got married. She also asked me to speak at the funeral."

"How's Amanda doing?" I asked as the timer went off on the casserole. I walked over to stove and pulled the dish out.

"As well as can be expected, I suppose. I think she's still in shock."

I put the casserole dish on the table, along with the bread, grapes and wine. "How are you doing?" I asked.

Ranger leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed in front of him. "I don't cultivate friendships much, but Kinsey was a good friend and has been for a long time. It's hard to reconcile that he just got married, called me two days ago to tell me he was going to be a father, and now he's dead."

We sat down at the table and ate our meal in silence. I watched Ranger as we ate, trying to see if I could assess what was going on in his mind. Even though he was sad about his friend, his demeanor was neutral and calm. I've always been jealous of his ability to keep his emotions off of his face. I tend to have my thoughts and feelings written all over my face.

Once we finished, Ranger helped me clear the table and load the dishwasher, and all the while I wondered what Ranger and I would do all night. I hadn't often had time to relax much with Ranger. The majority of our extended periods of time together had been spent having sex or working, so having a casual no-work-allowed evening with Ranger would be different. I had no doubt we'd end up having sex at some point, but I knew it wouldn't be all evening. I hadn't really considered before what Ranger and I would do on our nights together. Morelli and I would sometimes to go movies, out to dinner, dancing, a couple of concerts and bowling. I somehow couldn't see Ranger doing most of those things, and definitely not today after losing a friend. I kept myself busy wiping down counters, scrubbing the sink, sweeping the floor and straightening the kitchen to allow myself more time to think. Ranger had been watching me, not saying anything as he leaned against the island.

When I ran out of things to do, I turned to face Ranger. "You seem a little nervous, babe." he commented.

"Nah, just trying to make sure the kitchen is clean."

He cocked his head to the side and gave me a look that said he knew I was full of shit.

"Fine, I was trying to figure out what we'd do this evening. You're so mysterious to me still. I don't know what kinds of things you like to do when you have time away from work, other than get in my pants."

Ranger gave a small sigh. "Babe, you know me in the important ways. The other stuff will come in time."

I raised an eyebrow. "You make it sound like I have a long time to get to know you."

"You planning to get rid of me anytime soon?"

"No, if anything I figure you'll get sick of having to save my ass, or I'll drive you insane with my questions and you'll give me the boot," I told him, half-joking, half-serious.

Ranger stepped towards me, placing his hands on my hips. "Babe, I wouldn't have agreed to a relationship with you if I thought I'd end it over stupid shit like that."

"What would make you leave?" I asked him, curious to find out what his limits were.

Ranger looked at me for a full thirty seconds before answering. "If you asked me to leave."

"That's it? What about cheating? Pregnancy? Forcing you into a pink shirt?"

That got a smile out of Ranger. "You wouldn't cheat on me, I know that much. If you got pregnant, we'd manage it, and you'd have to kill me to get me into a pink shirt."

My jaw dropped at the pregnancy remark. I knew without a doubt that if I ever got pregnant by Ranger, he would step up to support his child, as he had done with Julie, but I figured he'd step away emotionally.

"Well," I said, feeling a lump in my throat. "That's good to know."


	8. Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 8

I didn't see much of Ranger over the next two days. He had been quiet the remainder of the evening Wednesday and had gotten up and dressed by five on Thursday morning. When I finally got up three hours later, I found a set of keys on the counter along with a note from Ranger that said I had a car in the garage, and that it was mine to keep until it got destroyed. I hunted down my remaining FTAs from Wednesday and picked up the files from Thursday, which had been a couple of regular druggies who were typically too stoned to remember they had a court date.

Ranger called me on Friday to say that Kinsey's funeral would be on Saturday at ten in the morning at the Lutheran Church in Hamilton Township. I was surprised, considering Amanda and Kinsey had been married in a Catholic Church. Ranger told me Kinsey wasn't Catholic, but he had agreed to get married in the Catholic Church for Amanda. He ended the call by telling me he'd pick me up at nine on Saturday morning, which had clinched it that I wouldn't see him until right before the funeral. I knew Amanda had asked him to speak at the funeral, so I wondered if he was trying to figure out what to say. I had a hard time imagining Ranger giving a speech in front of a large group of people. I was always amazed when he spoke in more than one sentence at a time.

I got up at seven on Saturday to allow myself plenty of time to get dressed. I showered and put on a black dress that I saved specifically for funerals. My make-up required more care to ensure that I didn't end up looking like a clown caught in the rain. I tended to fall apart at funerals regardless of whether I was close to, or even really knew, the deceased. I was ready to go by a quarter to nine, and decided to have a glass of wine before Ranger arrived to help mellow me out, which I hoped would keep me from completely falling apart during the funeral. I was considering a second glass when Ranger walked in the back door. He was wearing a black suit with a black dress shirt and black tie. He looked a little tired, but otherwise his normal sexy self.

"I'm ready to go," I told him, picking up my little black handbag and putting my wine glass in the sink. He took my hand and we walked out the back to the Turbo, which was parked behind my garage. We drove in silence to the church, which allowed me to wonder what Ranger would say in his eulogy of Kinsey. I hadn't known Kinsey well, but I had liked what I had known of him. My mind wandered over to Amanda, and I thought about whether she would continue to be the adorable person she was after such loss.

We arrived at the church by nine-thirty to find the lot nearly full. Ranger parked and turned off the car, but didn't move to get out. He continued to rest his hands on the wheel, and stared straight ahead for a moment. I unbuckled my seatbelt, but didn't make any move towards the door. I looked over at Ranger, placing my hand on his thigh.

"Are you OK?" I asked.

Ranger nodded, putting one of his hands on top of mine and squeezing it before pulling it up to his mouth to kiss it. He looked over at me and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Yeah, I'm just thinking about what I'll say. I'm not used to giving long speeches."

"No kidding. You've managed to condense a lot of meaning into just 'Babe', so I always find it odd to hear you say much more."

Ranger leaned over and pressed a quick kiss on my lips. "Babe," he said, making me chuckle. That "babe" seemed to be mixture of "I'm glad you understand me" and "Smart ass".

As we walked up to the church, Ranger put his hand on my back. I had noticed over the years that Ranger would find reasons to touch me, even if he didn't say anything or intend any sexual implications. He often times tucked my hair behind my ear, caressed my cheek, put a hand on my back, or simply held my hand. I wasn't sure if Ranger did it to bring himself some comfort in his isolated world, or if he tried to put meaning into the touch that he couldn't bring himself to say out loud.

There had been an hour before the funeral for people to pay their respects to Amanda and Kinsey's parents, so people were lined up in the front of the church to see the family. Ranger and I joined the line, which moved fairly quickly. Amanda looked pale and exhausted, far removed from the bubbly blonde I'd met a few months before. I wasn't sure how far along she was in her pregnancy, so I wasn't sure if her exhaustion was purely from the stress of losing her husband, or combined with morning sickness.

When we reached Amanda, she hugged Ranger and thanked him for all of his help. I wasn't sure what all he had done for the funeral, but I had no doubt he would have done anything needed in a final farewell to his friend. Ranger greeted Kinsey's parents and Amanda turned to me. She reached out to hug me as well, which I found surprising considering I barely knew her.

"Thank you for coming, Stephanie," she told me, her voice strained.

"Not at all," I replied. "How are you holding up? I can't imagine how difficult this has been on you."

Amanda shook her head. "It's been surreal. I still can't believe it happened. We've barely been married four months, I'm three months pregnant and now I'm a widow. I went for my first check-up yesterday with the obstetrician, and when the doctor walked in, she asked if I was excited for my first baby. I burst into tears and had to tell her about Robert. Is it wrong that I'm not excited about this baby right now?"

I nearly lost it as Amanda spoke. I felt sick, and had an overwhelming urge to take Amanda home and take care of her. She looked lost and alone, so I gave her a hug.

"No, it's not wrong. You're going through something horrible right now. You need to do whatever you need to do to get through the day. You'll start to feel better later on,'' I told her, not sure if I believed what I was saying, but hoped it gave her some comfort.

I moved on and greeted Mr. and Mrs. Kinsey, who looked as equally devastated as Amanda. Ranger led me away to a pew three rows from the front on the left side of the church. He led us to the end of the row near the wall.

"I need to be able to get out easily during the service," he stated as I went in the pew first and sat down leaving him enough room on the end.

We had been seated about ten minutes when Ranger was approached by two men in formal Army uniforms. Ranger stood to greet them, addressing a man about his height with blonde hair and green eyes as Hutchins and a Latino man as Garcia. They spoke for a minute about their disbelief at Kinsey's sudden death, and how they hadn't been able to make it out to the wedding because of a training routine. Ranger moved a little and turned around, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"This is my girlfriend, Stephanie Plum. This is Kevin Hutchins, and Julio Garcia. They served in the same unit with Kinsey and me in the Middle East," he stated.

I stood and greeted both men, receiving polite nods and firm handshakes in return. They ended up sitting in the same pew as us, Garcia to my immediate right and Hutchins on his other side. Garcia informed me that he and Hutchins had pursued a long-term career in the military after the unit they had been in was disbanded once Ranger and Kinsey set out to come back to civilian life. Garcia and Hutchins had remained Special Forces; they still served in the same unit together, and were also roommates. Something about the way Garcia talked about Hutchins made me wonder if there was more between them than just a friendship, but I didn't ask and he didn't tell.

The music started playing in the church as Amanda and Kinsey's parents greeted the last of the people in line and took their seats in the front row next to Amanda's parents. I already started to feel tears well up in my eyes, so I pulled tissues out of my purse to keep in hand. Ranger put a hand on my knee and squeezed, no doubt recalling how I once fell apart at the funeral of a woman I didn't even like. A minister introduced himself and acknowledged that he had known Robert Kinsey growing up, and that Mr. and Mrs. Kinsey still attended the same church. There were a couple of songs played and the obituary was read, citing Kinsey was survived by his wife, Amanda and their unborn child, his parents and a sister. I small sob escaped me at the mention of an unborn child. Ranger moved his arm to around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him, kissing my temple. I was trying really hard not to completely fall apart, but I suspected I would fail once Ranger started speaking.

Kinsey's sister spoke first, her voice breaking in how much she admired her older brother for the time he spent serving his country, the success he had achieved in business and for finding such an amazing wife in Amanda. I kept a hand over my mouth to help prevent myself from bursting into full-blown sobs.

"Just take some deep breaths," Ranger whispered into my ear. "Count to five in and count to five out."

I did as he instructed and found I was able to keep it together a little better, as I had to focus on my breathing instead of the funeral. The next speaker had been a friend of Kinsey's from childhood, who spoke about the times in their teenage years when Kinsey had kept him on the straight and narrow, thus helping him avoid time in juvie, and potentially prison as an adult.

The minister then announced that one of Robert's friends and former Army comrades, Carlos Manoso, would be the next speaker. Ranger stood, patting me on the back. He walked up to altar and stood behind the podium, adjusting the microphone from where the shorter people had positioned it.

"When Robert and I were serving together in the Army, we lived our lives in the moment. When you're in dangerous situations for four years, you never know what to expect, and you don't plan for the next day with the anticipation that you will be around to see it. We both had some trouble readjusting to being civilians in the sense of trying to establish any permanence in our lives. When Robert asked me to be best man at his wedding earlier this year, I realized he had finally been able to move past the habits of not committing to anything or anyone out of fear that you wouldn't be there the next day. When he spoke of Amanda, he described her as the 'light in his life that he'd been trying to find for the past eight years'. When I learned of his death, I was stunned by the fact that of all we had been through together, a brain tumor would be what brought his life to an end so suddenly, and at what should be one of the happiest times in his and Amanda's lives. Robert Kinsey was a man of loyalty, strength and bravery. I trusted him not only with my own life, but with the lives of those I love. We had made an agreement years ago after the birth of my daughter that if anything ever happened to one of us, we would be sure to look out for the other's family. That agreement had carried over after our time in the Army, and when Robert called me two days before his death to tell me he and Amanda were expecting a baby, we reaffirmed it, though not expecting that it would ever been needed. I'm grateful to have been able to count Robert Kinsey as a friend in this life. I hope he has found peace in the next life with the knowledge that he made a difference in the lives of those who knew him, and that Amanda can find comfort in knowing that part of Robert will live in on in their child. Robert's life and death should remind us all that we need to embrace what's important in life at this moment, not letting it pass us by just because we're afraid of what the future might hold."

I had managed to keep myself together during Ranger's speech by simply forgetting to breathe. I was amazed at his composure. I hadn't been able to take my eyes off of him as he spoke, and noticed that he looked at me when he talked about trusting Kinsey with the lives of those he loved. He walked back to his seat next to me as the minister took the pulpit to begin his sermon. Ranger sat next to me, and I squeezed his hand reassuringly. He never met my gaze, but looked forward at the pulpit. I noticed he was doing his own deep breathing exercises, and that there was an unusual brightness to his eyes.

He continued to hold my hand throughout the last twenty minutes of the service and as we made our way out to the car. A small flag had been placed on the hood, indicating that we were part of the caravan that would drive to the cemetery. We rode to the cemetery in silence, and Ranger and I stood at the back of the group at the graveside, likely because Ranger didn't want my blubbering to cause a scene. He had an arm around me and I rested my head on his shoulder, getting his suit wet with my tears, but managing to keep the sobs quiet. A twenty-one gun salute rang through the air before we all departed, leaving the family to say their final goodbyes in peace.

As we walked between the graves, Ranger laced his fingers in with mine.

"I love you, Stephanie. I should tell you that more often."

His words had startled me, since he hadn't spoken directly to me for nearly an hour. I looked up at him, but he was focused on the path ahead of us, his expression serious as we reached the car. Once we were both in the car, I put my hand on his cheek.

"I know you do. Even if you don't say it, you've showed it to me in ways I never imagined possible through your touch and the lengths you've gone to keep me safe over the years, especially with Abruzzi's death."

Ranger looked at me, giving nothing away. "Abruzzi committed suicide."

"Abruzzi committed suicide when he kidnapped me."

"How long have you known?"

"Since it happened," I told Ranger. "When Morelli got the call that Abruzzi had been found in his car, we both knew what really happened, though we didn't actually say it."

Ranger turned his attention to the road as he started to drive, following other cars out of the cemetery. We didn't talk anymore as he drove through Trenton to my house. Kids were out of school and playing in parks, hanging out at the pool and walking to their friends' houses. It always seemed odd to see people going about their normal routines and enjoying their lives whenever someone had died.

When we arrived at my house, Ranger grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. He didn't stop at the door, but continued to pull me upstairs to the bedroom. Once inside, he pulled me against him and kissed me. The kiss was aggressive and full of emotion, and Ranger had started unzipping my dress as soon as our lips met. He pulled me out of it, leaving the dress in a pool at my feet. He unhooked my bra and threw it aside. I started working on his tie, loosening the knot and pulled it from his neck before pushing his jacket off his shoulders. Ranger seemed impatient as he pulled his off shirt, kicked off his shoes and removed the gun from the small of his back. I was left standing in my panties and high heels while he finished stripping down. Once he was naked, he pushed me onto my bed and kissed me again with the same force and fierceness as a minute before. He moved down my body with his mouth, removing my panties and heels before sliding inside me.

I'd had sex with Ranger many times, but this time was in a class of its own. I could sense his overwhelming emotions as he kissed me and moved inside me, trying to find that particular spot that would bring me to an orgasm with him. He was rough—not painfully so—but atypical for Ranger. He tended to fall more into the 'making love' category. I was so distracted by trying to figure out Ranger's intense emotions that I knew I wouldn't be getting any satisfaction out of this round. I gave it another minute or so before clenching my muscles around him, groaning and closing my eyes. I heard Ranger moan as well, and he laid his head on my bare shoulder, his breathing ragged. I ran my fingers through Ranger's hair, gently scratching his head with my nails. He didn't move, but laid there trying to get his breathing back to normal while I pretended I didn't feel the wetness on my shoulder where he rested his eyes.

After a couple of minutes Ranger rolled over, pulling me with him. He nestled my head under his chin and wrapped his arms around me. We laid there for about fifteen minutes before Ranger moved to get out of bed. He sat on the edge of the bed with his back to me, but didn't get up right away. I admired his muscular back while wondering what he planned to do next. I started to reach out to him, but before I got to him, he stood up and started getting dressed. He replaced his gun in the small of his back and pulled on his jacket last. He hadn't looked at me the entire time he was getting dressed, and it had made me feel a bit like a one-night stand, similar to the first night we'd slept together. Ranger was typically a paragon of calm and rational emotions, but at that moment he felt like a big mess, though to an outsider he would still look relatively calm and collected.

"Where are you going?"

"To work," Ranger replied, and turned to leave. I jumped up out of bed, not caring that I was naked.

"Whoa, hold on," I said, running towards him and almost knocking him down the stairs when he stopped abruptly.

"What's going on? I know you're upset because of Kinsey, but I feel like there's more than that. You just got up and dressed without saying goodbye like I was some one-night stand."

Ranger turned around and kissed me briefly.

"Bye, babe," he said, leaving without an explanation.

"This isn't over!" I yelled at him as he disappeared downstairs. I heard the back door open and shut a few seconds later.

I paced for a few minutes before going back to my room to get dressed in a summer dress and flats. I pulled my hair back in a ponytail, since I had very obvious sex hair, and switched out my purse again. I wanted to get out of the house and burn off some of my energy. Ranger's emotions were foreign to me, and I was finding it was hard to handle them. Morelli had been more transparent about his emotions: when he had been angry, he gestured a lot and swore, when he was hurt he played basketball with his cousins, and when he was happy, he wanted wild-gorilla sex. Ranger was much more complex and difficult to understand. Most men didn't like to talk about their feelings, but he was beyond even that.

I went downstairs and headed towards the car, but had no idea where I would go. The bond's office was closed by now and I didn't really want to visit my parents, so I decided to head to Point Pleasant. I could walk along the boardwalk, eat junk food and enjoy the sea air, which was a pretty perfect way to spend the afternoon of an emotionally-charged day.

It was eight in the evening by the time I got home. I had stopped at the grocery store on the way back from Point Pleasant and was putting my groceries away when my phone buzzed with a text message. It was from Morelli, asking if I had happened to come across his favorite t-shirt and an extra set of his keys. I responded that I had a box of his stuff, and that both of those things were in the box. I told him he could stop by my house to get the box whenever he was in town next and gave him my address. I realized as I finished putting my food away that I missed Morelli. Not in a romantic sense, but as a friend. I hadn't considered when we were together that we were friends on top of being lovers, but I had the feeling we could never get that friendship truly back, considering our history. I also thought Ranger wouldn't be a fan of Morelli hanging out at my house, drinking a beer and watching a football game, especially since Morelli's favorite half-time activity was a quickie.

I stayed up until ten that night, watching television and waiting to see if Ranger would be back over. I eventually trudged upstairs alone, thinking that I would light a candle for each Amanda and Ranger tomorrow at Mass. I remembered Ranger telling me at Kinsey and Amanda's wedding rehearsal that he didn't get to go to church as often as he would like to, which had surprised me. He never seemed like the type of person who would follow a doctrine, but I began to wonder if a spiritual side was the only thing that had kept him sane during dark times.

I woke up a seven the next morning to the sound of my alarm. I went to roll over to hit the alarm, but found Ranger in bed with me and he already had his hand on the alarm, hitting the off button.

"Hey, when did you get here?" I asked him, rolling over to face him.

"A little after midnight."

I quickly assessed his mood and found it to be more normal. Well, normal for Ranger.

"Do you want to talk about yesterday?" I asked, trying to make it clear that we would talk about it, but that I didn't demand it be first thing in the morning.

"I don't want to talk about it, but I feel I owe you an explanation," he replied. "Kinsey's funeral got to me more than I had thought it would, but what else bothered me was your comment yesterday in the car about Abruzzi. We've never really talked about his death, and when you were talking to me about it and saying that you knew I did it because I loved you, it bothered me. I try to keep you away from the darker parts of my past, and to have them meet like that was disconcerting. It makes me wonder how you could be with me, knowing some of what I've done."

I had expected the part about Kinsey's funeral, but not with regards to my comments about Abruzzi. I hadn't considered that being reminded of killing someone would upset him, but now that I looked back, I felt like an idiot.

"I didn't mean to upset you," I told him. "I just wanted you to know that I know you love me, even when you don't say it. And I know you have a lot of stuff in your past that weighs on you, but you did what you needed to do to keep me safe. I know without a doubt that Abruzzi would have killed me, or had me killed, eventually. You saved me, and that's all that matters."


	9. Justify My Love

A/N: Thanks to all of my readers for the wonderful reviews.

My discussion with Ranger about the Abruzzi situation seemed to have broken down one of the emotional barriers that stood between us. I knew he would never tell me all of the things he had done in his life, and I didn't want him to, but we had made some progress.

Ranger had told me that Wednesdays would be the best the night for our 'date night', as that tended to be the slow day at Rangeman. The previous Wednesday had been awful with the news of Kinsey's death, so I decided I wanted our first official Wednesday night date night to be very different.

I was in the kitchen feeding Rex some hamster nuggets when Ranger walked in the back door carrying his black duffle bag and a black garment bag, which I assumed was carrying one of his suits. I'd told him to bring some stuff over to leave at my house, since he seemed to be spending about three nights a week at my place, and it seemed silly that he had to go back to Rangemen to get ready. I gave him a quick kiss as he walked through the kitchen, and I heard him go upstairs to put his stuff away. When he came down to the living room five minutes later, I had my proposal all ready.

"I was thinking we should go out tonight," I told Ranger as he sat down on the couch next to me. "I'm thinking dinner and a movie."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "A movie? At home or at the theatre?"

"The theatre. Have you ever been to a movie theatre before?" I asked, smiling a little. It was so hard to imagine Ranger doing 'normal' things unless I had witnessed them for myself.

Ranger rolled his eyes. "Of course I have."

"When was the last time?"

Ranger thought for a beat. "I think I went on a date in college and we went to the movies."

"What did you see?"

"I can't remember. I just remember sitting there planning how I was going to get her pants."

I smack him on the arm. "You're a pig. Anyway, the movie I want to see is about that hostage situation at the US Embassy in Iran, and how the US government got some of the people out of the country. You should like that. I'm sure you've probably done stuff like before."

"I've never done an ex-fil. The CIA does that stuff," Ranger replied.

"What's an ex-fil?" I asked, thinking it sounded like a dumping grounded for the bodies of cheating spouses.

"Exfiltrate. It's the opposite of an infiltrate—instead of trying to get in somewhere, you're trying to get out."

Duh.

"Oh, ok. So what do you think? Can we go? And this time, you won't have to be distracted by trying to figure out how you'll get into your date's pants later, since it's a guarantee you will."

Ranger considered me for a moment. "OK, since you made the offer so appealing…"

We made it back home by nine that evening after pizza at Pino's and the movie at the Multiplex. Ranger had seemed to enjoy our date, as much as I could tell given his usual lack of emotional expression. He had watched the movie intently, though every now and then his hand would make its way up my thigh, causing me to suck in some air, which got a smile out of him.

We had just walked in the door when I heard his phone buzzing. I gave him the 'don't-even-think-of-answering-that-phone' look as he checked the display.

"It's most likely Julie," he said as he answered the call.

I nodded that I understood and headed upstairs to get into my pajamas. He hadn't spoken to Julie as far as I was aware since we'd been a couple, and I wondered if he would break the news to her. I went back downstairs a few minutes later to find Ranger still on the phone. I peeked around the corner of the stairwell at him, watching his expression while he listened to Julie and occasionally gave a one or two word response. He stared straight ahead and had a small, but affectionately amused smile on his face. It made me wonder if Ranger was enjoying his closer bond with Julie these days. He had told me before that he'd kept himself emotionally distanced, but I never knew if it was more of his own choice, or at Rachel's insistence.

"No, I'm not working right now. I'm at Stephanie's house," he told her. "I took your advice."

Ranger answered in the affirmative to whatever Julie asked, and subsequently held the phone a little away from his ear, chuckling. I took it Julie approved of our relationship.

I decided to stop spying at that point and walked out from around the staircase and went to the kitchen for a drink. A minute later, Ranger walked in the kitchen, still on the phone.

"Julie wants to say hi," he told me handing me his phone.

I took it and said "Hi, Julie."

"Hi, Stephanie," she replied brightly. "I'm so glad you're Ranger's girlfriend now. I've been telling him for forever that he needed to make you his girlfriend, but he always gave some excuse about you dating that cop. I'm glad you ended it with him, and went with my dad. You need to come with him next time he's in Miami for a visit."

I had taken notice of Julie's reference to Ranger as her 'dad'. When we'd been kidnapped, she'd referred to him as her father, but to her step-father as her dad. I could tell Julie's emotional investment in the relationship had deepened.

"Maybe," I told her, not wanting to make any sort of promise without talking to Ranger. I wasn't sure if he would be comfortable taking me along for a visit, or if Rachel and Ron would want me to come. I'd never actually met them when they came up to get Julie after the kidnapping.

"Don't worry, my mom and dad would love to meet you," she told me. Geez, Ranger's mind-reading skills must be genetic.

"That's great to know," I told her, still not wanting to commit in case Ranger wasn't as gung-ho about me meeting the Martines as they might be. "How are you doing? I haven't seen you since, well…"

"We were kidnapped in your apartment," Julie finished, not sounding upset. "I've been good. My mom and dad don't let me walk home from school anymore, and it was forever before I was allowed to spend a night away from them, but things are more normal now."

"I'm glad to hear that," I told her as I heard my own phone start buzzing away on the counter. "I'll give you back to Ranger, my phone is ringing. It was great talking to you."

"You too. Bye, Stephanie," she said brightly. I handed Ranger his phone and picked up mine. The display told me it was Connie.

"Stephanie, I've had ten phone calls this evening from people saying they saw you and Ranger on a date at Pino's, and then at the Multiplex. I wasn't sure if you've told your family yet, so I wanted to give you a head's up."

"Thanks,I told them last week, but it's nice to know the Burg gossip hotline is in working order. Yeah, we went out tonight."

Connie chuckled. "I can't believe he goes to the movies. That's so…normal."

"It was his first trip to one in over a decade that didn't involve leading someone out in handcuffs," I told Connie.

"You mean he didn't handcuff you?" Connie asked.

"Not yet."

Connie chuckled and disconnected. I turned to find Ranger was off the phone and watching me. I shrugged. "The gossip line had us at the movies tonight, and Connie wondered if it was true."

Ranger shook his head. "It's a hazard of having Burg connections."

"I'm glad I got to talk to Julie for a minute. She sounds like she's doing well."

Ranger nodded. "She's made an excellent psychological recovery from the kidnapping. Everyone was amazed at how strong she's been about the whole situation."

I wrapped my arms around Ranger and rested my head on his chest. "She gets that from you, along with other traits. I remember once I kicked Scrog in the head, and after I regained consciousness from being stun gunned she looked over at me said 'Good one', and when he brought us food the next morning that he stolen from the convenience store he robbed, she chose raisins and peanuts over candy bars and donuts. And then, of course, she tackled Scrog and shot him. When you were being taken out of my apartment and down to the ambulance, she was holding onto the gurney and when someone tried to stop her, she smacked their hand and said 'He's my father, and I'm going with him'. I probably shouldn't say this about a little girl, but she's real badass.

Ranger chuckled. "Tank told me a similar story, only he had tried to stop her from getting in the ambulance and had wanted her to ride in the SUV with him. She told him she'd already shot one man that night, and she'd do it again if he tried to stop her. He was impressed, even if it was an empty threat."

I burst into laughter, picturing the exchange perfectly in my mind. "Wow, like I said. A real badass, just like her father."

The following Saturday ended up being the first dinner Ranger and I had with my family since we became a couple. I had given my mother the 'no marriage or babies' talk again Saturday afternoon while Ranger was working a patrol. She'd begrudgingly agreed, though adding that she didn't understand why it was such a no-go area if we were in love.

I arrived my parents' house at five minutes to six and went inside. Ranger had said he would have to be a few minutes late, as the patrol shift he was working wasn't over until six.

"Where's Carlos?" my mother asked when she saw me alone.

"He'll be a few minutes late. He had to pick up a shift for someone who called off, and it doesn't end until six."

The table was laid out with baked chicken, roasted potatoes, green beans, red wine and bread. Not too far outside of Ranger's normal caloric intake. I knew he wouldn't eat the chocolate cake my mom had made for dessert, so I had already prepared myself to eat his portion.

Ranger arrived about five minutes after six, in which time we had just started serving ourselves.

"Hello, Carlos," my mother said warmly. "I'm glad you could make it."

Ranger nodded. "I'm sorry to be late, but I had to cover for someone."

"Of course, you're the boss. If you want your business to be successful, sometimes you have to do that," Mom said, which earned her a raised eyebrow from me. Was she sucking up now in order to try to slip in a marriage question later?

Ranger said nothing as he started serving himself. Once he had his food on his plate, he squeezed my knee before he started eating. I took the gesture as meaning "I'll try not to shoot your mother this evening, but I can't promise anything".

Throughout dinner, my mother asked questions about Ranger's background in the Army and his family, which I had already told her, but she wanted to hear it directly from the man himself. When Ranger mentioned his daughter in Miami, my mother's eyes lit up like she'd won a prize. I could she saw this as an opening to a question about children, but before I could change the subject she had already asked her question.

"Do you want more children, Carlos?"

I let out a heavy sigh, which my mother ignored.

"I haven't considered it much in the past few years while I've been building my business," he responded, finishing the wine in his glass. Poor Ranger. I imagined by this point he was thinking more fondly of the three days he spent being tortured by Columbian rebels than he was of this dinner.

"Of course, but now that you've become so successful, maybe a family isn't too far in the future?"

I rolled my eyes, not caring who saw at that point. "Mom, please stop. We've only been together two weeks. Let's not scare him away."

"Yeah, Helen. They need several years of hot sex before they start thinking about kids," Grandma piped up, making me cough while I was taking a bite of potatoes and making my dad drop his fork mid-air. Ranger patted me on the back, and I took a sip of wine to help swallow. My dad looked incredibly uncomfortable with the topic of conversation, but managed to pick his fork up again and resumed his meal.

Ranger and I made it out of dinner an hour later, during which time I had eaten both of our portions of cake. Grandma had made a grab for Ranger's ass as we headed out the door, but I'd been purposely standing between them so it was my ass that got grabbed instead.

"Hm, not as firm as I remember," she commented, not realizing her mistake.

"That's my butt," I told her.

"Oh, sorry Steph," Grandma said, but not releasing her grip. "But you know, if you want Carlos to stay interested, you might need to tighten that thing up a little."

I pulled myself out of Grandma's grip. "We'll talk to you later," I said, pushing Ranger out the door.

As we walked to our respective vehicles in the driveway, Ranger put an arm around my waist and pulled me close. "I love your ass the way it is," he told me, giving me a kiss above my ear.

"That's good because I don't intend to start exercising just to keep my ass tight."

Ranger chuckled. "I need to go back to the office and do some paperwork, but I'll be over later."

As I was driving home, my phone buzzed with a text from Morelli, who said he was in town tonight and could he stop for his stuff. I sent him a quick message back while I waited on a stoplight, telling him I'd be home for the evening, so he could stop by whenever he wanted.

A couple of hours later, I was in my living room watching _Cake Boss_ when the door bell rang. I walked over to the door and looked through the small glass cut out. It was Morelli.

I opened the door and Bob leaped up on me, knocking me on my butt. "Bob!" I cried out, laughing as he licked me.

Bob lost interest after a few seconds and ran further into the house, sniffing the ground. Morelli helped me up and shut the door behind him as he stepped inside.

"Happy housewarming, Steph," he said, handing me a square bakery box. I peeked inside to see a birthday cake with blue and yellow roses, the words "Happy Birthday, Tina" written in blue icing.

"Thanks! One of the best yet," I told him, walking into the living room. I set the box down on the coffee table and opened it up, picking off the roses with my fingers and eating them. There wasn't much better than frosting off a birthday cake. I looked around to see that Morelli was in the kitchen, ushering Bob out, who had been trying to get into the trash. He handed me a fork before he sat down in the chair next to me. He'd also grabbed himself a beer.

"Make yourself at home," I told him jokingly as I started in on my cake.

Morelli snorted, opening his beer and taking a swig. "How's life?"

I nodded. "It's great. I love my house, work is going great and I'm even thinking of learning how to cook. I'm growing up."

Morelli smiled. "I never thought I'd see the day you started morphing into a domestic goddess."

I shook my fork at him. "I'm nowhere near goddess level at this point. I'm not even qualified to use my name and 'domestic' in the same paragraph yet."

Bob jumped up on the couch and curled up in a ball next to me. I used my free hand to pet him as I continued to eat the cake right out of the box. I was beginning to think I had a problem with cake and wondered if there were Cake Eaters Anonymous meetings I could go to.

"Are you liking Camden and your new job?" I asked, trying to avoid any awkward silence. I wasn't sure if Morelli had heard about my relationship with Ranger yet via his mother and the Burg gossip hotline, so I thought I'd talk around it for as long as possible.

Morelli took a long drag of beer. "Yeah, it's not bad. I'm doing a lot of work with informants and managing the undercover officers, then doing the big busts and what-not. It's not much different from what I was doing here, only it's focused solely on the gangs. Camden's a little smaller than Trenton, but I'm working a lot more. Crime is through the roof."

"Are you seeing anyone?" he asked after a moment's pause.

I gave him a 'don't-play-dumb-I-know-you-know' look as I took a big bite of birthday cake. Morelli nodded.

"So the rumors are true. I believe I told you so."

I swallowed my birthday cake. "Yes, you were right."

"I'm glad you're happy," Morelli said seriously.

"Have you started seeing anyone?"

Morelli shook his head. "I've not been there long enough to meet anyone, not to mention I've been so swamped with work, I haven't seen many people outside of gang members and cops."

"The women will find you," I told him. "After all, you're Joe Morelli."

Morelli raised his beer in a mock toast when I heard the front door open and shut. Ranger appeared in the foyer a moment later. Bob jumped off the couch and went flying at Ranger, who absorbed the impact and scratched Bob behind the ears.

'Morelli," he said, as Bob returned to the floor and came back to the couch.

"Ranger."

They stared at each other for a minute, neither moving a muscle. I kept eating my birthday cake, hoping a shoot out wasn't going to break out in my new living room.

"Joe brought me a happy housewarming birthday cake," I told him, pointing at the box where I'd gone through a quarter of the cake already. Ranger took off his gun belt and put it on the sideboard where I put my keys and mail. I knew he still had a second piece and a knife under his clothes, so he wasn't completely unarmed.

He peeked inside the box and shook his head. "You just had two pieces of cake at your mom's, and now you're eating this straight out of the box? I guess I should be thankful you had enough restraint to stop for a fork."

Morelli snorted. "Actually, I got her the fork. She was using her fingers in the beginning."

Ranger chuckled as he walked into the kitchen to get his own beer. He returned to living room, pulling the top off the bottle and sat down on the other side of Bob on the couch.

"How's Camden?" Ranger asked Morelli, scratching Bob behind the ears. Bob laid his head in Ranger's lap and closed his eyes. Dogs loved Ranger.

"Not bad, considering what a hell-hole it is in terms of crime. But it could be worse, like Newark."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Don't hate on Newark. That's my hometown."

I rolled my eyes at Ranger. "Newark is a complete hell-hole. How can you say it isn't?"

"It's not a complete hell-hole; it's only ninety-eight percent hell-hole."

"Oh, that's all?"

I took another bite of cake and realized I had eaten nearly half the cake.

"Oh boy," I said, feeling a little gluttonous. "I think I overdid it."

Ranger pried the fork out of my hand put the lid back on the cake box. "No, don't throw it away!" I cried, trying to take the box back.

Ranger held my gaze for a minute. "I'm putting it in the kitchen, babe. You're done for now. I don't need you puking all over me later."

I blushed slightly at Ranger's reference to our night's activities together in front of Morelli, but brushed crumbs off my shirt to avoid looking up. Morelli stood up and grabbed Bob's leash.

"We need to get going. We're driving back to Camden tonight. Do you have that box you mentioned?" he asked, not quite meeting my gaze.

"Yeah, I'll get it," I said, turning to head towards the stairs. The movement made my stomach twist in knots. I moaned out loud and held my stomach.

Ranger shook his head in disgust. "I know where it is. I'll go get it." He disappeared upstairs and came down a minute later with the box of Morelli's stuff that had been in the spare room. Morelli took the box in the arm that wasn't holding on to Bob's leash.

"Thanks," he told Ranger, shifting the box under his arm. "You guys take care, and I'll see ya around sometime. Give me a call if you're ever in Camden."

I waved bye to Morelli and Bob from the door and returned to the living room, where Ranger was standing, watching me as I locked the door and set the alarm.

"What?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips.

"Nothing. I was just watching you to see if you were going to be sick. You ate half a birthday cake by yourself. You need help."

Oh, I thought he'd been pissed to see Morelli here. "Sorry, I thought you might be angry about Joe showing up."

Ranger tilted his head slightly. "Babe, I trust you. Morelli not so much, but he knows if he ever tried anything, no one would find his body."

No doubts there.

I picked up Morelli's empty beer bottle and took it in the kitchen to throw away. I went to put my fork in the dishwasher when I realized there was still frosting on it. I ate the frosting, which made me decide that I wanted just one more bite of cake before I went to bed. Ranger walked into the kitchen just as I put a bite my mouth. I gave him sheepish look as I slowly pulled the fork out of my mouth, and chewed the cake.

"Babe."

I groaned. "I know. I'm a cake- addict. Are you sure you don't want any? The sooner it's gone, the sooner I can start the road to recovery."

Ranger gave small smile as I offered him my fork. "There's only one way I'm interested in eating that cake, and it doesn't involve using a fork."

He ran a finger through the frosting then spread the frosting along my neck.

Oh boy, I liked where this was going.

Ranger bent his head and licked the frosting off my neck, making me moan and nearly collapse.

He grabbed the cake box in one hand, my hand in the other and took us both upstairs.

Ranger had me out of my clothes in record time. He pulled the comforter off the bed and laid me down on top of the flat sheet. He undressed himself and climbed onto the bed and put the cake box on the bedside table. He ran his index and middle fingers through the frosting, and then spread it on my throat and chest to my breasts, putting a little dollop on each nipple. Then, with the agonizingly slow pace he used when he really wanted to torment me, he licked and sucked and kissed the frosting from my body. I was writhing with pleasure and frustration by the time he finished.

"Not done yet, babe," he said, gathering more frosting. This time, he spread it along the insides of my thighs and then to my..., well somewhere I certainly never imagined cake frosting going. I nearly fainted from the touch alone. He slowly licked each thigh, biting me gently enough to make me moan. When he finally reach the spot I'd been aching for him to get to, it took almost no time for me to have a mind-blowing orgasm. It was probably the hottest sex I'd ever had with Ranger, which was saying something.

My two favorite things had just been combined into one experience: Ranger-sex and birthday cake.

I was surprised to still find Ranger asleep when I woke up at seven the next morning. He was usually up at five to work out and eat breakfast before starting his day. I guess a night of sex and birthday cake warrants sleeping in. I put my sweats back on and took the cake downstairs. I started the coffee and looked in the cake box. Most of the frosting had been cleaned off, so I left it in the kitchen and took my coffee to the living room to watching the _Today Show. _ I'd only had about four sips of coffee when the doorbell rang. I looked out the window and saw Lula standing on my front step. It was working out to be a weird day. Lula was up early and Ranger was sleeping in. The _Today Show _hadn't said anything about Hell freezing over.

"Hey girl," Lula said as I let her in. "There's big sale going on at that outlet mall in Newark. They have purses, shoes and dresses up to seventy-five percent off. Wanna go?"

Newark, Hell, same difference.

"I need to take a shower first. I can be ready to go in a half hour," I told her, opening the door so she could come inside.

"You smell like a cake," Lula said as she walked past me. Ranger was coming downstairs fully dressed as Lula and I headed towards the living room. He must have heard the comment because I saw him smile briefly.

"Lula and I are going shopping at the outlet mall in Newark," I told him.

Ranger went to the kitchen and grabbed a to-go mug for coffee. "Have fun."

Lula followed us into the kitchen. "I thought you got up at the crack of dawn to hunt down bad guys?" she asked Ranger as he poured his coffee. She opened the cake box and looked inside. "Where's all the icing on your cake? You've only eaten half the cake, but all of the icing is gone."

"Ranger ate it," I told her. "That's probably why he slept late today. His 'temple' couldn't tolerate the refined sugar."

Lula had been looking between me and Ranger, a slow smile spreading across her face. "I bet he ate that icing real good, too. I've always suspected he was a good icing eater. That must be why you smell like a cake, and have that ridiculous smile on your face this morning.

Ranger smiled and headed out of the kitchen, stopping to kiss me. "One of my men is supposed to be getting engaged this evening, and I have a feeling he'll be calling off his shift to celebrate, so I'll likely be covering for him."

"Maybe you should send him a congratulations cake," Lula sniggered as we followed Ranger out of the kitchen. "Where did you get this one? Tasty Pastry?"

Ranger stopped to put on his utility belt and grab his keys, and I headed towards the door to show him out.

"I don't know," I told her. "Morelli dropped it off to me yesterday as a housewarming present."

Lula burst into laughter. "Oh shit, that's about the funniest thing I've heard all week. Have you told him how you enjoyed your cake?"

Ranger grinned. "Maybe I should give him a call and thank him."

I punched Ranger in the arm. "Do _not_ call Morelli. That would be awful."

I showed Ranger out and ran upstairs to shower and dress. I looked in the mirror in the bathroom and realized I did look ridiculously happy. Geez, birthday cake sex with Ranger worked better than caffeine or any happy pill ever could. I was back downstairs, and we were on the road to Newark thirty minutes later with Lula's rap music blaring out of the speakers. The outlet mall was in chaos by the time we got there an hour later. Women were fighting with each other over the last Donna Karan dress, pulling on it until it split down the seam.

Lula patted her purse. "I'm glad I've got my gun on me. I don't want to have to fight some crazy lady over a dress. She'll just hand it right over to me."

I rolled my eyes. "If you get arrested, I'll deny knowing you."

We hit the Coach outlet first, pushing our way through the crowd to see if anything had been left behind. I was checking out a new wallet when my cell phone rang. It was Ranger.

"Do you have plans for next weekend?" Ranger asked when I answered.

"Nope. Why?"

"My sister Celia just called me to say she's having a party for my parents' fortieth wedding anniversary, and that my attendance is mandatory. She wants me to come up Friday night for a family dinner and to spend the night in Newark so I can be there for the party on Saturday. Would you come with me?"

I nearly fell over. "You want me to meet your family?"

"You're my girlfriend, unless something's changed since I left this morning. Meeting the family is part of the deal, especially since I've had to sit through family dinners with yours."

I smiled. "Yes, but I know you and how private you are. I wasn't sure if you'd want them to know you were seeing anyone."

"Are you coming or not? Celia nearly burst my eardrum when I told her I needed to see if my girlfriend wanted to come along and is expecting me to call back in a minute to confirm."

"Yep, I'll go. I'm glad you called when you did. Now I need to buy new clothes," I told him, thinking about all of the different outfits I might need.

I heard Ranger sigh. "Celia's already calling back on the other line," he said and hung up.

I practically danced over to Lula and told her the news.

"Wow, I bet his parents are Wonder Woman and the Hulk," she said as we left the Coach store and headed towards Banana Republic. "You need to get some great outfits. You're gonna meet his family, and you need to make them think you're hot enough for him."

I came to a dead stop and looked at Lula. "Geez, Lula. I know I'm not a supermodel, but I think I'm alright."

"I didn't say you weren't, but this is Ranger we're talking about. He's the hottest man on the planet. Do you think his family calls him Ranger?"

I rolled my eyes as I started walking again. "No, I imagine they call him Carlos. And he seems to think I'm good enough for him, so that's all that matters." There was no point in letting onto Lula that I thought she had a point. I felt like a bridge troll compared to him, but he didn't complain. I had wondered what other people thought when they saw us together. I know I judged couples when someone was significantly more attractive than their partner.

I left the outlet mall four hours later laden with shopping bags. I hadn't been sure how formal the attire would be either at dinner or the party, so I bought two cocktail dresses, a casual dress with a floral print, a pair of black dress pants, a brown skirt, and three new shirts. I had shoes and purses to coordinate.

"Nice job, Steph," Lula said as she shoved our bags into the trunk of the Firebird. "You're gonna look smokin' hot when you meet his family. You'll have to tell me if he has any cute single brothers."

"I know he has one brother, but I'm not sure if he's single or hot," I replied, getting into the passenger seat. "Though I can't imagine he's ugly. He's a Manoso, after all."

"That's true. Where do they live?"

"Here in Newark," I told Lula. "Ranger took me to their neighborhood once when we were looking for Julie, but I don't know exactly where they live. I just know it's a Cuban neighborhood similar to the Burg."

"We could do a stake out," Lula suggested.

"No, let's get back home. I need to start thinking about what I'll wear. I only have four days to be sure about what I want to wear over the weekend," I said, feeling the beginnings of nervous butterflies in my stomach. I haven't had to do the 'meet-the-parents' deal in years, which had been when Dickie and I had started dating in college. Life was much different now.

Now my biggest worry was whether a car would explode, a building burn down or a lunatic would show up at dinner, making me look like an idiot in front of the entire family. I crossed myself and asked God to give me a break when I met Ranger's family, keeping cars and buildings in one piece and crazy people at bay for the weekend.


	10. We Are Family

A/N: Thank you to my amazing readers and reviewers. I'm so grateful for your input on the story.

It was four o'clock Friday afternoon, and I was wearing a plum-colored cocktail dress that fell to about two inches above my knees. It had one strap over my right shoulder and an empire waist with a silver band of fabric dividing the bust from the rest of the dress. I'd bought a pair of silver strappy heels and a silver clutch to match. I thought I looked pretty good, though I debated about whether to put my hair up or leave my hair down. I ultimately decided to wear it pinned up, with a few curls left loose for effect. I hoped that I wouldn't stand out like a sore thumb next to a delectable Ranger.

My make-up was more than natural, but less than tramp, and I wore simple cubic zirconium earrings. I was assessing my look in the full length mirror on my bedroom wall for the umpteenth time when Ranger walked in. He looked like he had been ripped from an Armani catalog with his black blazer, black shirt and black pants. Concern for messing up the look I'd just spent two hours on was the only thing that kept me from tearing his clothes off. I was slightly frustrated because once I looked at Ranger, and then checked out my own reflection again, I felt subpar.

"Can't you ever look just averagely attractive?" I asked him.

Ranger looked down at his clothes, and did a palms-up. "What?"

I waved a dismissive hand. "I've been trying to make the difference between us as minimal as possible. But it looks like I didn't make much of an impact."

Ranger stared at me for a moment. "I think you've been having part of this conversation in your head without me."

I gave up a sigh. "Haven't you ever seen couples where one of the partners is ridiculously good-looking, and the other is either just plain or plain ugly, and you think 'how did they end up together'?"

Ranger looked at me as if I'd just asked him to recite the Pledge of Allegiance backwards in Swahili.

"I guess, but I'm still not sure I'm in on this conversation," he replied slowly.

I rolled my eyes. "You're the ridiculously good-looking partner, and I'm the plain one that people look at and think 'Good God, how did she end up with him?'."

Ranger put his hands on his hips and stared at me for a full minute. "I've never known you to be insecure about your body."

I shrugged as I turned to check my hair again in the mirror. "I'm not usually. It may just be nerves about meeting your family. I don't want them to think you could do better, even though you could."

I had the feeling I sounded like a raving lunatic and wondered if Ranger wouldn't decide to go to Newark alone this weekend.

Ranger walked up behind me, put his arms around my waist and met my eyes in the mirror's reflection. "Steph, I think you're incredibly sexy, and I'm not alone in holding that opinion. Don't worry about what other people think, and try to focus on enjoying our weekend." He kissed me just below my ear and pulled back. "We need to leave in ten minutes. Is your bag packed?"

I nodded to my black duffle bag by the door. "Where will we be staying?"

Ranger picked up my bag. "I have an apartment in Newark. I know my parents would prefer us to stay at their house, but they're more conservative and would make us sleep in separate rooms."

I chuckled. "That would certainly be a tragedy."

"It would be, especially after having to see you in that dress all evening. I'm going to have to work hard to not let my mind wander too much this evening in front of my family, or I could really cause a scene."

I smacked him on the arm as I walked past him out of the room. "How many safe houses do you have? I know you have one in North Trenton, but didn't know you had one in Newark."

I walked down the stairs ahead of Ranger, careful not to trip and fall in my tall heels.

"It's not a safe house," Ranger said as we reached the bottom step. "I guess it's what you tend to call 'the Batcave'."

I came to a sudden stop at the base of the stairs, causing Ranger to bump into me, but he put an arm around my waist to keep me from falling over.

"What?" Ranger asked, walking around me towards the door. "Did you forget something?"

I had been frozen in shock since his pronouncement that we'd be staying at the Batcave. I had wondered about this illusive place for nearly five years, but had no idea where it was. I hadn't thought about it being in Newark before, but it made sense.

"I just can't believe I'm going to see the place you consider your home," I told him, grabbing my house keys of the sideboard.

"You're one of very few people in my life to get to know me well. And you'll get to know me better than anyone, if you keep me around."

I gave a fake, nonchalant shrug. "We'll see."

My leg bounced nervously as the Turbo sped north on Route 1. We were having dinner at Esmeralda, an upscale restaurant in downtown Newark that was owned and operated by his brother Emilio and Emilio's wife Lucy. I was glad I'd chosen a nice dress to wear, as I'd looked up Esmeralda on UrbanSpoon, and found that it was liked by ninety-seven percent of reviewers and came with a $$$$ tag, which indicated it was considered 'fine dining'.

"Do all of your sisters still live in Newark?" I asked, trying to take my mind off my nerves.

"Sofia and Celia do, but Silvia lives in Brooklyn and Aurelia is in Manhattan," he told me, his demeanor calm as a truck likely doing thirty miles over the speed limit honked and gave us the finger. I took a peak at Ranger's speedometer. It read that he was fifteen over the limit, which was typical for Jersey.

Now I knew all of his siblings' names, which was a start, but I was hoping to have a little more background before we got there.

"Who's the oldest? Where do you fall in the line?" I asked as I tried to repress my bouncing knee by crossing my legs. The result was a jiggling foot.

Ranger put his hand on my leg. "They're going to love you, Steph, don't worry about it. As for the birth order, Celia is the oldest, Emilio and Sofia are twins, Aurelia, Silvia and me."

"Wow, really? You're the youngest? I always pictured you as the oldest, given how strong and protective you are."

Ranger snorted. "I put up with shit from my older siblings and got my ass kicked by neighborhood kids. That's how I learned to fight and protect myself and others."

It was hard to imagine a little Ranger being teased and beaten up by other kids, particularly given how attractive and fit he was as an adult. I squeezed the hand that rested on my leg as we merged onto the Parkway headed towards Newark. Ranger responded by moving his hand up my thigh, making my dress ride up.

"Hey buddy, you're driving," I told him, giving his hand a light smack.

Ranger smiled. "Babe, I can drive a car and make you happy at the same time."

I moved his hand back down my leg. "Another time. I'd rather not be flustered going into dinner with your family. Speaking of your family, who else will be there tonight?"

"All of my siblings and their spouses, then my Grandma Rosa, who lives with my parents, and my Grandma Bella from Miami. I believe the kids are staying with babysitters tonight."

"You have a Grandma Bella?!"

"Yes, but she's nothing like Bella Morelli."

"Just the name gives me the chills," I told Ranger, fighting the urge to make the sign of the cross.

Fifteen minutes later, we pulled up outside of a ten-story building. As soon as we pulled up, a man in a black suit came out to the car. He opened my door, and I stepped out of the Turbo. The man handed Ranger a valet ticket, got in the Turbo and drove away. I imagined he'd take the longest way possible to the parking garage, just to enjoy his time in the expensive sports car. Ranger took my hand guided me to a set of double doors. He opened the door and I walked inside to a two-story lobby with black marble floors and cream-colored walls. There was an elevator to the right and a large marble staircase to the left that led to a walkway across the second floor. In front of us was a set of French doors with the name 'Esmeralda' etched in dark red across the glass above the door frame.

"We're in the upstairs banquet room," Ranger said, and guided me towards the staircase. We took the stairs up to the walkway and to another set of French doors. He opened the door and I walked through it with Ranger close behind me. A large round table was set up in the middle of the floor. It looked to be mahogany, but was covered in a dark red tablecloth and surrounded by chairs of the same style. Two older women were sitting at the table next to each other, speaking animatedly while they sipped red wine. A group of men stood around the bar in the corner, laughing and holding drinks. A red-headed woman wearing a loose-fitting black dress was giving instructions to two waiters, who were taking hasty notes on pads.

"Oh Carlos, you're here!"

I turned to see a woman in her early –sixties walking quickly our way. She looked to be about three or four inches shorter than me, with dark hair cut in a short bob. She wore a blue wrap dress that came to her knees and matching heels. When she smiled, it was the same mega-watt smile as Ranger's.

"Hola," Ranger said, kissing his mother on the cheek as she hugged him. When his mother released him, she turned to me.

"Mom, this Stephanie Plum. Steph, this is my mother, Lola Manoso."

I smiled at Mrs. Manoso, putting up my best Burg manners. "Hello Mrs. Manoso. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Mrs. Manoso pulled me into a surprising hug. I patted her awkwardly on the back, looking over at Ranger, who gave me a small grin.

"Please, call me Lola. Mrs. Manoso makes me feel old," Lola said, pulling back from me. She held me at arm's length and appraised me for a minute. "You are absolutely beautiful, Stephanie."

I was taken aback by Lola Manoso's lavish praise, but before I could respond, I was approached by more women. The first was Celia, who was my height and had blonde highlights in her brown hair. She also hugged me, told me I was beautiful and instructed Ranger not to let me go. By the time Ranger's sister Sofia did the same thing, I was beginning to think it was a Cuban custom.

Javier Manoso had greeted me warmly with a smile and handshake. He had the same intelligent eyes and dimples as Ranger. He was still a very handsome man in his sixties, so I imagined he looked a lot like Ranger when he was younger. It's no wonder they had six kids.

Aurelia was more restrained, merely shaking my hand and giving me a small 'hello'. Ranger's brother, Emilio, gave me a big hug, lifting me slightly off the ground. Once he put me down, the red-head I saw earlier smacked him on the back of the head.

"Honestly, Emilio. You'll have to forgive my husband, Stephanie, he has no impulse control. I'm Lucy, and I'm so thankful to see another non-Cuban," she told me, grinning behind her at her family-in-law.

"Ouch, that wounds us," Emilio said, putting a hand over his heart.

"John's not Cuban," Aurelia offered, at which Lucy rolled her eyes.

"John also spends any time he's around us glued to his cell phone. I've had better conversations with Grandma Rosa, and she doesn't speak English," Lucy muttered so only I could hear her.

Ranger came to my side at last, putting his hand on my back. "Feeling better about yourself?" he whispered in my ear.

I nodded and smiled. "They certainly know how to make a girl feel special."

"Where's Silvia?" Ranger asked, looking around the room. "I thought this was a mandatory event."

Celia cleared her throat, catching Ranger's eye with a significant look.

"I'm not sure," Lola said, checking her watch. "Maybe we need to call her."

"I'll check on her, Mom," Celia offered. "Why don't you go sit down?"

Lola, Aurelia, Lucy and Sofia went to the table, and Emilio had wandered off to talk to the men by the bar, leaving Ranger and me standing with Celia.

"What's going on?" Ranger asked Celia in a quiet voice.

Celia looked around to make sure none of the family was around.

"Silvia called me earlier to tell me she didn't know if she would make it. She and Michael had a huge fight last night and they were trying to work things out, though she didn't want to tell me why. I finally got it out of her that she's been having an affair and he found out about it. I don't want to tell Mom and Dad about it this weekend because I don't want to upset them, but I'm afraid they'll either try to go see her or call her if I don't come up with a good enough excuse," Celia finished.

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "I can't believe Silvia had an affair."

Celia's eyes widened. "I know! At least the 'good girl' has finally screwed up like the rest of us. But come on, help me make up an excuse. You're an excellent liar."

Ranger snorted. "It's a good skill to have. I think you need to confirm with Silvia that she definitely won't be coming tonight first. We don't want to make up an excuse and then have her show up. If she won't be here, then she needs to know the story as we're telling until the truth comes out, or gets swept under the rug. We could go with a migraine, say Michael is there to take care of her, and that she hopes to be over it by the party tomorrow."

Celia thought about it for a moment. "Sounds good. I'll go make the call now."

I stood with Ranger after Celia left. "Wow. I've been around ten minutes, and I'm already in on the family gossip. I feel honored."

"Yeah, you should, especially when it's about Silvia. She's our version of Valerie."

I nodded my understanding. "It's a nice feeling for a bit when the perfect one screws up."

Ranger guided me over to the table and pulled out a chair next to one of the older women. "Steph, this is my Grandma Bella. Abuela, this is my girlfriend, Stephanie."

Grandma Bella smiled sweetly at me. "Hello, Stephanie. It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," I replied, taking my seat. Ranger made an introduction in Spanish to the other older woman, his Grandma Rosa, who smiled and waved. I returned the smile and wave.

The dinner table conversation flowed naturally, with everyone carrying on more than one conversation at a time. Celia had come back to the room to announce that Silvia wouldn't be making it due to a migraine, and within minutes of this announcement, dinner began being served. I noticed Ranger was more relaxed around his family, smiling and talking more often than usual. I was peppered with questions about how Ranger and I met, why it took us nearly five years to end up together, and if we had plans to get married. Ranger had handled the last question, luckily, the way I had with my own family. I didn't figure his family ever referred to him as Ranger, so anytime I said his name, I called him Carlos, though I tended to stumble through it the first couple of times. I saw the corners of his mouth twitch each time.

By the end of the evening, I had learned more about Ranger's family from observing and participating in different conversations. I found out Lola worked as a nurse and Javier was a contractor who owned his own business. Celia taught third grade, and her husband Andres worked with Javier. They had two children. Sofia was a stay-at-home-mom to four kids while her husband Tony practiced family law. Aurelia worked as an accountant at a large bank in Manhattan while her husband John, a tall blonde man around fifty who indeed did not look up from his cell phone much, worked on Wall Street. Silvia, I was told, worked as an interior designer and likely had a migraine from exposure to fabric glue and her husband Michael was a doctor. Emilio and Lucy owned the restaurant, but hadn't managed to have any children after three miscarriages.

"You were also the one that helped get Julie back when she was kidnapped," Celia mentioned as a flan was being brought out for dessert.

I took a sip of water, having had one glass of wine already and not trusting myself to have another. "Well, I made myself an easy target to get kidnapped by the same person, but other than that, I'm not sure I was much help. I was more terrified during the situation than I think Julie was. Carlos was the one who tracked down the guy, got in his head and then got shot so that Julie and I could be saved."

Ranger put his hand on my leg and squeezed. "Stephanie doesn't realize the impact she made in Julie's rescue. She has this uncanny ability to get people to open up to her, which led us to finding out the guy's real name and ultimately tracking him down. I believe that if Steph hadn't been involved, I wouldn't have been able to find the guy in time before he lost interest and killed Julie."

My mouth fell open at this statement. I couldn't believe he was giving me so much credit for saving Julie. In reality, my kidnapping was inevitable because Scrog had wanted me. It wasn't like I'd pulled some Mission: Impossible-style break in to where Julie was being held.

I put my hand on top of Ranger's and squeezed, not quite sure how to respond. Celia, ever the leader, stood and faced her parents.

"Before we start dessert, I thought we should recognize Mom and Dad for the forty years they've been married, working hard to create a life for their children and staying in love the entire time. I can only hope that Andres and I have the same amount of time together, and experience even half as much happiness. I honestly can't imagine your lives when the six of us were growing up. We all managed to get into some sort of trouble at some point, except for Silvia, yet you loved us and you supported us in whatever way we needed you to in order to get through it. We all came out on the other side better for the experience, and now you have six children, five children-in-law and seven grandchildren who are here because of your love and sacrifice. We tried to figure out what we could give you to show you how much we appreciate you, and we realized nothing can come close to thanking you. We have, however, decided you deserve the honeymoon you never had, so you will be spending ten days in Hawaii at a luxurious resort where you will be taken care of in every way possible. We love you."

Everyone raised their glasses towards Lola and Javier, who looked stunned at the gift their children had just given them. Lola wiped tears from her eyes as she looked affectionately at her family. As I watched Lola and Javier, I wondered if that would be Ranger and me in the future. I could imagine him in his sixties when I looked at his father, though when I thought of myself in my sixties, I could only picture a taller and younger looking Grandma Mazur.

Once Celia sat down, Emilio stood up. "I have to say that Celia made a mistake in her speech. She said there are seven grandchildren, when there are actually nine, but the youngest two won't be making an appearance for another five months."

A collective gasp ran around the table as Lucy smiled brightly. "We have not only made it through a first trimester, but we've made it almost halfway through the second trimester with two babies, no complications and I've managed to keep it a secret until now. Now that's anniversary present," she quipped, making everyone laugh.

Lola jumped up and ran around the table to hug her daughter-in-law and put a hand on her abdomen, which was now obviously rounded when the dress was pressed against it. The grandmothers were crying and speaking excitedly in rapid Spanish. I looked over at Ranger.

"This is the first time I'm meeting your family, and I've managed to get in on a family secret and a major announcement. Have all of the girls you've brought home been privy to such special treatment?" I asked, lacing my fingers in his.

Ranger smiled and brought my hand up to his lips. "Babe, the only other woman I've ever brought to meet my family was Rachel, and that wasn't a normal situation."

I smiled at him. "You are full of surprises. I suspected you hadn't brought many women home, but to be the first girlfriend you've brought home makes me feel pretty important."

I hadn't realized that we'd gotten lost in our own conversation and each other, because I suddenly became aware that it was silent in the banquet room and everyone was staring at us.

"Did we miss something?" Ranger asked, apparently as confused as I was.

Lola had walked around the table from where Lucy was sitting and came over to Ranger, putting her hands on his shoulders.

"No, Carlos. We were just admiring you and Stephanie, and how obviously in love you are with each other. I've always wanted you to find the happiness your father and I have had, and I think you have," she told him, kissing him on the top of the head.

I tried not to blush, and Ranger patted his mother's hand on his shoulder. "Thanks, Mom."

Conversation resumed around the table as people began enjoying their flan. Lucy and Celia had disappeared at some point, and Andres and Tony had gone back to the bar to get fresh drinks. I excused myself from the table and went in search of the restroom, which Ranger told me was done the hall. I found the ladies' room and walked into the lounge area, where a large mirror with lights and chairs was set up for refreshing make-up and hair. There was another door, which led to the restroom. I could hear voices coming from the room and realized as I was retouching my lipstick that it was Lucy and Celia.

"I don't think I've ever seen Carlos look so happy," Celia was saying. "Earlier when he kissed her hand and smiled at her, I nearly started crying. It was about the sweetest thing I've ever seen out of my little brother."

"Oh I know. These pregnancy hormones are making me emotional, and I wanted to start crying as soon as they walked in and I saw how he was watching her. He is so in love with her," Lucy replied as I heard water start running in a sink. "I hope they get married. She's different from him, and it brings out the best in him. Not to mention, I think she'd be a great addition to the family."

Celia laughed. "You also like that she's another non-Cuban. Too bad she isn't a red-head, or I think you'd be holding Carlos at gun-point to marry her."

Both women laughed, and I gave it a minute before walking into the restroom, not wanting them to know I'd been listening.

"Hey, we were just talking about you," Celia said when she saw me. "We are amazed at how sweet my brother is with you. Is he always like this?"

I thought about how Ranger had been with me around his family, and found I was surprised that it had been no different than he normally was around me, with the exception of keeping the oozing sexuality under wraps. "Yeah, I guess he is. I'm so used to it, I don't think about how it appears to other people."

Celia looked surprised. "I thought you guys had only been together about a month?"

I nodded as I started washing my hands. "Yes, but he's been this way with me for a long time. We always seemed to be somewhere between friends and boyfriend/girlfriend, but we never got to the dating part until recently."

Lucy caught my eye in the mirror and grinned. "Really? So you'd had a taste of the goods before you started dating then?"

Celia covered her ears. "Hey, that's my baby brother. I don't want to know."

I shook my head. "And I don't want to talk about it either, so we're good."

Lucy sighed. "You two are no fun."

The three of us walked out of the restroom together and headed back to the banquet room. We ran into Aurelia and John leaving. John was talking in what sounded like Chinese, and Aurelia was texting on her phone behind him as they walked. Neither of them bid us goodbye, or even acknowledge our presence. Lucy, Celia and I stared after them for a minute.

"I wonder if they ever talk to each other," Lucy said. "I think in the entire time I've been married to Emilio, I've seen them say five words to each other. They never smile, hold hands or appear remotely affectionate. I don't get it."

"I bet it's because he isn't Latino. Latinos are full of love and passion. He's Polish, I think," Celia said, peeking over the railing at her brother-in-law.

"Are the Polish not good lovers?" I asked, having no experience with one myself.

"My one experience was far from spectacular, but that may not be indicative of the culture as a whole. I just known I've had much more fun with my Puerto Rican for the past fifteen years," Celia said with a wink.

We walked back into the banquet room and found the rest of the family preparing to leave. Ranger was giving his each of his grandmothers a hug and kiss on the cheek when I walked over to him.

"You must bring Stephanie down to Miami sometime, Carlos," Bella said. "I want to get to know her better. She's clearly very special."

Ranger put an arm around my waist. "She is, Abuela."

I said goodbye to Lola and Javier, promising to see them at the party the next day. I told Celia and Lucy we were leaving for the night.

"Are you guys staying with Mom and Dad?" Celia asked Ranger.

"No, we'll be at my apartment," he replied.

Lucy winked at me. "Have a good night."

Ranger looked from Lucy to me, but I shook my head. He wouldn't be interested in the knowledge that his sister-in-law wants to know what he's like in bed.

We all walked down the stairs together, giving over our car tickets to the valets that were standing around the lobby. Ranger held my hand and rubbed his thumb over my knuckles. He had a look in his eyes that told me we'd be barely in the door of his apartment before I was being peeled out of my dress. I noticed Celia watching us, so I leaned over to whisper in Ranger's ear.

"You need to get that look off your face. Your sister is watching, and I don't think she wants to know how badly you want to get me in bed."

Ranger moved his head so his mouth was next to my ear. "Babe, we're Cubans. We always want to get our women in bed. Besides, I was thinking about the drive up, when I said I could drive and make you happy at the same time, and how I'll have to give you a demonstration on the ride to my place."

I tried to keep the blush off my face at the thought as Ranger kissed me just below my ear.

"Who had the Turbo?" asked one of the valets.

Ranger pulled me towards the door, giving a wave to the rest of the family still waiting in the lobby. We got in the car, and Ranger pulled away from the curb. I was nearly squirming with the idea of getting diddled in the Turbo, which seemed more exciting than the time Ranger and I had sex in it.

At least my ass won't be on the horn, I thought as Ranger drove with his left hand and began running his right hand up the inside of my thigh.


	11. Magalehna

_A/N: Thank you for your reviews and support! The last chapter was a difficult one to write, considering Ranger's large family, but apparently it went better than I thought. And just as a note, the title of each chapter is a song that I was listening to as I wrote and inspired me, so if you want to get an idea of where my head may have been, you can listen to the song and get the idea. Sorry it took longer than planned to get this chapter out. RL gets in the way sometimes. _

Twenty minutes later, Ranger punched in the security code to the underground parking garage of his apartment building. I was still panting and shaking from a fantastic orgasm as I moved my panties back to their regular position and pulled the hem of my dress down. Ranger had a slightly smug smile on his face as he pulled into a parking spot, and looked down at his lap once he turned the car off.

"Yeah, I can't get out of the car like this. There are kids in this building," he said, trying to adjust himself so that there wasn't an obvious bulge in his pants. I considered offering to take care of it for him, but realized I'd never be able to comfortably lean over with the console and gear shift in the way.

After a minute, he was able to find a position that was a little less obvious, though if you looked closely enough it was clear what was going on.

"I'll walk in front of you," I told him. "That is, if you can walk."

Ranger smiled. "Babe, I've had to do more than just walk while in this condition before. I'll manage."

Once we'd gotten our duffle bags out of the Turbo's cargo area, we walked over to the elevator and got on. Ranger pushed the number twelve button and the elevator began moving, but stopped on the main floor lobby. I noticed Ranger move his duffle bag to hold in front of him as two kids about ten years old stepped onto the elevator. They proceeded to hit every button not lit on the panel so that we stopped on every single floor, making them snicker and trying my resolve to not beat my head against the wall of the elevator. They got off on the fifth floor, which meant Ranger and I had to stop on every floor after that until we mercifully arrived at twelve. We stepped off the elevator and Ranger guided me down the hall to the right. We stopped in front of 1210, and Ranger pulled out a key and unlocked the door.

I held my breath as I stepped inside. I couldn't believe I was in the Batcave, which was currently pitch black so that I couldn't see a thing. Ranger had walked slightly ahead of me and flipped on an overhead light.

I was standing in a small, narrow entryway with closets along the right hand wall. To my left was a small galley kitchen that had white appliances and butcher block countertop. It also had a bar that opened onto the living room. The living room was about the same size as the living room in my old apartment, with a black leather sofa facing a flat screen television mounted on the wall. There were also two black leather recliners, a dark cherry coffee table and two matching end tables. On the wall behind the sofa were mounted picture frames of various people. I wasn't close enough to see who they were, but could tell there were older pictures and more recent photos mixed in. There was a small hallway off to the right of the living room.

"This is the bedroom," Ranger told me, beckoning me to follow him to a room down the hall.

There was a queen-sized bed with a cream-colored duvet in the middle of the room, flanked by two walnut bedside tables. Along the opposite wall were a dresser and desk that matched the bedside tables with a black leather office chair at the desk.

I noticed a bookshelf along the furthest wall that contained books and a bunch of random objects that had no clear connection to one another. I walked over to it and begin looking through them, finding a handcuff that had been severed from its twin, a small seashell, a SEAL cap that I had seen Ranger wear in the past, a key chain with various car keys, an ink pen, a little container with what looked like spent rounds and a rosary.

"This is a bit random," I told Ranger, who had been watching me look through his shelves. "Are these things significant, or did you just not know where to put them?"

"Each thing represents something or someone significant in my life," Ranger told me. "The rosary was the only thing my grandfather brought with him when he and my grandmother fled Cuba with my dad. The pen is the one I used when I signed up to join the Army. The handcuff is from when I was captured in Columbia and tortured for three days before escaping. The SEAL hat is from a friend who got killed a couple of days after he gave it to me. Julie gave me the seashell on the day her adoption by Ron was final. The bullets came out of the vest I was wearing when I was shot by Scrog. And the keys belong to every single car of mine that you've managed to destroy."

I was surprised that Ranger had kept things with sentimental value. The only time he had ever shown much attachment to anything had been the one time he let me wear the SEAL hat, and had told me it reminded him to always stay alert.

"Your reminders of me are bullets and keys to blown up cars? How romantic."

Ranger grinned and put an arm around my waist. "Well, I thought a condom and one of your thongs might be a bit tacky."

I smacked him on the arm, and then turned around to hug him. "Thank you for bringing me here," I told him. "It's nice to finally see this place. It tells me a lot about you."

"Like I said, you have the chance to know me better than anyone else," Ranger told me, kissing me on the top of the head.

I leaned back to look at him. "I know I'm the only girlfriend you've brought to meet your family, but I doubt I'm the only woman to have seen this apartment."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Babe, do you really want to know that information?"

"Yes, I can handle it. After all, I dated Joe Morelli, who's nailed half the women in Jersey."

"Are you wanting to know how many women have been in this apartment, or how many women I've slept with?"

I thought about it for a moment. "Both," I said, hoping I could handle the information. It was one thing to know about Morelli's past, as I had been there or learned about it as it happened. Ranger's would be coming at me all at once.

"I only lived here full-time for a year and a half, and during that time I brought three women here. One was a woman I had a sexual relationship with for a few months, and the other two were one-night stands," Ranger informed me.

I nodded. That number wasn't bad, but the number I was more curious about was going to be much higher. Ranger was a sexy man whose moral code was fairly vague on rules when it came to getting into a woman's panties. I stared at him expectantly when he didn't continue.

Ranger sighed. "And I have had sex with twenty-six women."

"Oh, that's not too bad. I was thinking it would be much higher. Do you at least remember everyone's names?"

"For the most part. There were a couple of one-night stands whose last names I never knew, but I'd recognize them if I saw them again."

I felt a little better after he told me that. Morelli's number had been well over a hundred, he only remembered about seventy-five percent of their names, and on more than one occasion while he and I had been out on a date, a woman had approached him and alluded to the fact that they had slept together, but he didn't remember her.

"Since I had to give it up, are you going to tell me your number?" Ranger asked.

"You mean you don't know that from your background checks on me?" I asked.

Ranger smiled. "We don't go that in-depth unnecessarily."

I rolled my eyes, and began counting off on my fingers. "There was Morelli and Carl Costanza in high school, Kyle Lewis and Greg Jones in college, Dickie Orr in college and marriage, Phillip Davenport after my divorce, and you, so that makes seven."

"You slept with Costanza?"

"Yeah, it was in high school, after Morelli. We got drunk the night of our senior prom and went at it in the back of his car. He ripped my dress, had a small dick and finished before I was even close."

Ranger shook his head. "I'll never be able to look at Costanza the same way again. And here I thought the Trenton PD was cleared out of all of the men who had seen you naked."

"There are a lot more women who've seen you naked than men who have seen me naked. Anyone I know?" I asked. There had always been lots of rumors about Ranger and Jeanne Ellen Burrows, but I'd never asked him before.

"Ancient history, babe," Ranger said as he began unzipping my dress. "You're not the first woman in this apartment, but you will be the first woman in this bed."

He certainly knows how to change a topic.

I woke up the next morning snuggled against Ranger in his bed. The sheets weren't the orgasmic thread count of the ones he had in his apartment at Rangeman, but they were comfortable and we had thoroughly christened his bed during the night. I slid out of his grip, picked up my duffle bag from the bedroom floor and made my way to the bathroom. I showered and got ready for the day, putting on a floral summer dress with a halter top. I pulled my hair back in a pony-tail and put in some silver hoop earrings. I wandered out to the kitchen, but found it mostly empty. It wouldn't make sense to keep much food when Ranger wasn't here often, though he thankfully kept coffee supplies on hand. I had the coffee brewing when Ranger walked out of the bedroom. He was wearing a pair of sweat pants and was shirtless as he grabbed a coffee cup for himself.

"There's nothing to eat," I told Ranger as my stomach growled loudly. "I worked up an appetite last night, and now I'm starving."

Ranger grinned. "There's diner nearby that I like to go to for breakfast. Let me get showered and dressed, and we'll eat there before heading to Sofia's house."

Ranger took his coffee into the bathroom with him and I took mine into the living room. I stood in front of the couch and looked at the picture frames on the wall behind it. There were photos of Ranger as a little boy with his grandparents, his grandmothers looking very much the same as they did last night, only with less gray hair and fewer wrinkles.

A photo containing all four grandparents, both parents and all six kids had been taken in front of a large tree, and Ranger looked to be about five or six years old at the time. A photo directly below it showed the family twenty-five years later, with the grandfathers notably missing, and five great-grandchildren fighting to sit still. Sofia was very pregnant in the photo, and Ranger's hair was cut in the same short style he'd kept for the past couple of years, indicating the photo was fairly recent.

I moved along the wall, finding a recent school photo of Julie. She looked much the same as when I had seen her, though slightly more mature. I recognized a photo of Ranger with the men from his Special Forces unit as the one he had showed me when Orin was on the loose and hunting us down. There was another photo of Ranger standing at attention in his Army uniform. He looked incredibly young, with his hair buzzed short, and a serious expression on his face. There were no pictures of old girlfriends or his ex-wife, thankfully, but there were also no pictures of his new girlfriend.

Ranger came back out to the living room a little while later, dress in black pants and a black dress shirt. He was sans jacket, which made me wonder where he was keeping his gun.

"I was enjoying your pictures," I told him. "You were adorable as a little boy."

"I looked like a boyish version of Julie."

I looked over at Julie's picture and then back at Ranger's picture of his younger days. He was kind of right.

"Well, Julie's beautiful."

"Yes, she is. But boys aren't supposed to be beautiful."

We went to breakfast at a nearby diner where Ranger ordered an egg-white omelet and fruit while I had chocolate chip pancakes and bacon. I'd received a 'how the hell did you end up with him' look from the waitress when I placed my order, and a 'you're going to get fat eating like that' look from Ranger.

"The metabolism lasts until forty, so I still have a few years left to enjoy it. Then I'll start eating healthier," I told him.

"It takes a while to get into those habits, babe."

"Are you going to leave me if I get fat?"

Ranger didn't say anything for a minute, but took a sip of his coffee as he looked at me. I made a look of indignation at the implied response.

"No, babe, I won't leave you if you get fat. I will, however, try to get you to exercise and eat healthier so that you'll live longer and give us more years together," he finally responded.

Damn, that was actually kind of sweet, and it had made me feel guilty about my order. I flagged down our waitress and replaced my bacon with fruit. Small changes turn into big ones, right?

We made it to Sofia's house an hour later, where Celia was passing out orders to her siblings and in-laws as to their responsibilities during the party. I offered to help, but Celia waved it away, telling me I was still new, so I was off the hook this time around. Ranger was given the task of keeping the peace between some feuding cousins, and ensuring that the bartender cut people off before they had too much to drink to be able to drive home safely. The weather was beautiful, so the party would be spilling out into the backyard where tables and chairs were set up around a dance floor. A salsa band was milling around, setting up their instruments and testing the acoustics of the backyard.

"Hey Stephanie," Lucy said as she headed towards the kitchen to start her job of setting out the food. "Just a few words of advice on attending a Manoso/Carranza family event: Don't turn our back on Uncle Humberto, he'll grab your ass; don't ask cousin Maria Angela about her eyebrows, and never, ever mention Castro, the Bay of Pigs, or Guantanamo Bay."

I stared at Lucy for minute, processing everything she'd told me. I had a feeling the only thing I actually had to worry about was Uncle Humberto's wandering hands, but I was grateful for the warnings nonetheless.

Lola, Javier and their mothers arrived at eleven-thirty and the party was due to start at noon. I was helping Sofia put the finishing touches on the tables' centerpieces when people started to arrive. I had always thought my family was enormous, given we were Italian and Catholic, but Cuban and Catholic put my family to shame. Ranger was hugged by numerous aunts, uncles, and cousins, all of whom asked him if he was seeing anyone. As soon as he would indicate me, I was hugged and kissed and welcomed to the family as though Ranger and I were married. When an older man wearing tan trousers and a blue striped shirt grabbed my butt while hugging me, I knew I'd found Uncle Humberto.

A woman with a massive unibrow came in after Ranger had removed Uncle Humberto's hand from my ass and gave him a beer.

"Hola Maria Angela," Ranger said as the woman kissed him on both cheeks. "This is my girlfriend, Stephanie."

Maria Angela's unibrow shot up. "Oh, Carlos. How wonderful! Welcome to the family, Stephanie," Maria Angela said, hugging me and kissing me on both cheeks.

"Geez," I told Ranger after Maria Angela left us to join the crowd. "Your entire family acts like we just announced our engagement or something."

Ranger wrapped an arm around my waist, resting his hand on my hip. "Babe, they know that if I'm bringing someone home to meet the family, it's permanent."

I turned to look at him, a look of incredulity surely written all over my face. "That's incredibly presumptuous of you, Mr. Manoso."

Ranger watched me for a minute with an expression of amused affection. "Do you _really_ think so?"

I knew it wasn't presumptuous. It was a fact I had known since I decided to pursue a relationship with Ranger. I squeezed his hand as yet another Manoso family member greeted us, thus bringing the conversation to a close.

I was shuttled around the party, meeting various people and helping out wherever I was needed. After an hour of mingling, Celia stood on the dance floor and used a microphone from the band's loud speaker to thank everyone for coming to the party to honor her parents' anniversary. She then informed Lola and Javier that they would be dancing to the song they danced to at their wedding, which was something in Spanish that I didn't quite catch. I was standing along the edge of the party, sipping a glass of wine and watching the Manosos dance when I felt someone come up behind me.

I instinctively leaned back, thinking it was Ranger when a hand pinched my butt. I squeaked and turned around to find Uncle Humberto grinning at me. I caught sight of Lucy in my peripheral vision doubled over laughing.

"I thought you were Carlos," I told him, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. Humberto winked at me and walked away.

I looked around for Ranger and could see him through the windows in the kitchen, standing between two men. I walked inside and could hear raised voices. These must be the feuding cousins.

They were arguing in Spanish with Ranger standing in the middle, speaking in a his typical calm tone.

"Hey, guys," I announced after a moment. "What's the problem?"

All three men turned to face me. "Who the hell are you?" the tallest of the men asked. He had a mean look about him that made me feel uncomfortable, like the kind of person you'd see on the news for murdering his wife.

"That's my girlfriend, Stephanie," Ranger said coolly.

The taller man sneered at me for a moment. "A white girl, of course. You always did have bad taste, Carlos."

My jaw dropped open at the remark. Ranger's family had been nothing but kind to me, and no one had said anything about me being white, except for Lucy, who had been thrilled.

Ranger stared at the man for a moment. "I don't care what you think of my taste, Juan. Just avoid Ernesto during the party today. Celia will kill you both if you ruin the party she's worked so hard to set up."

The man I presumed was Ernesto snorted. "I'm more concerned about him avoiding my wife. I'd love nothing more than to meet him behind the garage, so I can bury him in Sofia's rose bushes."

Ernesto turned his attention to me. "Hey, Stephanie, consider yourself lucky that Juan doesn't like white girls. Otherwise, he'd probably try to get in your pants the way he did my wife's."

Juan started to charge at Ernesto, but Ranger grabbed him by the shirt and shoved him against the wall.

"Don't even think about it. It's the truth, and you know it. Get outside, now." Ranger told him, releasing him. Juan stalked away, bumping into me as he walked out into the backyard.

Ernesto loitered around for a minute, looking out the window. "I can't believe Celia invited us both. What was she thinking?"

"She was probably thinking you two could act like adults for the sake of your aunt and uncle," Ranger told him. "But she assigned me the task of making sure you two didn't get in a fight, just in case. Can you go out there and behave, or do I have to shoot both of you?"

Ernesto was a little shorter and stockier than Ranger, but he wasn't bad looking. He looked outside again for a minute, shoved his hands in his jean pockets and walked out the back door. Ranger walked over to me, and pulled me into a hug.

"I'm going to be more of a bouncer than the son of the honorees today," he told me. "Try to have fun without me, but a word of caution: avoid Juan. He may try to antagonize you into saying something, hoping you'll make yourself look bad in front of the family. He's a hothead, and the reason he's not married is because he beat the shit out of his wife one too many times, and she left him. I'd rather not have to kill him, though the entire family would help me hide the body and no one would breathe a word. No one likes him, not even his own parents."

I kissed Ranger on the cheek. "Understood, but I'll stick with you as much as I can. I may kill Uncle Humberto if he grabs my ass again."

Ranger chuckled. "Yes, he's the family pervert. I'd threaten him, but he'd just tell me that it would be a hell of a way to go out and do it anyway. I'm trying not to maim or kill anyone today, but people like Juan make it difficult."

We walked back out into the yard and watched as Ranger's parents finished their dance. The crowd clapped and then the band began a lively salsa number. Several couples made their way to the dance floor and began dancing. I was amazed at how good they all were, even the older couples.

"Wow, everyone's so good," I told Ranger.

"We're Cubans, babe. We're great on the dance floor, in the kitchen and in the bedroom."

I grinned. "I'm well aware of that last part, though I've never seen you make anything more complicated than a sandwich, and I've never seen you dance."

"All in time, babe."

The sound of raised voices met our ears. Ranger sighed and walked away, headed over to a table where Juan was sitting across from Ernesto. Geez, you'd think they'd learn.

Sofia and Lucy caught my attention, waving me over to where they were standing with a pretty woman wearing a black dress. I made my way across the yard, skirting around Uncle Humberto's table.

"Stephanie, this is our sister Silvia," Sofia said, indicating the woman in black.

"Hello. It's nice to meet you," I told her as she shook my hand.

She nodded. "Likewise. I'm sorry I couldn't make it to dinner last night. I had a migraine."

Our eyes met for a moment, and I nodded. She likely knew that I was aware of the true story, but wasn't going to say anything. Lucy and Sofia chatted animatedly while Silvia and I stood silently, all of us watching the dance floor. Several young men came up and talked to Silvia, who was polite, but cool. I noticed a man watching her from a nearby table, and I suspected he was her husband. Silvia seemed to ooze sexuality like Ranger, so it really wasn't a surprise that nearly every male that wasn't family were practically clambering around her.

I went back in the house, not sure of what to do or who to talk to. I was ready for this party to be over, but suspected it wasn't even close to being over. We'd only been there three hours, and no one looked tired or bored. I walked in the kitchen, where both of Ranger's grandmothers were sitting and talking with a couple of older Cuban women. I waved as I walked past, headed towards the restroom. I took care of business, touched up my lip gloss and walked back towards the kitchen, where the voices of younger women speaking in English met my ears.

"I can't believe they are actually together. I mean, did you look at her? She's a white girl, first of all, and she's not very pretty. What the hell is Carlos thinking? She's only after his money, and the chance to make herself look good on the arm of a hot guy. I've seen her in the papers before. She's a disaster; they call her 'The Bombshell Bounty Hunter'. I imagine she must give really good head or something—"

"Angela! I can't believe you just said that!" I peeked around the corner of the wall to see who had yelled. It was Ranger's Grandma Bella. She was standing up, a fierce expression on her lined face.

"Sorry tia, but you can't believe she isn't interested in his money. You haven't seen the newspaper articles about her. She blows up cars, and burns down funeral homes. I have a friend whose brother-in-law works at the Trenton Police Department. She's a big joke, and apparently she used to be involved with an Italian cop, but everyone thought she was sleeping with Carlos at the same time. You can't know that she's not seeing someone else, and just keeping Carlos around for his money. We need to look out for him. You know he's never been the same since he came back from the Army, and I can't help but wonder if his judgment wasn't messed up while he was gone."

I heard footsteps across the kitchen, and a second later the sound of someone being smacked rang out. No one spoke for a minute, and it didn't sound like anyone was moving. I stood on the other side of the wall, trying not to breathe too hard while dealing the sensation of being kicked in the gut. Was this what people really thought about me? I'd never considered that people might see me as a gold-digger. I knew Ranger was wealthy, but I didn't often stop to consider what it meant. He lived well, but only because Ella made him do so. We never talked about money, except when I needed to earn it and he would give me some work at Rangeman. His expensive cars were collateral for security he provided to some business. I didn't want to hear anything else Angela had to say, so I quietly slipped down the hall to the restroom and loudly shut the door. I walked down the hall like I had just left the bathroom and tried to keep my face neutral. As I walked into the kitchen, everyone turned to look at me. Angela was holding her cheek, and another woman stood beside her looking equally shocked. Grandma Bella gave me a determined look, and I gave a small nod as I walked through and back out to the yard.

The band was playing a slow song as I walked through the tables to the food area. I started stuffing my face with some sort of chocolate pastry and picked up a flute of champagne to wash it down. I needed to distract myself from what I just heard before I saw Ranger again. He'd know something was wrong if he saw me at the moment, and I didn't want to explain what I'd just heard. He'd be disappointed in his family, or worse, he'd think they were right. I had felt so happy at dinner the night before, glad that his immediate family seemed to like me, and had assumed it would carry through to the extended family when they had greeted me so warmly. Angela's pronouncement made me question the entire family's feelings. I now suspected everyone thought of me as some pathetic tramp who was seducing a sexy, emotionally-damaged man for his money.

I really wanted to leave the party, but didn't think I would have the opportunity to do so without Ranger insisting on coming with me, plus I didn't want to distract from his parents' day. I also didn't want to stand around all afternoon trying to keep the feeling of rejection off my face.

I was still contemplating what my next move would be when I felt arms slip around my waist. Thinking it was Uncle Humberto, I threw an elbow back into his stomach.

"Oh, babe!" Ranger said, which made me spin around.

"Sorry, I thought you were Humberto."

He rubbed his rib cage for a moment, grimacing slightly. "Good aim. Those were the ribs that got broken when Scrog shot me. They've stayed a little tender since."

Great, now I was a gold-digging hussy who elbowed her boyfriend in an old injury he got while saving her life. Where was a sniper when you needed one?

"Sorry," I moaned again, picking up another flute of champagne and chugging it down.

"Babe, what's wrong?" Damn Ranger and his perceptiveness.

"Nothing," I lied, attempting a smile. "How's the babysitting going?"

"Juan left a few minutes ago, so the job's over. Are you sure you're ok?"

"Yeah, just a bit of a headache. Do you think Sofia would mind if I went to lie down for a bit?"

Ranger watched me for a minute, and I knew he was seeing if I would break and tell him the truth. "No, she wouldn't mind. Do you need something for the headache?"

"I've got something in my bag," I said. "I'll take it and lay down for a bit. I'm sure I'll feel better after a while." I kissed him on the cheek and went back inside.

The kitchen was mercifully empty, so I went upstairs and found the master bedroom, which had a dark red accent wall that served as a back drop for the king-sized bed. I closed the door, kicked off my shoes and laid down on the bed. It was incredibly comfortable, and within minutes, my faux-nap turned into a real one.


	12. You're Making Me High

_A/N: Every family has one or two idiots, Ranger's included. At least they are more distantly related. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and it will definitely be earning the M rating later on. Thanks for reading!_

I opened my eyes at the sound of someone saying my name. I blinked a couple of times and realized that Ranger was sitting on the edge of the bed.

"How long have I been asleep?" I asked, sitting up and stretching.

"About two hours. They are getting ready to serve dinner. How's your head?"

"Wh—oh, it's better," I said, forgetting momentarily about the excuse I'd used earlier. It also brought back the reminder of why I'd come upstairs.

Ranger nodded slowly. "Are you going to tell me the real reason you came up here?"

"My headache," I replied, climbing off the bed and straightening out the wrinkles in my dress. "It's better now."

"So it wasn't about what Angela said?"

"What did Angela say?" I asked innocently.

"You're an awful liar, babe." Ranger said, standing up and walking around the bed towards me. "My grandma told me that she thought you overheard a comment Angela made, and that it may be why you wanted to lie down. Do you want to talk to talk about it?"

I stood with my hands on my hips, looking around the room at everything but Ranger. I really didn't want to have this conversation with Ranger, but I was afraid that he wouldn't let it go. I hated feeling like a silly, emotional woman upset by another woman's comments. I'm Jersey Italian: I don't care what people say about me, but that standard seemed to go out the window when it came to my relationship with Ranger.

"Does the rest of your family feel the same way?"

"What way?"

"About what Angela said?"

"I don't know what Angela said, Grandma didn't give me the details, just that she thought you overheard it and might be upset."

So Ranger didn't know what was said, but now that he knew there was something, and that I was questioning the entire family's opinion of me, I knew he wouldn't let it go.

"Angela has read about me in the papers, and has a friend in the Trenton PD who knew about my relationship with Morelli and the rumors about my relationship with you in the past. She thinks your judgment has been screwed up since you left the Army and that you don't see me for the gold-digger that I am because I must give pretty good head." I spoke more rapidly towards the end of my epithet, holding my breath afterwards as though I were waiting for a bomb to go off.

Ranger was silent for a full minute-and-a-half, holding my gaze while keeping his neutral expression in place. Just when I was about to say something, he pulled me into his arms.

"I'm sorry," he said, kissing the top of my head. "I'll talk to Angela. Let's go eat."

I was surprised by the simplicity of his statement, and the sudden change of topic. He'd spent time just staring at me in the way he did when he was really pissed off about something, but then hurried me off to eat. Ranger moved in mysterious ways, and I knew I'd never completely understand them all. Hell, I didn't think I really knew any of them.

We walked downstairs and out to the backyard. The crowd looked like it had thinned out some, but there were still at least seventy people sitting at the tables around the yard. Dishes were placed in the middle of the tables, and everyone was eating family style. Ranger guided us towards a table where Silvia, Michael, Celia and Andres were already seated and serving themselves.

"Feeling better?" Celia asked me as I sat down.

I nodded and reached out for the bread basket. I looked around surreptitiously while I nibbled on a roll, spotting Angela at the next table. She gave me a shitty look before becoming engrossed in her plate. As I was dishing some sort of chicken on to my plate, I realized that what had bothered me about Angela was the reminder of Joyce Barnhardt. It wasn't the physical appearance, but the attitude. She thought me beneath her, and I imagined she was the type of woman to walk over whomever necessary to get what she wanted. I knew I didn't need to worry about her trying to steal Ranger the way Joyce stole Dickie. It wasn't just because they were family, but because I knew Ranger would never cheat with anyone. Angela could still be a thorn in my side, and cause waves with the family with her gold-digger remarks and discussion of my past with Morelli. I really wanted to do was go over to her table, drag her behind the garage by her hair and kick her in the head. If I actually tried to do that, it would simply result in a bitchy cat fight in the grass and we'd likely knock a table of food on top of us. What I was going to do was let Ranger talk to her the way he said he would.

But I'd try to eavesdrop if I could.

Dinner at our table felt strained, as Silvia and Michael weren't speaking directly to one another, and we all knew the reason why. Ranger, who had been more relaxed and talkative around his family the night before, was his normal silent self as we ate. Celia kept the conversations going, prompting us to respond as she deemed appropriate. I really liked Celia, and was convinced that if they wanted to, she and Ranger could rule the world. Andres was a good-natured man who clearly adored Celia, and seemed to enjoy her strong will. He had a laugh that carried around the yard, especially when he informed me that Celia would be turning forty in January, but that he wouldn't be forty until May, and she had glared at him in a way that made me surprised he didn't run for his life.

After dinner, Lola came over to me and asked if she could speak to me privately. I instantly felt nauseous, wondering if Angela's remarks had made their way back to Lola, and if she was going to grill me on whether I was money-hungry tramp who was preying on her baby boy or a two-timing floozy.

"Thank you for coming up this weekend with Carlos," she said. "I have to tell you that I haven't seen Carlos this happy in a long time —if ever, really. He's always kept his emotions pretty close to his chest, but I can see the difference in him. He's relaxed, he smiles more and when he looks at you, it leaves no doubt that he would walk through fire for you. I certainly hope this relationship lasts a lifetime, because you both deserve it."

My heart fluttered a little when Lola talked about how she could tell Ranger was happy with me. He kept himself so closed off that it was hard to tell what he was often thinking. I knew that he wouldn't be with me if he wasn't happy, but it was nice to know that it was noticed by others.

I hugged Lola and looked around for Ranger, who was no longer sitting at our table. A glance at the table next to it also told me that Angela was missing, and I couldn't help but wonder if they were in the same place. I headed back towards the house and through the kitchen, which was empty. I walked down the hall towards the bathroom, but stopped when I heard voices from the den a few doors down.

"—don't know anything about her," Ranger was saying in his calm, but 'I'm-really-pissed-off' tone of voice. "What do you think you're going to accomplish by trying to trash her?"

"You can't honestly believe she's not after you for your money, Carlos," Angela replied. I peeked around the corner and saw that Ranger and Angela were standing in front of the fire place on the far side of the room.

"Angela, she's known me since before I had the business, and I'm the one who pursued her, not the other way around. I don't have to justify my choice of partner to anyone, especially to someone who isn't even an actual member of this family, and I'm not going to let you try to sully the family's opinion of her with your nonsense. What do you get out of this anyway?"

I saw Angela take a step closer to Ranger and put a hand on his arm. "That's just it. I'm not actually family, and I've been hoping you'd notice me for years—," She stopped talking when Ranger removed her hand from his arm

"Angela, you may not be a legal or blood relative, but your mother is married to my uncle, and that's close enough to family to make things horribly awkward. There's also the fact that I don't like you in any way, let alone a romantic way, so you can get that insane notion out of your head."

Angela looked dejected as she started towards the door, giving me just enough time to slip in the bathroom and shut the door quietly before she walked past. I locked the door and turned on the light so that I could wash my hands. I thought about Angela wanting to be with Ranger and wrinkled my nose in disgust. He was right; even though she wasn't any actual relation, the fact that their relations were married was enough to make her pursuit of him seem gross. Uncle Humberto was beginning to seem normal compared to Angela. I thought the amount of oddballs seemed disproportionately high for Ranger's family, but considering how big the family was, it was likely a normal amount. After all, I had Grandma Mazur, Mary Alice and Albert Kloughn in my immediate family, which was much smaller than Ranger's.

When I walked out of the bathroom, Ranger was leaning against the opposite wall with his arms crossed across his chest.

"I was coming to look for you," I told him.

"I was having a heart-to-heart with Angela," Ranger told me, grabbing my hand and pulling me into him.

"Did that go well?"

"She's nuts, but I think she got the message," Ranger told me, bending down to kiss me. The kiss was intimate and sensual, and Ranger wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me very close to his body.

"Someone may walk in and see us," I told him, my lips brushing up against his as I spoke.

"Let them."

Ranger spun me around and pinned me up against the wall, deepening the kiss. We'd been that way for a minute or so when a wolf-whistle rang out. We broke apart to find Emilio and Lucy standing at the end of the hall.

"At least have the decency to get a room, Carlos," Emilio said, a big smile on his face. "Remember when we accidentally walked in on Silvia and Michael at Mom and Dad's right after they got engaged?"

Ranger shook his head. "I'm trained to compartmentalize situations, but I still can't manage to get that sight out of my head without feeling nauseous."

Lucy gave me a wink and fanned herself. "That was hot," she whispered as she walked past me. "I can't imagine what happens when you two are actually naked. It's a wonder you don't spontaneously combust or something."

I snorted. "I often wonder the same thing."

Ranger and I ended up leaving the party about thirty minutes later, having said our good-byes to the immediate family. We were driving back to Trenton when Tank called to say an account had experienced a break-in while the family was at a wedding , and that a substantial amount of jewelry was stolen. Ranger had dropped me off at my house and gone on to the account's home to inspect the situation.

I told Rex hello and gave him some food and fresh water. I checked my mail and started unpacking my clothes as I assessed the visit to Newark as a whole. Overall, it had been a good visit, even though Angela and Juan made efforts to make it uncomfortable. I wouldn't be likely to see either of them much in the future, so I felt that my experience with Ranger's immediate family was all that mattered in the end.

I called my mom to let her know that I was home, and that we had a good visit with Ranger's family. She pressed me for details about his family. and we ended up talking on the phone for over half an hour, which was long for us. I changed into my pajamas, found reruns of _Will & Grace_ on television and settled in for the night. Ranger hadn't said if he was coming back to my place, or going back to Rangeman, but I figured he would go home, since we'd just spent the weekend together.

In the episode I was watching, Grace had given Will a gift certificate to a psychic for this birthday, which got me to thinking about Ranger's birthday It was less than a month away, and I had no idea what I should give him. What do you get the man who has, or can have, everything, but wants nothing? I'd never gotten him anything for his past birthdays, but then we also hadn't been a couple during them.

I kept debating the issue over the next three weeks while I subtly tried to get information out of Ranger about something he would like. I knew he had plenty of watches and clothes, he didn't need cologne because he used the Bulgari shower gel that lingered on his body all day, and he wouldn't want any knick-knacks, movies or books. I finally decided on doing something sexy for him, not that our sex life needed spicing up, but something different.

Ranger was always so attentive to my needs in bed that I really never had an opportunity to repay him. My mind went back to Angela's accusation that I gave good head, and was stunned to realize that was one thing I had never done with Ranger. Most men— every man I'd ever been with at any rate— seemed to expect that in the lead up to sex, but Ranger and I had moved from some kissing and mild groping into full-on, hot-as-hell sex. This led me to further think about the time when I had an FTA that worked in a sex toy store, and I had brought home oils and a dildo while Ranger had been staying with me. He had like the oil, so I decided to work it into my plan. I made a mental note to stop for some oil and sexy lingerie, in black of course, to give Ranger a night of repaying him for the hottest sex I've ever known. I knew it wouldn't even come close to how satisfying Ranger was, but I wanted to give it an effort nonetheless.

Ranger's birthday fell on a Sunday, so I decided to give him his present on Saturday night. I informed him of when I intended to celebrate his birthday, and told him that he needed to be off-line from work that night.

"All night?" he had asked, and when I said yes, he gave me a wide smile.

"I don't typically celebrate my birthday, but I'm looking forward to it this year."

I knew Ranger could find anything he wanted in my house, considering he knew the security code and had keys, so I waited until eight hours or so before he would be at my house to go to the Pleasure Treasures store. I found the cherry oil and some lingerie that was a tiny black thong and a sexy mesh and lace camisole that went down to my hips with a slit up the middle that stopped just above my navel. I bought a CD of mood music and candles, and bundled it all up for the trip back to the house, eager for my plan to begin. Ranger was due home at seven, and I intended to be waiting for him.

It was two minutes to seven, and I was pacing the kitchen floor in my sexy lingerie and black do-me heels. I had closed all of the curtains in the house, locked the front door and kept peeking out the kitchen curtains to see if Ranger had pulled into the drive. At seven on the dot, Ranger's Turbo pulled in behind my garage. I checked my hair in the reflection from the microwave, adjusted my lingerie and waited until I heard Ranger's feet on the back step before I opened the door. I rested one hand on the door knob and the other on my hip, hoping my pose was sexy. Ranger looked surprised for a minute when the door opened, then his eyebrows shot up and his lips parted a little. He ran his eyes down the length of my body and back up again before a wide smile came across his face.

"Babe," he said and his voice slightly breathless and full of lust.

I looked him up and down, noticing that the crotch of his cargo pants was starting to look tight.

"Turn off your cell phone," I demanded. Ranger pulled it out of his pocket and hit the power button without taking his eyes off me.

I took his hand and pulled him inside, shutting and locking the door behind us. I proceeded to lead him through the kitchen and living room and upstairs. My heart was racing with the excitement of what was about to come, and I had butterflies in my stomach with the anticipation of Ranger enjoying what I had planned for him.

Once we were inside the bedroom, the only light was from the candles I had burning around the room. I hit the play button on my computer and the CD I bought at Pleasure Treasures sounded out with a song by Toni Braxton. I turned around and faced Ranger, working to remove the utility belt from around his waist. I put it on the bedside table before reaching up to kiss him. He put a hand on the small of my back and one in my hair as he returned the kiss, deepening it by pulling me closer to him.

I broke the kiss after a minute, pulling his shirt over his head and guiding him towards the bed. Ranger kicked off his boots as he sat down. I straddled his lap and resumed our kiss, pressing my breasts against his chest, the thin fabric between us making me gasp slightly as it tickled my nipples. Ranger started running his hands up my body, massaging my ass and then my breasts as he grounded himself against me. Again I pulled back and motioned for him to lie down on the bed with his head at the top of the bed. Once he was in position, I started unbuttoning and unzipping his pants, pulling them down his hips, exposing his black boxer briefs. I pulled off his pants and socks and threw them on the floor. I glanced over at the bedside table where I had the Lick It and Love It oil, and my eyes were drawn to the handcuffs on Ranger's utility belt. I'd used cuffs in the bedroom with Morelli before, though I'd been the one cuffed. I smiled slightly and crawled up to Ranger, kissing him.

"How much do you trust me?" I asked him, my lips brushing against his as I spoke.

"With my life, babe," he said.

I smiled and bit my bottom lip as I reached over and took the cuffs off the belt. I pulled them taut with my thumbs and raised an eyebrow, seeking his approval. After all, he'd just told me he trusted me with his life.

"Me?" He asked, eyeing the cuffs. I nodded, not saying a word.

The sigh that escaped Ranger was all the approval I needed.

I cuffed his left wrist and pulled it above his head, lacing the cuffs around one of the metal posts on my headboard. I grabbed his other wrist and put it in the other cuff, leaving Ranger helpless with his arms above his head.

He smiled and shook his head, as though he couldn't quite believe what was happening. I reached over for the oil and poured some into my hand. I rubbed my hands together before running them over his chest, circling his nipples. After a few seconds, Ranger sucked in a breath as the oil started to heat up. I poured more oil into my hands and massaged a line down his chest and stomach to the top of his boxers. I started licking and kissing a path down Ranger's neck to his chest, teasing each of his nipples with my tongue, liking the way the cherry mingled with the taste of Ranger's skin. I proceeded down his hard stomach, blowing briefly into his navel, which made him squirm and take several deep breaths.

I finally pulled off his underwear, releasing a very desperate erection. I poured a little more oil into my right hand, and ran it up the length of his penis. Ranger actually groaned, something uncommon for him. Ranger would moan slightly during sex, usually during orgasm, but it was restrained, just like the rest of his emotions. I could tell he was losing some of his famous self-control at my actions, and when I took him in my mouth, he groaned even louder, his body wiggling and I heard him pull at the handcuffs, wanting to touch me. I gripped his thighs as I moved my mouth slowly up and down, but keeping my eyes on him. He had closed his eyes, lost in the sensation of my tongue and teeth lightly grazing him. I got distracted and went too far, nearly gagging myself. I moved one hand to wrap around the base of his penis to give myself a buffer. Not much ruins a mood like puking on a guy. After a couple of minutes, I felt Ranger's body start to spasm and he cried out "Stephanie" as he came, the sound of metal clanking together telling me that he was pulling against the cuffs. His hips continued to buck a couple of times while I swallowed, the cherry oil helping to mask some of the unpleasant taste, and his breathing came out in ragged gasps.

I sat up and looked at Ranger, who has his eyes open and was looking at me with a mixture of desire and wonder. I reached over to the bedside table and found the key to the handcuffs and released Ranger's hands. He immediately put his hands on the sides of my face and pulled me down to kiss him.

"Did you enjoy that?" I asked as we broke apart, my own voice raspy with desire.

Ranger's eyes were still dilated black from being so aroused. "Babe, that was about the sexiest thing I've ever experienced."

He ran his hands up my chest, finding the ties that held the little camisole together. He pulled the ties and pushed the straps down my arm.

"Happy Birthday, Ranger," I told him, as his nimble fingers proceeded to get rid of my little lace thong.


	13. Here Without You

_A/N: I'm so sorry that this update took forever. Graduate school plus a full-time job plus motherhood have been in the way of writing for the past few weeks. I hope you enjoy this chapter and hope to have the next one up soon. _

By November, Ranger and I had fallen into a comfortable routine. He would spend two or three nights a week at my house, and I would spend a night or two at Rangeman each month. Wednesday date nights usually meant staying in with take-out, though on occasion we would go out to dinner or a movie. For my birthday in October, Ranger had given me a silver Rolex watch with diamonds around the face. The watch also doubled as a GPS and panic button, though you'd never know it to look at it. The watch was a lot like Ranger: pretty and practical.

Two weeks before Thanksgiving, Ranger informed me that he would be out of the country for a week or so on a security detail, but told me that he would be back in time for Thanksgiving. We'd been invited to dinner with my family on Thanksgiving Day, and dinner with his family the following day. I had been assured that dinner would only be his parents, Grandma Rosa, siblings and their families, so I could breathe a little easier.

During the week Ranger was out of town, there were an astronomical number of skips. Lula had actually worked with me late into a Saturday and most of the day on Sunday as we brought in skip after skip. We'd captured twenty and nine had escaped, but we worked hard to hunt them down. I had a black eye from Cameron Tonks, who had elbowed me in the face as he struggled out of my grip on his dilapidated front porch.

On the day Ranger was due to come home, Lula and I were hanging out in the No Man's Land section of Stark Street, watching an abandoned building where Tommy Harlow was rumored to be hiding.

"How much longer are we gonna sit here and wait on him to come out before we kick down the door and go get him?" Lula asked after we'd been sitting in the Cayenne for a little over an hour.

"We never kick down doors. Neither of us is that strong. Besides, we don't know who else is in that building, and I'm not interested in surprise meetings with drugged-out strangers," I told her. "He'll come out eventually."

But when Harlow hadn't made an appearance after another hour, I gave it up as a bad job and we moved the car to a nearby alley. I crossed my fingers and sent up a quick prayer that God or Rangeman wouldn't let my Cayenne get stolen. Lula and I got out of the car and started getting ready for the confrontation. I even got out the Glock that was in the compartment under the driver's seat and put it in my waist band, while my pepper spray was in my front pocket and my cuffs and stun gun were in the back pockets.

"You ready?" Lula asked, slinging her purse over her shoulder while holding her Glock in the other hand.

"Yep," I said. "Let's go get him."

Ten minutes later found us dragging Harlow out of the building and stuffing him into the backseat of the Cayenne. He had been on the second floor of the building and so strung out on whatever drug he had recently used that he hadn't even stirred when Lula put a bullet into the ceiling. We had checked for a pulse and thankfully found one. It had been about the most uneventful capture we'd had in a month, and I had been thankful. Ranger was due home in a few hours and I didn't want to see him for the first time in a week smelling like a dumpster or have any injuries that might have stood in the way of my fun.

When Ranger hadn't showed up at my house by nine that evening, I called his cell phone and it automatically went to voicemail. I called Rangeman, but was told Ranger hadn't checked in yet. I remembered that his exact words had been 'a week or so', which I interpreted to mean that he could be gone a few more days and that I'd been hasty in assuming he'd be home after a week.

I was anxious for Ranger to get back home as I finished out the work week with eight more captures.

"Vinnie's over the moon," Connie replied when I gave her the last of the body receipts. "He's been saying that he takes back all of the bad things he's ever said about you."

I rolled my eyes. "Sure, until I miss out on the next skip, then I'll be back to incompetent and bearing the future of the bond's office on my shoulders."

Lula emerged from the bathroom, having reapplied her lipstick and straightened her fuchsia wig.

"I think we need to go out tonight. I'm in the mood for strawberry daiquiris and some naked men," Lula commented, pulling her cell phone out of her purse. "Isn't there a new male revue club over in Atlantic City?"

"I'm really tired tonight," I told Lula. "Maybe we can do it next weekend."

"Next weekend will be Thanksgiving weekend. Traffic will be a nightmare," Connie replied.

I really didn't feel like going to a male revue. I wanted to go home and call Tank to figure out when Ranger would be coming home. It had been ten days since he left and I hadn't heard a word about when he'd be back. I was telling myself not to worry, but it wasn't working for me. With promises to go out after the holidays, I left the bond's office and decided to drive over to Rangeman. When Ranger was out of town, Tank inhabited his office as acting-boss.

I fobbed my way into the garage and went up to the fifth floor of Rangeman. As I walked through the control room, I noticed the room felt slightly more tense than usual. I wasn't sure if it was a sign of something having gone wrong, or merely discomfort at my being there. Some of the guys were a little uncomfortable around me, fearing that if they looked at me the wrong way Ranger might kill them.

I found Tank sitting at Ranger's desk, typing into the computer.

"Hey," I said, walking into the office. "I just wanted to see if there was any word on when Ranger is supposed to be back."

Tank tore his gaze away from the computer. "No, there isn't. I've been trying to get some details from the government, but they've shut me down. I'm talking to some sources of mine in the area to see if they can give me any information."

I immediately felt my stomach become uneasy. "Do you think something's wrong?" I asked, hoping his response would alleviate my worry.

Tank's eye flicked over to his computer for a minute. "The only time Ranger doesn't check in with me is when he's on a deep cover assignment, and he hasn't had one of those in a couple of years. This was a simple protection detail, but I haven't heard from him since the second day. And now with the contact at the State Department giving me the run-around, I'm starting to suspect something's up."

Not what I wanted to hear.

I took deep breath and blew it out, which jostled a stray curl that had fallen along my face. I took a moment to steady myself before I spoke. I hoped my voice would come out even and strong, not breaking with fear and the threat of tears.

"Is there anything I can do?" I managed to say, with my voice only squeaking on the last word.

Tank shook his head. "I'll call you when I know something."

I barely noticed as I retraced my steps back to the parking garage. I climbed back in the Cayenne and rested my head against the steering wheel, biting my lip in an effort not to burst into tears. The fact that Ranger had been incommunicado for eight days and counting made me fear the worst, especially when Tank was starting to worry. I knew Ranger was able to take care of himself in intense and dangerous situations, but it didn't keep me from worrying about him, especially when I didn't even know what country he was in. After a few tears had leaked out of my eyes and I'd taken several shaky breaths, I put the key in the ignition and pulled out of the garage, telling myself I wasn't going to worry about Ranger until I was told there was a reason to worry. I knew I'd fail at that effort, but at least I could justify that I'd tried to talk myself into it.

I spent Friday evening sitting in front of the television, trying not to think about Ranger but found that the only thing I could think about was Ranger. There was a knot in the pit of my stomach and I'd chewed my fingernails down to nubs. I wasn't certain, but I felt that not knowing anything was worse than knowing that Ranger was in a bad situation, though I could be proved wrong once I learned what was wrong. I had no chance of sleeping that night, and spent it tossing and turning while I watched the time on my alarm clock change minute by minute and inhaled the smell of Ranger's body wash on his pillow. By eight the next morning, I was showered, dressed and pacing my kitchen with my phone in my hands, debating whether or not to bother Tank that early in the morning. I had let myself worry so much overnight about Ranger's condition that I was nearly hysterical. I was about to start dialing Tank's number when my phone rang. The readout told me it was Tank's cell phone.

"What's wrong? What did you find out?" I asked as soon as I connected to the call.

"He was doing protection detail for someone in the State Department when their car was ambushed and they were captured by local rebels. Sounds like it happened not long after he checked in with me," Tank informed me, causing my heart to leap into my throat.

"Are—What—Who—," I couldn't seem to form a coherent sentence after my night of anxiety and the news that Ranger was kidnapped.

"The government is attempting to negotiate with them to get Ranger and the State guy back. Apparently we have a couple of their people in one of those secret CIA prisons in other countries that no one is supposed to know about, and they want to do a prisoner exchange."

"Is he ok?" I finally managed to articulate a sentence, albeit a short one.

"My source didn't know that. He's been getting information from one of his sources who is guarding Ranger and the other guy. I just know he said that they thought they would have what they wanted in the next few days," Tank replied.

My mind thought ahead to the next few days. We were due for Thanksgiving dinner with our families in a few days. Would he be back in time?

I nearly smacked myself for being so stupid and thinking about whether he'd be home in time for our first Thanksgiving as a couple. I needed to be concerned with whether he was going to come home at all. Damn, I needed to get some sleep.

"Does his family know? They are expecting us this week for the holiday," I told Tank, knowing that I would never be able to make the call to the Manosos that Ranger had been kidnapped in another country.

"I'll call his mother. We've had this protocol set up for years, in case his family is expecting him back for some reason and he can't be there. I'll just tell them I've been told his trip is extended and that he may not be back for Thanksgiving."

I disconnected with Tank a minute later, feeling numb and confused. I was almost trembling from the lack of sleep and stress over Ranger. I went back upstairs to the medicine cabinet and found some night time pain reliever. I popped two pills and went back into my bedroom and crawled into bed. Once I was under the covers and inhaling Ranger's scent once more, I let myself cry until I fell asleep.

Over the next several days, I did my best to not appear outwardly upset, in spite of the tightness that stayed in my chest. I had explained away Ranger's absence with the same line as Tank used on his family: his job had been extended and he wasn't sure when he would be back. My mother was disappointed that he wouldn't be home for Thanksgiving, blaming the government for overworking people even during the holidays. Lola Manoso had called me the day before Thanksgiving to tell me that even if Ranger didn't make it home in time, I was still welcome to come to dinner with them. I knew there was no way I could sit through dinner with the family, acting like nothing was wrong. I had thanked Lola, but told her that since Ranger hadn't returned, I had offered to babysit my nieces so that my sister could go Black Friday shopping.

I sat through Thanksgiving dinner with my family with a heavy heart, listening to my nieces bicker and talk about the silly things they did at school. Valerie attempted to grill me on Ranger and when we would get married, but I had shut her down immediately, giving her the same lecture I'd given my mother. I had just started helping my mother with dishes when I heard my cell phone ring.

"I just got the word that Ranger and the State Department employee have been released. Ranger should be home either Saturday or Sunday," Tank told me, almost making me collapse in relief.

"Is he ok? Why is it taking so long for him to get back home?" I asked, putting my hand over my heart, which was racing with excitement

"He's walking, I know that much. And he will have to be questioned to try to determine who had him, if they were able to get any confidential information out of him or the other guy, and stuff like that."

"You'll let me know as soon as he's back, right?" I asked, knowing I wanted to see him as soon as I could.

"Yep."

I spent the next two days eagerly awaiting a phone call from Tank or Ranger, but hadn't heard a word from either of them. When I opened my eyes on Sunday morning at the sound of my alarm, I found Ranger sitting on the bed next to me.

I gasped in surprise when I saw him. He had bruises and cuts on his face and dark circles under his eyes. He had lost weight and in general looked like he had been lost in the woods without supplies for a few days.

"Hey," I said, crawling over to him and hugging him. I felt his arms encircle my waist

"Hey," he replied, pressing a kiss into my hair.

After a minute, I pulled back and gave him a kiss, which he returned, though without his usual enthusiasm. I looked him over, running my finger along some of the areas on his face.

"How are you feeling? You look pretty banged up."

Ranger's expression remained neutral. "I'm feeling better than I did a few days ago, but it's nothing I can't handle."

I decided not to push the issue at that moment, since he had just gotten home, but I knew I would want to hear about what had happened to him.

"Right now, I just want to sleep," he continued, kicking off his shoes and pushing me back down in the bed. "You can go to Mass another time."

We stayed in bed for the rest of the morning, his arms wrapped around me. I dozed off and on while listening to his deep breathing as he slept. By eleven, I needed to answer the call of nature and get some coffee, so I quietly and gently extricated myself from his grasp and took care of business. I padded downstairs, started the coffee pot and decided pancakes sounded like a good breakfast. I wasn't sure if Ranger would be awake anytime soon, but I made extra pancakes just in case. I was just sitting down to smother my pancakes in butter and syrup when I heard him on the stairs.

"There's coffee and pancakes on the counter," I told him. "But I can make something else if you want."

Ranger shook his head and grabbed a mug for coffee. He brought his cup and plate of pancakes to the table and sat next to me, putting butter on his pancakes, but skipping the syrup.

We ate in silence and I tried to sneak a peek at him every so often, hoping I wasn't being obvious. I was burning with questions about where he had been and what he had been through, but fought to restrain myself. He had only been home for a few hours and I didn't want to make him relive the experience too soon.

After I finished my pancakes, I sat back in my chair and put a hand on Ranger's back and started rubbing circles. I felt him tense under my hand as I ran it over a spot where there felt to be a bandage under his shirt.

"Sorry," I muttered, taking my hand away.

I didn't know if he had any other injuries and didn't want to cause him anymore pain. He didn't say anything, but kept eating with a vigor I wasn't used to seeing out of him. Coupled with the noticeable weight loss, I came to the conclusion that what he experienced while captured included starvation.

Once he finished, he sat back in the chair and looked over at me. He didn't say anything, but the intensity of his gaze made me feel as though I were being x-rayed.

"Do you want to talk?" I asked tentatively. Ranger shook his head.

"No. You don't need to know about it."

Something in his words stung me. He didn't want to share what he had been through with me, despite the fact that it seemed to have been terrible, based on his physical appearance. God only knew what may have happened to him psychologically. The way he said it had made me feel like a child being told by her father that she was too little to understand something complex. I bit my tongue—literally— and reminded myself not to get offended. He just got home. Give him some space.

Ranger stood and carried out plates to the sink, rinsing them before putting them in the dishwasher. I put away the condiments and stood next to him at the sink.

"What can I do?" I asked, feeling a bit helpless.

Ranger put the last piece of silverware in the dishwasher and shut it, stopping to dry his hands on a towel before answering my question.

"Kiss me," he said simply, pulling me gently into him and pressing his lips to mine. I returned the kiss, putting my hands on his sides, which caused him to wince.

"Broken ribs," he reported before trying to kiss me again. I pulled back, not feeling particularly romantic at the moment.

"What injuries do you have? I can see the cuts and bruises to your face and I felt a bandage on your back, and now you tell me you have broken ribs. Anything else?"

"Nothing major. Just a lot of cuts, scrapes and bruises," he replied.

I looked at him, wanting to argue, but the look on his face stopped me. He was determined to not discuss what happened at the moment, but I knew I wouldn't be able to let it go when it was something so big.

The rest of the day was spent lying around watching television. Ranger didn't speak unless spoken to, and his responses were short—only speaking in sentences if absolutely necessary. The rest of the time he seemed to be in a daze, only vaguely aware of his surroundings. The atmosphere of the room was awkward and tense. I wasn't sure what to expect out of Ranger and how I should act. Oddly enough, I didn't feel that I could act happy to see him, as though I were expected to remain somber. It felt like I had just attended a young person's funeral, and now was at the wake, but couldn't look too happy out of respect for the dead.

I ordered Chinese for dinner and we ate in silence, after which Ranger went upstairs and I heard the shower start running. I contemplated joining him, but then thought better of it. Outside of a couple of brief kisses, Ranger had not initiated any sexual or physical contact. He had put his arm around me while we sat on the couch, but I couldn't cuddle up against him too much without hurting his ribs.

We were in bed by nine that night, having nothing to talk about and no physical activity to distract us. I knew with his broken ribs that he may not feel like having sex, but even just a few kisses and smutty innuendos would have appreciated. Twenty-four hours prior, I had thought that when Ranger came home, I would be incredibly happy and we wouldn't be likely to leave the bed for two days. The harsh reality was that I felt like someone else had come back to me. Ranger's emotional detachment seemed more exaggerated than I had ever seen it. In the few months we had been a couple, I'd seen him open up to me more than I thought possible. It now felt like we had made a major regression.

I had fallen asleep at some point, but was startled awake when I felt Ranger move suddenly. I sat up in bed and saw that he was sitting up, alert and scanning the room. I noticed his skin was glistening with sweat and he was breathing heavily.

"Ranger? What's wrong?"

When I spoke, Ranger's gaze rested on me. He didn't speak, but seemed to be processing my presence. After a minute, he shook his head and went to get out of bed.

"Nothing. Go back to sleep," he said as he walked out of the bedroom. I heard him head downstairs and ran after him. By the time I caught up to him, he was in the kitchen and pulling a beer out of the fridge.

"What happened? Did you have a nightmare?" I asked, watching him open the beer and start drinking it as he leaned against the counter. He was clad only in black sweat pants, which allowed me to see more bruises and cuts in various stages of healing on his chest and abdomen.

"Don't worry about it. Go back to bed."

I put my hands on my hips and stood my ground. "No way. Don't tell me not to worry about it. I cannot stop worrying about it because you are being so closed off and strange. Something major happened to you and you won't open up to me. I think you need to talk about this. You need to tell me what happened so I can try to help you."

The expression on Ranger's face changed into the one I recognized as his deadly-calm-I'm-really-pissed-off look. He didn't move a muscle, except to take a long drag from his beer. He held my gaze, trying to wear me down into backing off and going to bed, but I wasn't backing down. After a couple of minutes, in which time he finished the beer, Ranger finally spoke.

"Stephanie, when we first got together, I told you there were things I couldn't talk about with you, and you agreed not to push me on those situations. This is one of them."

"Bullshit," I said. "I don't believe you can't tell me about it. You just don't want to, but I'm not letting you get away with it. You need to tell me. It's clearly eating you up inside. Don't you think I've heard and experienced enough bad shit to be able to handle what you went through? It's worse on me watching you suffer in silence like this."

Ranger took a couple of steps and set the beer bottle on the island between us and resting his hands on the edge.

"I'm not talking about it Stephanie. That's final. Don't push me on it."

"I will continue to push you until you op—,"

"GODDAMN IT, STEPHANIE!"

My words were cut off by Ranger throwing the beer bottle against the refrigerator, the glass shards flying everywhere, though luckily not hitting either of us. The look on Ranger's face was utterly terrifying. I felt my throat close up and I backed away from the island and towards the living room. I knew I was pushing him, and I expected him to get angry, but I never realized how frightening I would find his raw anger. I had never heard Ranger speak with such anger or volume. He never yelled. His version of yelling had always consisted of a deadly-calm, which I had thought much worse than yelling. I had been wrong.

For the first time since I had met him, I was truly afraid of Ranger.

It felt like hours ticked by as we stood looking at each other; Ranger's breathing was deep and slow while I was nearly hyperventilating. After some indeterminable amount of time, Ranger spoke, his features and voice resuming their customary neutrality.

"Go back to bed, Stephanie. I'll clean this up."

I didn't argue that time, but turned heel and hurried back upstairs. I went into the bathroom and checked out my reflection in the mirror. Ignoring my bed-hair-from-hell, I saw that I was paler than usual and my eyes were bright with tears. I gave myself a couple of minutes to regroup before I left the bathroom and went back to bed. I could hear the sound of glass being dumped into the trash and I lay in bed waiting for Ranger to come back up, wondering if I should apologize for pushing him. He was right about the agreement I had made with him about not pushing him to talk about things, but I knew something had to give. We couldn't go on living like this for more than a couple of days before I would lose my mind, and God only knows what might happen to him.

I never heard Ranger come back to bed, and when my alarm sounded at seven the next morning, I was surprised to realize I had been able to go back to sleep. I rolled over, but found Ranger's side of the bed empty. I went downstairs to see if Ranger was in the kitchen or living room, but found it empty. A peek out my kitchen window showed his car wasn't parked behind my garage. Thinking he may have felt like going back to Rangeman, I decided to shower and get ready for the day before calling him to see how he was doing. I was starting to feel bad about pushing him so much, and didn't blame him for his reaction, but I knew he couldn't always keep such things bottled up inside him. No one could live like that, and no should have to do it. He had me to talk to, and I could be trusted with his secrets. Maybe he needed to be reminded of that.

When I got out of the shower, I realized that something felt off in the bathroom. I couldn't place the issue, but I felt like something was missing. Unable to figure out what was up, I wrapped a towel around my body and went into the bedroom and opened my closet. I had been staring at my clothes for a minute or so before realizing there was an issue in my closet as well.

Ranger's clothes were gone.

He had started keeping some clothes and toiletries at my house for the nights when he slept over, so I had become used to their presence. I went to my dresser where he kept socks and underwear and found it empty as well. It dawned on me that what had been missing in the bathroom had been his razor, toothbrush and shower gel.

I sat down on the bed and found that the knot that had lived in my stomach while Ranger was MIA had returned. Only this time, it was probably my fault the knot was there. I hated myself for pushing him to the point that he felt the need to leave. The fact that he took his clothes and toiletries made me worried that he wasn't coming back. I hadn't considered that pushing him when he told me not to would be a relationship deal-breaker.

Don't panic, Steph. Just call him, I told myself.

I grabbed my cell phone and called his phone. It immediately went to voicemail. I didn't bother to leave a message, but hung up and called his apartment at Rangeman. It rang four times before someone picked up.

"Hello?" It wasn't Ranger, but Ella.

"Ella, it's Stephanie. Is Ranger there?"

"No, dear. I've been told he's out of town."

I felt bile rise up in my throat. "Do you know where he went? Or how long he'll be gone?"

"No, Stephanie. All I was told was that he left town. Didn't he tell you where he was going?"

Tears sprang to my eyes at her words.

"Can you connect me to Tank from that phone, or do I need to dial the office directly?" I asked, not answering her question.

"Sure, dear. I can do that for you. Hold on," Ella said, her tone a little too understanding.

I bit my lip as I waited for Tank to pick up the phone. The situation was looking to be worse than I expected. He'd not only left me, but left town. Was I really that bad? Did I really push him that far? Then my mind started to churn, and the question came to mind about whether Ranger may have left town to commit suicide. I was telling myself that he wouldn't do such a thing when Tank picked up.

"Where did he go? Why did he leave? When's he coming back?" I asked immediately, feeling a little bit of déjà vu from our conversation a week before.

Tank didn't speak for a minute. Probably figuring out what he would tell me.

"He didn't tell me where he was going or when he would be back. He just said he needed to decompress from his assignment, and he'd be offline."

"Can you please track his phone or the GPS in his car and tell me where he went? I just want to talk to him," I pleaded.

Tank made a noise. "He disables the GPS in his phone and car whenever he needs to complete get away. I doubt I could track him no matter how hard I tried. I think he just needs his space right now."

With those words, the tears started falling down my cheeks. I'd really fucked it up this time.


	14. How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?

_A/N: I adore you, my readers. Here's another chapter for you, though I should warn you that things will get dark in this chapter and may make some people uncomfortable. _

I made my way into the bond's office a little after eleven, having spent a couple of hours fretting over Ranger. I had put on full make-up and extra mascara to hide the pain I was feeling. I knew Connie and Lula would be asking if Ranger were back yet, and I was debating about what to tell them. I actually wanted to talk about the situation with Connie, but didn't want to divulge everything to Lula. She wasn't exactly known to be a pinnacle of discretion.

"Strolling in at eleven? Girl, you must have had some weekend. I can't believe you can walk that well," Lula announced as soon as I walked in the door.

Exactly why I didn't care to inform her that I ran my boyfriend off with my pushy ways.

"Not exactly," I said, taking a seat at the chair in front of Connie's desk and picking up the stack of skips waiting for me. "He came home yesterday morning, but then had to leave again last night. I'm not sure when he'll be back."

Lula had been filing her nails and stopped when I told her Ranger was gone again. "Say what? He's gone again? You sure he don't have another woman stashed away somewhere? Maybe he's one of those men who got more than one family and he has to split his time between them."

Connie rolled her eyes. "Did he say what he was doing? It seems odd that he'd get called away on another government job so quickly."

I gave Connie a significant look at Lula couldn't see. "I think it was more to do with Rangeman than his contract with the government."

Connie nodded that she understood. "I'm getting hungry. What do we want to do for lunch?"

After Lula stated she wanted chicken and volunteered to go to Cluck in a Bucket, I immediately began informing Connie about what had really happened with Ranger on his trip and about how I had pushed him for information and how he left in the night without a word.

"Maybe he's suffering Posttraumatic Stress or something. It sounds like whatever he went through was really bad," she suggested.

I pondered that for a moment. I hadn't considered something like PTSD before, but it might make sense. Connie and l looked up PTSD on Wikipedia and found that Ranger met all of the criteria for it, but because it had been less than a month since the traumatic event he experienced, it was called Acute Stress Disorder. As we read and discussed, I felt more and more like a complete shit for pushing him.

By the time Lula had returned with lunch, my guilt had reached an all-time high, but Connie and I had moved our topic of conversation on to a rumor about Peggy Jones, a girl that Connie and I had gone to school with, and the story that was going around the Burg that her husband had run off with the babysitter, Jolene. I managed to choke down a piece of chicken and a Coke before going out on my first skip of the day, which was a seventy-eight year old man who had been arrested for stealing Metamucil from the drug store.

For the next two weeks, my daily schedule followed the same pattern. I woke up in the morning, tried to call Ranger, got his voicemail, cried in the shower, chased down idiots who failed to show for court, went home, tried to call Ranger, got his voicemail, cried some more, ate some dessert and went to bed, only to start the cycle over again the next morning.

I'd given the 'called away again' story to my family whenever my mother asked about him.

"How are you going to be able to get married and have children if he is gone all the time?" She had asked more than once.

After two weeks of not hearing from Ranger, I was starting to lose my mind. I had been laying awake at night trying to figure out where he might be. I knew he had a safe house in North Trenton, but I wasn't sure where it was and I didn't think he would be so obvious as to go somewhere he could be easily found by Tank. I'd called the Miami office and talked to Silvio, who told me Ranger wasn't down there either nor had there been any activity on any of his credit cards. I remembered Ranger had once told me he had a house in Maine, but that was another place I would surely never be able to find. He had offered that to me as a place to stay back in the days when I was first getting to know him, when the only address I had for him was a vacant lot. Even though I'd know him for five years now, I still felt like I barely knew him. Back then he had been incredibly mysterious: kicking ass and taking names by day and protecting Trenton from bad guys by night, holed away in the elusive Batcave—

Hold the phone, I thought as I sat bolt upright in bed. The Batcave—his apartment in Newark. It was a place that very few people knew about and the place he allowed himself to be at home. I couldn't believe I hadn't thought about it before, especially since I had just been there over the summer.

I leapt out of bed and started getting dressed in a pair of jeans, a blue sweater and boots. I looked out my bedroom window and saw that there was about two inches of snow on the ground already, and the forecast said to expect at least eighteen inches. We were having an early snow storm this year, but I wasn't going to let it stop me from trying to see Ranger. I grabbed a duffle bag and packed a few days worth of clothes and toiletries. Even if Ranger wasn't at the apartment, I likely wouldn't be able to get back to Trenton for a day or two and would have to stay in a hotel. I went downstairs, grabbed a couple of bottles of water and provisional snacks in case I got stranded, threw a packet of hamster nuggets in my purse and picked up Rex's cage before I headed out the door. If all else failed and I had to stay in a hotel for a couple of days, I'd have to smuggle Rex in with me.

Glancing at the clock on my dashboard, I realized it was almost eleven and that I wouldn't be to Newark before midnight, likely much later considering the weather. I knew the apartment was number 1210, but couldn't remember if there was a doorman or a buzzer to gain entrance to the building. As I drove, I began to realize that driving out of town in the middle of the night in the middle of a blizzard to a place where Ranger may not even be wasn't the smartest thing I'd ever done. I didn't even know where to park, as I hadn't paid attention to the passcode he entered for the underground garage. Once I reached the outskirts of Trenton, I started preparing myself for what I would tell Ranger if he was indeed at the apartment. My first goal was to apologize for pushing him and promise not to do it again. Then I'd ask him what I could do to help him get through this. I was becoming more and more aware that some serious shit had gone down while he was in captivity, more than just a few beatings and being starved. I had the feeling there had been some psychological torture involved…and possibly sexual assault. The idea had crossed my mind the night before as I lay awake trying to figure out what could disrupt the zen calm that was Ranger. He wasn't easily rattled by a physical beating or hurtful words and threats. The idea had made me sick —not towards Ranger, but over what he may have experienced and how he must be feeling. I remembered how awful I'd felt when York had gotten close to raping me over the summer and how disgusting I had felt after he put his hands on me. I don't know how awful I would have felt if he'd actually raped me.

It took me three hours to get to Newark, and once I finally made it to the city limits, I realized that I had no freaking clue how to find Ranger's building. I remembered the diner we'd gone to for breakfast had been on the same street as his building, but all I could remember of the diner's name was that it had the word "Diner" in it, so I fired up the GPS to help me find every restaurant with 'Diner' in the name, and I could check out the area to see if it looked familiar. That had taken me another two hours, but I eventually found the building. I drove around for fifteen minutes, trying to find a public lot to park in, but all of them were either full or were closed. Street parking was off-limits due to the expected snow fall and the need for the plow trucks to get through.

I took a chance and pulled up the keypad that opened the gate to the underground garage to Ranger's building. I remembered that he had punched in a four digit number, so I tried his apartment number, but it didn't open the gate. I tried the month and day of his birthday, but that didn't do it either. I tried the year he was born, my birthdate, 1234, 0000 and 9999, but none of those worked either. Finally, remembering what I had done for my security code, I entered the month and day that Ranger and I had met. As soon as I hit the last number, the gate had started opening. I drove into the garage and looked around for Ranger's car and also any spots that might be designated for guests. The guest spots were located on the street level of the parking garage, but I continued down another level until I found Ranger's Cayenne parked in a spot on the second level. Feeling good that I hadn't driven around for five hours in a snow storm for nothing, I turned around and went back to the guest spots and parked.

"I'm going up to talk to Ranger, but I'll come back down for you in a while," I told Rex, putting my duffle bag in the seat next to him.

I didn't want to appear presumptuous by lugging a bag and my hamster up to the apartment before I could ascertain whether he would even open the door for me, let alone talk to me or let me stay. I got on the elevator and hit the twelve button. The elevator didn't stop once between the parking garage and the twelfth floor, which made me remember that it was a nearly four-thirty in the morning and most people, including Ranger, would be asleep. When the elevator doors finally opened up, I stepped out into the quiet hallways and turned right towards Ranger's apartment. When I arrived outside of his door, I pressed my ear to it, listening for any sign that he might be awake. I couldn't hear any sounds coming from inside the apartment, so I knocked on the door, trying not to wake up neighbors, but wanting to be sure Ranger heard me the first time. About thirty seconds after I knocked, I heard something behind the door, and assumed he was looking out the peephole. A second later, the locks tumbled and the door opened, revealing a bedraggled and surprised Ranger. He was wearing black sweat pants and no shirt, which revealed that many of the bruises I'd seen on his body two weeks before had faded and the cuts had mostly healed.

"Hey," I said quietly, holding his gaze as he continued to look down at me in mild wonder.

"Hey," he replied, rubbing his eyes. "How did you know I was here?"

I shrugged. "Lucky guess. It hit me a few hours ago that you might be here, so I took a chance and came up here."

"You drove up here in the middle of a snow storm on a chance?"

I nodded. "I wanted to see you and talk to you. I couldn't stand one more night worrying about you."

Ranger grabbed my hand and pulled me into the apartment and shut the door behind me. It was pitch black in the apartment, but he guided me through to the bedroom, where he turned on a bedside lamp and sat down on the edge of the bed. I took off my coat and sat down next to him.

"I'm really sorry about what happened," I began. "I was wrong to push you, and you were right to get upset with me. I promised you I wouldn't push you, but I did—,"

Ranger put a finger on my lips, signaling for me to be quiet. "Don't apologize, Stephanie. You did the right thing in this case. I needed to get help, but couldn't bring myself to accept that. It wasn't until you pushed me and I blew up at you and saw how much I scared you that I realized I couldn't handle this on my own this time."

I felt my jaw drop. That was not the response I had been expecting. I'd been prepared for Ranger to dismiss me, tell me I broken our agreement and that he couldn't be in a relationship with someone he couldn't trust to keep a promise.

"Have you been getting help?" I asked quietly, still in shock from the way the conversation had turned out.

Ranger nodded. "I've needed to meet with a psychologist to work through something that happened once before, so I've come up here to meet with him again. I've been seeing him three times a week for the past two weeks."

My eyebrows shot up at the pronouncement that Ranger had been seeing a psychologist for his issues. Part of me was happy that he was getting help with working through the trauma, but another part of me was slightly hurt that he didn't feel that I could give him similar comfort. I had a jumble of questions running through my head, but they varied so much and could lead us down several different paths of conversation, I had to consider which avenue I wanted to take.

"And it's helping you?" I finally asked, having decided to continue with Ranger's current emotional well-being as the topic.

Ranger considered me for a moment before nodding slowly. "Yes, talking to Dr. Rodriguez has helped me get my thoughts in order and helped me to get my feelings about what happened in check. He wants to keep seeing me next week to make sure everything stays on track, but told me after that we could switch to phone therapy as needed. He thinks I'm on a good path to recovery and not headed into a posttraumatic stress situation, since I came to him so soon after it happened."

I nodded, but didn't speak. I hadn't broken eye contact with Ranger while he had been talking, and I knew that I was silently asking the question of whether he would tell me what had happened.

Ranger ran his hand along the side of my face, stopping to cup my chin and pull me towards him for a kiss. It was brief, but warm and tender.

"I'll tell you, but not right now. Let's just sleep. You look exhausted," he whispered as he rested his forehead against mine.

I nodded. "I have to go down and get Rex and my bag out of my car first."

Ranger stood and grabbed a t-shirt off the chair in the corner of the room. "I'll go down and get them. You get in bed."

I told him where I was parked, kicked off my shoes and took off my sweater and jeans. I rummaged in Ranger's dresser for a t-shirt and pulled it on over my head. I went to the bathroom and by the time I was climbing into bed, I heard Ranger coming back into the apartment. I thought I heard him put Rex's cage on the kitchen counter, and a moment later he appeared in the bedroom.

Once he'd thrown my bag into the corner chair, Ranger took off his shirt and sweat pants before crawling into bed clad only in his boxer-briefs. I managed to refrain from groaning due to the fact that Ranger and I hadn't had sex in a month. He turned off the light on the bedside table and pulled me close to him, kissing my head as he wrapped his arms around me. The sound of his easy breathing and the feel of his arms around me helped me fall asleep quickly. By the time I woke up several hours later, there was bright nearly-winter sunshine coming in through the curtains. Ranger's spot was empty, but I could hear noise in the kitchen. I climbed out of bed and walked out of the bedroom towards the noise. Ranger was pouring coffee into two mugs as I walked in. He handed one to me and started sipping his own. I glanced at the clock on the stove, which told me it was almost eleven.

"Did you sleep well?" I asked.

Ranger scanned my body, which was covered only with his t-shirt and my blue Victoria's Secret panties.

"I did. I've missed sleeping next to you."

I smiled at him, glad to see him more relaxed and back his old self, and in return I was treated to a thinking-about-smiling smile from Ranger. I put my cup down on the counter and walked towards him, wrapping my arms gently around his waist. He repeated the move and we stood in that position for several minutes, enjoying the feel of being in each other's arms again. The smell of Ranger's shower gel mixed with his natural scent made me feel at ease for the first time in a month.

We eventually broke apart and prepared a brunch for ourselves, eating in a more comfortable silence than we had done two weeks ago, but still not quite back to our norm. I quietly pondered when Ranger would tell me about his time in captivity, and worked to prepare myself for a horrific story. Once we had cleared our places and washed the dishes, Ranger guided me into the living room and we sat down on the leather sofa. His expression was neutral and calm, so I knew he was mentally preparing himself for a difficult story.

"Are you sure you want to know this?" Ranger asked, watching me closely. "It's not a pleasant story."

No shit.

"Yes, I want to hear it, if you are willing to tell me," I informed him, meeting his gaze. I didn't want him to think I was afraid of what I might hear, or that I may judge him harshly.

Ranger nodded and leaned back against the couch. I noticed he wasn't touching me in any way and wondered what it meant. Normally, even if we were just sitting on the couch, his leg might be touching mine, if nothing else. The distance between us made feel me that we were both incredibly vulnerable in that moment.

"I was providing security detail for a representative from the State department in Somalia. It was supposed to be a quiet visit with some politicians in the rural areas to help stabilize the government and work towards bringing back diplomatic representation to the area. We had just left our first meeting when our car was ambushed by rebels who are fighting against the government. We were outnumbered in both people and guns, so instead of guaranteeing our deaths by trying to fight them, we went quietly with the hope that they would negotiate our release with the government. Two of their people had been taken into CIA custody as possible terrorists and were being held at a black site in Eastern Europe, so we were being used as leverage."

" For the first couple of days, things weren't too bad. They smacked us around a little and didn't feed us, but I'd been through worse. Once they realized that the U.S. government wasn't taking them seriously, they upped their ante. They locked us in rooms with no light or sound and would come and beat us at random. They used psychological torture techniques and would act like they were going to execute us, but would fire the round right past our heads and in to the ground or the wall. They used a variety of torture techniques that are designed to cause significant pain without leaving lasting damage, including waterboarding."

Ranger stopped speaking, but I knew he wasn't finished. He was steeling himself for more, so I waited quietly for him to continue.

"Finally, in the last couple of days before we were released, they turned to—um, using various tools to—to—sodomize us," he finished, saying the last words with a breathless, almost-anguished tenor. "We were starving, dehydrated, exhausted and close to losing our minds, and then they started humiliating us like that. I've been captured and tortured before, but never for this length of time or severity. The thing that made it harder was thinking of you and Julie. At first, I'd think of you and it kept me strong, determined that I'd come home to see you again. But the longer I was there all I could think about was how you'd feel when they finally killed me. I thought about all the years I didn't fight for you and let you stay with Morelli because I thought it was best. I wished we'd had more time together and questioned whether you would go back to him once I was dead. Then I'd think about how Julie and I had gotten closer in the past couple of years, and wondered whether she'd be hurt when I wasn't around any longer. Then I worried that you both might be in danger because of me, and I thought towards the end of my time there that it would have been better for both of you if I'd never been a part of your lives."

I had a lump in my throat by the time Ranger stopped speaking. I knew the situation had to have been a nightmare for him, and that as much as I had tried to prepare myself for the story, it still felt like someone had run a sword through my chest. Seeing Ranger look so pained and hearing the horror in his voice were things I never thought possible of him. But I knew that if anyone could get through something that terrible, it would be him. He was the toughest person I'd ever met, and the fact that something could get to him only made me love him more, because it reminded me that he was still human, no matter how tough the exterior.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you," I finally said through the lump in my throat.

I reached out and touched his hand tentatively, gauging whether I could get closer, or if he preferred that I kept my distance. When he squeezed my hand and looked back at me once more, I scooted across the sofa and put my arms around his neck, pulling him close to me. I felt him wrap his arms around my waist and he pulled me into his lap. I ran my fingers through his hair and ran my nails along the base of his neck. I felt him take a couple of deep, shuddering breaths as we sat there together. I placed small kisses on his temple and cheek as I pulled back to look at him. I knew there were tear tracks down my cheeks and found that Ranger's eyes bright with tears as well. I kissed him on the forehead and nose before moving to his lips.

"What can I do?" I whispered. "Please tell me what I can do to help you."

Ranger ran a finger along my collarbone as he spoke. "Are you ashamed of me?"

"Ashamed? About what?" I asked, completely nonplussed.

"For blowing up at you when you tried to talk to me about this stuff, for leaving you in the middle of the night without a word. For getting into that situation, for not fighting harder against them. Especially when they…," he trailed off, but I knew he was referring to the point when he'd been sodomized.

I tilted his chin up so that he would have to look me in the eye. "Carlos Manoso, I am not, and will never be, ashamed of you. I'm awe of you, in the fact that you made it back home alive. You didn't give up and you came home to me. I'm not angry or upset with you for what happened at my house. I should have known better than to push you, but you had also just been through a trauma and you just were trying to cope with it. Ultimately, it boils down to I love you, and I will do anything to help you."

I saw something that looked like a flicker of relief wash over Ranger's face. He brought a hand up to my face and pushed my hair back before pressing his lips to mine once more. He deepened our kiss this time, gently pushing him tongue into my mouth and pulling me closer to him. After a minute or so, he pulled away again.

"Thank you," he muttered. "I've needed to hear that. I've been worried about how you might feel about what happened—that you might not want me any longer."

I wanted him to understand that I didn't think any less of him because he had been assaulted. I never could have imagined Ranger feeling so ashamed about something that he couldn't control, but I imagined it must be common in those who have been raped.

"Please, Ranger. The day I stop wanting you is the day they put me in the ground. I had to refrain from drooling all over you last night when you climbed into bed in nothing but your boxers."

Ranger smiled a little sadly. "But you didn't know the story then."

I shrugged. "Nothing's changed. I still want to drool all over you, for as long as you'll have me."

That earned me a full on smile.

"Babe."

_A/N: This was a difficult topic to broach, but I felt it was important. Men account for 10% of sexual assault and rape victims in the U.S., according to the RAINN (Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network) website, and the psychological effects can be damaging in the long-term if help isn't sought out immediately. Often times, people tend to forget that rape and sexual violence isn't always geared towards women. I know this was a dark chapter, but it has opened up a new door in Stephanie and Ranger's relationship and will push them towards better things. Thanks for reading. _


	15. I Believe In You and Me

A/N: Thanks to all of my wonderful readers. Sorry for the delay in this chapter, but moving, illness and a mini-vacation made April zoom by. Your input on this story and the experiences of the characters is appreciated. *Please see my profile for details of writing parts of this story from Ranger's POV and your input. *

After Ranger's details of his capture in Somalia and some quality time spent holding one another, I went into the bedroom with the intention of doing some internet research on my laptop. I wanted to learn more about rape victims, males in particular, and how their loved ones could help them through the trauma.

I dug my laptop out of my duffle bag and headed towards the bed, pausing when a silver picture frame on Ranger's bedside table caught my eye. It hadn't been there when we'd been in the apartment over the summer, as I remembered that the only pictures had been on the living room wall. I walked over and picked it up. It was of Ranger and me at his parents' anniversary party. Celia had insisted on a picture early in the day, before the nonsense with the cousin, so my hair and make-up still looked good. Ranger had his arm around my waist and we were both smiling, looking relaxed and happy. It was nice to see us in this light, and it made me feel even better that he'd put a picture of me in his apartment. Car keys and bullets weren't exactly romantic mementos of a girlfriend.

I replaced the picture and crawled on the bed, propping myself up against the headboard. I fired up my computer and opened up two internet tabs. One was for my search on male rape victims and the other was opened to Pinterest. I created a new board called "Recipes" and had the recipe section open for legitimate reading. I didn't want Ranger to come across me researching male rape victims, so I would have the other tab open in case he came in the room. I could click on it instead to keep things from becoming any more awkward than they already were. I'd been reading on a couple of websites for about half an hour when Ranger walked into the room. I discreetly closed out the web search and perused the recipes on Pinterest.

"Have you finally decided to stop living on birthday cake and peanut butter and olive sandwiches?" Ranger asked as he climbed into bed next to me and looked at my computer screen.

"Yes, it's another step in my growing up plan. I need to start cooking real meals."

The unspoken comment in the room was that there was a step before the cooking step —it was called "create an actual kitchen" step. I was seriously lacking on cooking tools. I only had one pot and a cookie sheet. Martha Stewart, I am not.

"That's a good idea, babe, but how about also adding 'eating healthier' to that particular step? Fried cheese balls aren't exactly a meal. They barely qualify as something fit for human consumption," Ranger said.

"Just because you don't eat them doesn't mean that they aren't fit for human consumption. You barely qualify as human most days. You're more of human-superhero hybrid."

"I'm just a man, babe. A man with healthy habits who is in love with a woman who eats like a frat boy and avoids exercise like it's an STD."

I rolled my eyes at Ranger, ignoring the fact that he was right.

"What were you really looking at?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked, putting on my best innocent expression.

"You wouldn't have come in here just to look at Pinterest. You would have brought your computer to the living room and sat with me. You wanted privacy, so you came in here. I imagine you had two internet tabs open, one with Pinterest and one with whatever you were looking at, and when I came in you closed the latter."

Fucking know-it-all.

"I wanted to give you some space," I told him. "I didn't want you to feel overwhelmed by me being here, so I came in here to relax and look at Pinterest."

Ranger snatched my computer quickly from me and pulled up my internet history. Thank God I had been smart enough to search the information on rape victims in one of those private browsers that doesn't show up on your computer history. I hadn't been an occasional Rangeman employee for nothing.

"I'm impressed, babe. You used a private browser so it won't show up in your history. I've taught you well."

I love Ranger, I really do, but there are times when I also hate him for being so good at everything. This was one of those times.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I told him, taking my computer back. "I was just searching Pinterest for recipes and giving you some space."

Ranger watched me for a minute, and I felt an unease grow between us. What did he think I was searching? Did he realize the truth, or did he assume worse? Dating websites? Tips on how to break up with your boyfriend who just got raped while being held hostage by crazed Somalians?

"What?" I finally asked, unable to bear the tension any longer. "What's wrong?"

Ranger laid down on the bed and looked at the ceiling. "I need you to be honest with me, Stephanie. Now is not the time to hide things from me."

"What do you think I'm hiding?"

"If you can't handle being with me after I told you about what happened in Somalia, I'll understand, but please tell me now. Don't drag it out for weeks or months."

My heart felt heavy after he finished speaking. He was worried I would leave him, even though I told him I wouldn't. Ranger had seen me go through a lot of shit, but he apparently questioned whether this would be the thing that would be too much for me, and that I'd end up walking away from our relationship.

I watched him for a moment before opening up the browser and typing in the search I had completed. I brought up the two webpages I'd been reading from and put the computer in Ranger's lap.

"There —that's what I was searching when you walked in, and I closed it out so that you wouldn't feel awkward."

Ranger sat up in bed and pulled the computer with him. The first webpage was from a rape advocacy group and talked about ways to help loved ones who have been sexually assaulted deal with the trauma. The other page was a scholarly article about the psychological effect of rape on male victims. Ranger scanned both pages briefly before closing the browser and then the computer.

"Why not ask me if you have questions?" he finally asked.

"Because I can tell you aren't telling me the whole story, and I feel like there may be things that I can do for you that you don't realize or think you need. I just want to help you."

Ranger picked up my hand and kissed the palm before getting up and leaving the room without saying a word.

Seriously? This was the time he was choosing to not say anything? I was sitting there debating about whether to follow him or to go back to Pinterest when he came back into the bedroom.

"I have an appointment to see Dr. Rodriguez tomorrow and then again on Friday. I just called to ask him if he thought he could answer some of your questions and he said yes. He wants to meet with you for the last half of my session tomorrow," Ranger finished.

Whoa, not what I was expecting. Did I want to talk to his therapist about this? I'd never talked to a therapist before, so talking to one about something so personal and serious was a bit daunting. I couldn't see myself lying on a couch talking to a faceless man who kept asking me how I was feeling about stuff and if it related to my relationship with my father. But Ranger trusted this man, and he trusted very few people. And since he probably knew what he was doing, he could answer my specific questions better than the internet could.

"That would be good. I think he could be helpful, though how we're going to get to your appointment tomorrow is beyond me unless you've got the Rangeman dogsled team on stand-by downstairs. There's about two feet of snow on the ground."

Ranger shook his head. "His office is just down the road, though he can't get there. He told me he was willing to come to the apartment for our session tomorrow and Friday, if necessary, since he said he lives in the area. I happen to know that he lives on the fourth floor of this building, but he isn't aware that I know."

I nodded. The therapist probably only treated Ranger because he was well aware that Ranger was rarely ever in the apartment and the chance of them running into each other in the lobby or garage was unlikely. It probably helped ease his mind to know that Ranger wasn't going to start stalking him or try to be his best friend.

The rest of the day was spent watching television and relaxing. I updated him on the FTAs I had captured while he was away and that I hadn't ended up going to Thanksgiving with his family since he wasn't home. He told me he had called his mother and made up an excuse that his trip had been extended and he hadn't been able to call her himself. He wasn't sure if she believed him or not, but he didn't think she'd push him on it. She knew he had to keep much of his work confidential. We went to bed that night much like we had the night before. Ranger made no sexual contact and while he had his arm around my waist, his body was not pressed against mine like it normally was when we slept next to one another. Around three in the morning, I was awakened by Ranger groaning in his sleep and waking up with a gasping breath. Remembering what had happened at my house a couple of weeks earlier, I stayed still and listened to him as he sat up in bed and worked to settle his breathing. I kept my eyes closed, letting him decide whether or not he wanted to wake me up. I heard him get out of bed and walk out of the room. A few seconds later, I heard the sound of water running in the distance. I wasn't sure how much time had passed, but I laid awake until Ranger came back to bed. He didn't put an arm around me, but laid on his side with his back to me. His breathing had resumed its normal, steady pace, so it was impossible to tell if he was still awake or finally gone back to sleep. I found myself unable to go back to sleep and eventually decided to get up. I tried to slip out of bed quietly, hoping Ranger was asleep, but as soon as I had sat up in bed, I heard his voice.

"Sorry I woke you," he said quietly.

"You didn't wake me," I said as I stood up. "I have to go to the bathroom."

"Liar. You've been awake as long as I have. I could tell by your breathing."

I walked towards the bedroom door. "I'm going to the bathroom. Go back to sleep," I told him.

I went to the bathroom, but didn't use it. I sat on the edge of the bathtub and thought about the impending session with the therapist in a few hours. What was I supposed to ask? What was I _not_ supposed to ask about? I knew therapists kept information confidential, so I wasn't sure how much I would be told, or if it would just be generic advice. I ran through the questions I wanted to ask while I traced the lines in the tiles of the floor with my toe.

"Are you planning to come back to bed?"

Ranger's voice startled me so much I shrieked and fell off the edge of the tub onto the floor.

"What the hell? Why didn't you knock? I could have been using the toilet," I admonished, standing up from the floor.

"I knew you weren't. I never heard the lid on the toilet lift, and I could hear you drumming your finger nails on the edge of the bathtub."

I smacked him on the arm as I tried to walk past him out of the bathroom. "OK, I get it, you know everything. I was just sitting there thinking, and hoping you'd go back to sleep."

Ranger grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him. "Anything you want to talk about?"

I shrugged. "I was just thinking about what I could ask the therapist today. I wasn't sure what was allowed to be asked and what wasn't."

Ranger watched me for a minute, assessing my mood. "I told Dr. Rodriguez yesterday that he is allowed to discuss anything about me about that you wish to know or that he feels you need to know."

I was stunned by this news, and felt good about the trust Ranger was showing in me. But I wasn't completely fooled. I knew very well that there would be things that he would never tell a living soul, regardless of whether they were bound by confidentiality.

I gave him a gentle kiss on the lips. "Thanks for trusting me."

Dr. Rodriguez was due to come to the apartment at ten in the morning. I knew they wanted me to come in for the last part of the session, but I wasn't sure what I should be doing before I was to be summoned. I dressed in jeans, a cream sweater and my sneakers. I put on mascara and lip gloss and did the best to make myself look good, but not like I'd spent a lot of time on it. I didn't want the therapist to think I was vain about my looks, or conversely that I didn't care about how I looked. Dressing for a therapist was a real bitch.

Ranger was on his laptop in the living room when I came out of the bedroom at ten minutes to ten. He was dressed in dark-wash jeans and a long-sleeved black t-shirt. He shut the laptop when he saw me come in the room.

"Where should I go while you are meeting with the therapist?" I asked. "You mentioned that I would come in at the end."

"You can do whatever you want," Ranger replied. "I doubt it'll be too long before Dr. Rodriguez wants to see you."

There was a knock on the door a couple of minutes later and Ranger stood to answer the door. Seconds later, a tall Latino man who looked to be in his late forties or early fifties followed Ranger into the living. He was dressed in jean, a dark blue cable-knit sweater and black boots. He had a wool coat draped over one arm and carried a messenger bag in the other hand. The man put his coat over the back of the chair that sat perpendicular to the couch and looked over at me.

"You must be Stephanie," he said, extending a hand and smiling. "I'm Felipe Rodriguez."

"It's nice to meet you," I said, shaking his hand. "I'll be in the bedroom until you're ready for me."

Dr. Rodriguez nodded and I headed towards the bedroom. I couldn't decide what to do to keep myself occupied in the meantime. I knew if I didn't do something, I'd be tempted to strain and hear what they were talking about, which would be bad. Ultimately, I grabbed my laptop and started looking at Pinterest while playing my music from iTunes on low.

Half an hour later, Ranger opened the bedroom door and announced that Dr. Rodriguez was ready for me. I closed my computer and put it back in my bag as I walked out the door. As I reached the living room, I heard the click of the door to the apartment. Ranger was nowhere to be found, but Dr. Rodriguez was sitting in the arm chair.

"Where did R—Carlos go?" I asked as I walked towards the couch.

"I thought it would be best to meet with you alone," Dr. Rodriguez replied. I noticed he was taking notes in a black portfolio with a pen that looked like it was engraved with his initials.

Ugh. I didn't like the idea of my own therapy session. I immediately felt myself go on guard, hoping I didn't burst into tears about how I felt my life was a bit of a mess still, despite my efforts in the growing plan.

"I'd like to start by asking how you are doing, given what Carlos has told you about his time in Somalia," Dr. Rodriguez said, getting right down to business.

I thought about it for a minute before speaking. "'I've been horrified—for him, I mean. He's so strong, and I've always thought that nothing could happen to him unless he let it. It's been strange to see him this way."

"What way is that?"

Again I had to consider how to phrase what I needed to say. "Vulnerable."

Dr. Rodriguez nodded and scribbled something on his note pad. "Tell me about what happened the first night when Carlos came home from Somalia."

"Didn't he tell you what happened?"

Dr. Rodriguez nodded. "I want your perspective."

"He had woken up from a nightmare, and I tried to get him to talk to me about it. He didn't want to, but I pushed him. When I pushed him too far, he yelled at me and threw a bottle across the room," I replied, wondering how this would change anything.

"How did you feel when he yelled at you and threw the bottle?"

I thought for a moment, letting myself remember how my blood had felt like it ran cold when he yelled at me, and I how I had started to tremble as I backed away from him.

"Scared," I finally managed. "He's never yelled at me before, nor has he ever been aggressive. It was scary."

Dr. Rodriguez watched me closely as I spoke, taking in everything I said. "Did you think Carlos would hurt you?"

"No," I replied immediately. "I didn't think he was going to hurt me, but it made me realize that there is still a side to him that I don't get to see because he keeps himself under so much control. I'm used to him rushing to my side to protect me whenever I do something stupid. While it was terrifying, it was also…sobering."

"Does it change how you feel about Carlos or your relationship?"

I shook my head. "No, I still love him and want to be with him. I just want to be able to help him, but I don't know how."

Dr. Rodriguez nodded again and jotted down more notes. I wondered whether therapists ever got whiplash from all of the nodding, and imagined they probably had excellent chiropractic coverage on their insurance.

"How is he doing?" I caught myself blurting out as Dr. Rodriguez started to open his mouth again. I hated the light being on me, so I hoped I could get him onto a different line of questioning.

"Carlos is doing better than he was when he first contacted me. During our first session a couple of weeks ago, he was mostly upset because of how he'd lost his temper with you, but also because he was coming to the realization that this wasn't something he could handle in his normal way. He still has some work to do, but given his emotional strength I feel confident that he can recover from this. I'm glad you have questions about how to help him because your help can be a tremendous aid in his recovery, both in terms of strength of recovery and time."

I nodded this time, feeling slightly relieved that the doctor was confident that he would recover. But how long would it take? Weeks? Months? Years?

"What about…sex? Normally, he can't keep his hands off of me, but since he's come back from Somalia, he's kissed me a couple of times, but that's it. Not that I'm expecting sex, but I'm curious about how to approach it with him," I asked, hoping I wasn't blushing and that I didn't come off as a sex fiend.

"In terms of your sex life, Carlos will initially be hesitant to engage in sexual intercourse because of how the rape has affected his views on his sexual self. For men especially, being raped presents as a loss of control and is psychologically emasculating. There is nothing physically wrong with Carlos that will prevent him from having sex again. It can be worse for a man when he reacts physically during the rape. Some men achieve erections and some may even ejaculate; not out of sexual pleasure, but out of a natural physical response to stimulation that cannot be controlled. This often makes them question their sexuality, worrying about if they are gay or bisexual. I know Carlos does not question his sexual orientation, but the loss of control over what happened to him and the flashbacks he has been having are what will stand in the way of your sex life. My recommendation is that you let him lead the way; let him initiate contact for a while. If you sense that he wants to do more, but is hesitant, you can encourage but don't push him. If he's not ready, let it drop. Basically, help him to understand that you still find him attractive and want to be intimate with him again in order to help him realize that he is still as much of a man as he was before the assault," Dr. Rodriguez finished.

I understood what Dr. Rodriguez was saying, but I knew it wouldn't be easy to do. I thought back to when I was in elementary school and would try to stand in the middle of the seesaw, wobbling back and forth, trying to keep it straight. I would feel a rush of panic anytime I started to tip to one side, frantically trying to correct it and leaning to the other side. I predicted I would feel the same way about trying to manage my relationship with Ranger for the time being.

"What about the nightmares? How should I handle those? He had one last night, but I pretended to be asleep because I remembered how badly things had gone the last time. He knew I was awake, but he didn't try to wake me. I don't want to seem insensitive, but don't want to push him either."

"You can wake up when he does, help him to remember that he's safe and ask if he needs anything. After that, follow his lead in terms of helping him, unless of course you fear he is going to be in danger or may put someone else in danger."

I nodded again. He had basically told me the same things I'd read online, but tailored them to Ranger, which was reassuring.

"Did you have any other questions? Our time is almost up," Dr. Rodriguez asked as he finished another notation.

I shook my head. "No, you've covered the big questions I've had. Thank you for your help. I just hope I don't screw him up."

Dr. Rodriguez chuckled. "Stephanie, I can tell you love him, and he loves you, and you will definitely be a positive and strengthening part of his life. Don't forget that."

As if on cue, Ranger walked back into the apartment. His expression was neutral as usual, but I suspected he was curious to know what he had discussed, though unlike me, he wouldn't be so obvious about it.

Dr. Rodriguez and I both stood up. "Stephanie, it's been nice to meet you. Please call me if you have questions or need to talk," he said, handing me a business card.

I accepted the card and nodded. Dr. Rodriguez walked to the door and Ranger showed him out. I heard them agree to determine their meeting location on Friday based on the weather and then the therapist left. Ranger reappeared in the living room a second later.

"How did it go?" he asked, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms across his chest.

I pocketed the business card and sat back down on the couch. "Good. He helped me to understand how I can support you right now."

Ranger watched me for a moment. "Anything else?"

I shrugged. "Not really. He basically told me things you had already told me, about how you were upset that you'd yelled at me and it made you realize you needed help. He thinks you'll recover from this, but that you just need time and love."

For some reason, Ranger looked like he might be annoyed, though I wasn't sure if the annoyance was at me, his therapist or the situation. He came over and sat down on the couch next to me. He held my hand in his and blew out a sigh as he laid his head against the back of the couch. I got the feeling I was missing something, but had no clue as to what.

"He was supposed to tell you more about the attack," Ranger finally said, staring at the opposite wall. "Things I didn't want to tell you in person."

I squeezed his hand. "You don't have to tell me unless you want to. Even so, it wouldn't change anything. I'll still be here."

Ranger looked over at me, gauging whether I was being honest. I held his gaze, wanting him to know I was serious. He finally nodded and looked away.

"When I was being…raped," Ranger began, saying the word as though it were foreign to him. "They not only used the night stick, but they…purposely touched…me. I got an erection from it, but I didn't like it. It was just from being weak and the stimulation, but it bothers me that it happened."

I had suspected as much when Dr. Rodriguez talked about Ranger's feelings on the matter, but it didn't make any difference to me. I'd heard of women who had orgasmed while being raped—not out of liking it, but because the rapist had managed to hit the right spot. I didn't think it was any different in this case.

"Like I said, it doesn't matter. I'll be here, and I'll do whatever it is you need me to do to help you get through this."

Ranger put an arm around me and pulled me into his chest, kissing the top of my head.

"I don't deserve you, Stephanie Plum."


	16. How Deep Is Your Love?

_A/N: I'm so sorry for the delay. Research Methods is a real bitch. As a birthday present to myself, I made myself sit down and write. It's so cathartic. Enjoy this chapter and the next one is already in progress. _

I left Newark early on Friday morning, once the roads were clear and I could make it back to Trenton without ending up in a ditch. Ranger had his appointment with Dr. Rodriguez at his office that morning and would be leaving directly to return home. He told me he would need to go to the office and wasn't sure if he'd be over for a day or so. He had been a little more relaxed after my session with his therapist, but still a bit hesitant and quieter than usual.

I spent the rest of my day unpacking my overnight bag, doing laundry and cleaning the house. I told myself it was just because it was needed, but when I found myself furiously scrubbing the little ledge on top of my bedroom door, I accepted that it was because I was trying to distract myself. I'd never been involved in anything so serious with a boyfriend before, so I really had no idea how to handle it, other than what I had been reading and heard from the therapist. But I knew I could put up a front and keep the others from knowing the truth. I'd lied and pretended lots of really bad situations weren't big deals in the past. This was just one more.

Feeling a fatigue that had nothing to do with the housework I'd been doing for several hours that day, I was in bed by nine that night. I closed my eyes and fell into an uneasy sleep, wondering if Ranger was getting any sleep and whether I should have called him today. I knew he would be busy trying to get back into his work and probably wouldn't want interruption, but started to worry about how my silence may have made him feel. I woke up and checked the clock at one point, which told me it was a little after two in the morning. Definitely not the time to call and wake him up to ask if he was doing alright. Resigned to wait until morning, I had just closed my eyes when I heard a noise downstairs. It sounded like someone opening my door and walking slowly across my kitchen. I realized that I'd forgotten to set the alarm, so I grabbed my gun from my bedside table and tiptoed across the floor, hiding in the little space of wall between the stairs and the bathroom. I peered around the edge of the stairs, but couldn't see anything. I was just about to go back to my room, thinking that I'd imagined it all when I heard slow footsteps on the stairs. I froze, trying not to hyperventilate and took a step back so that I could have my gun raised once the person got to the top of the stairs. Cold panic was running through me and the gun in my hands shook as I held it.

"Stop right there," I said, my voice quavering as the dark shadow reached the top of the stairs. "Let me see your hands."

"Steph, it's me," came Ranger's voice from the shadow. I blew out a sigh and lowered my gun, trying not to pass out with relief.

"God, you scared the hell out of me. I thought you were a burglar," I said, leaning against the wall.

"You didn't have your alarm set, so I could have been," he replied, walking past me into the bedroom.

"I didn't figure you were coming over," I told him, following him into the bedroom. He turned on the small lamp of the bed table and I blinked furiously, allowing my eyes to adjust to the light. Ranger was dressed in black sweats, sneakers and a Rangeman hooded sweatshirt, and he had placed a duffle bag on the bed. He pulled out the clothes and toiletries that he had taken when he left my house the night after his return, putting the clothes back in the closet and the toiletries in the bathroom before answering.

"I wasn't planning to come over, but I couldn't sleep. I thought I may sleep better with you next to me."

My heart fluttered a little bit at the admission, but I was sobered when I recalled why he needed me. I walked over and hugged him, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head against his chest. He put his arms around me and we were silent for a minute, listening to the quiet around us. I pulled away after a minute and climbed in bed, putting my gun back in the bedside table.

"I'm glad you've finally learned to keep your gun nearby and were ready to use it," Ranger said as he pulled off his sweatshirt and kicked off his sneakers.

I shrugged. "I must have learned my lesson after ending up unprotected so many times."

A lesson I should have learned after my first time getting kidnapped or having my apartment broken into, but I've never claimed to be a genius.

Ranger climbed in bed next to me and turned out the light. "I thought it was in case I acted like a total shit again and you needed to shoot me."

"That too," I replied.

I woke up the next morning to the sun streaming in through my window. A quick peek at the clock told me it was eight-thirty-two. Ranger was still asleep with an arm thrown over me, keeping me pulled close to him. I tried to get out of his hold without waking him, but was unsuccessful.

"I'll be right back," I whispered when he opened his eyes. He nodded and went back to sleep as I padded into the bathroom. I took a quick shower and returned to the bedroom ten minutes later with a towel wrapped around me. Ranger didn't look like he'd moved from where I'd left him, so I was more confident that I wouldn't wake him up if I were quiet.

I sat down in the chair in the corner of my bedroom and started applying lotion to my legs and arms, debating about what to do. The bonds office was normally open until noon, but I wasn't sure I wanted to go in. I had texted with Connie on Thursday, who said there hadn't been any new FTAs during the snowstorm, as the courts had been shut down and all hearings had been rescheduled.

Maybe I just won't go in until Monday, I thought as I opened up my towel to apply lotion to my chest and abdomen. It's been an emotional few weeks and things tend to slow down around Christmas anyway. It'll almost be a vacation.

"Babe."

I had just applied lotion to my breasts when Ranger's voice had startled me out of my thoughts.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," I told him, closing my lotion bottle and standing up to wrap my towel back around my body.

There was a hint of a smile on his lips. "Never apologize for feeling yourself up. It was pretty sexy."

I shook my head in mock disgust and grabbed clothes from the dresser and closet. I sat on the edge of the bed next to him as I started to get dressed, feeling his eyes on me. I looked over at my shoulder once to find his eyes were dilated and he was eyeing my body with interest. When he noticed me watching him, I gave him a small smile that I hoped conveyed the right message, which was a mixture of "I love you," "I'm a little shy because you're checking me out" and "I wouldn't mind if you did more than just look". He didn't say anything, but ran his index finger down my spine, giving me chills that had nothing to do with the cold winter air. When I finished getting dressed, I stood and Ranger climbed out of bed after me.

"I'm going to make some breakfast. What would you like?'' I asked, doing a full body scan as he stretched. My eyes lingered for a moment over the bulge in his pants, which had me wondering if it was just a normal morning stiffy or a reaction to seeing me naked.

"Anything that won't clog my arteries," he replied, kissing my cheek and heading out of the room to the bathroom. I grabbed my cell phone as I left the room, seeing a text from Connie that said the office was closed for the day and she was working from home. Works for me.

It was only when I went downstairs and checked out my refrigerator that I remembered I hadn't gone to the store before I left town. I had some eggs, moldy strawberries, out-dated milk, bread and condiments. I ended up making scrambled eggs and toast and had just set our places at the breakfast bar when Ranger came downstairs, showered and dressed.

"This was all I had," I informed him as I sat down. "I need to go to the store."

His lips twitched as he sat down next to me. "Some things never change."

I rolled my eyes as I took a bite of egg. "Do you have a lot to do at the office today?"

Ranger nodded. "I've been gone for almost a month. Tank is able to pick up most of the slack when I'm gone, but as the sole-owner now there are some things that only I can do. Do you have many FTAs right now?"

I shook my head. "I'd gotten my files cleared before I came up to Newark and Connie told me the courts have been closed because of the snow storm, so no one is FTA at the moment. She said they aren't opening the office today, but will bond people out if they call."

"Do you need money?"

I shook my head. "I had quite a few captures while you were gone, so I'll be ok for a couple of weeks. Not having rent or a mortgage really helps my money go further."

We finished our meals in silence. My mind was consumed with thoughts of what it would be like to live with Ranger. I'd been debating about asking him to move in with me since before he was kidnapped in November, but other circumstances had pushed it from my mind. I wasn't sure if he would be open to it, since he had his apartment at Rangeman, which included Ella and her amazing cooking. The refrigerator was never empty at Rangeman and his apartment was always in immaculate condition. He was also just seconds away from work in an emergency, where my house was a ten-minute drive from Rangeman. This wasn't even counting his lone wolf lifestyle. I was hoping that had changed somewhat, since he had been in a relationship with me for almost six months. I wanted to ask him, but worried how a 'no' response may affect our relationship. I didn't think we'd break up or anything, but I wondered if it would cause awkwardness between us.

"I'm not a horrible cook and my house stays fairly clean," I inadvertently said out loud.

Ranger had been up rinsing his dishes and putting them in the dishwasher when I made this proclamation. He turned around and looked at me.

"I've not eaten much of your cooking, but so far you've not poisoned me. And yes, your house is clean," Ranger replied, looking confused.

I stood up and walked over to the sink. "Sorry, I was thinking to myself."

"Worried that you're not making progress in your plan?"

I shook my head. "No, I've been making good progress considering what a train wreck I've been the past few years. I was just thinking about something else."

Ranger looked at me expectantly while I put away my dishes. "What's bothering you?"

I sighed once I realized he wasn't going to let this go. Standing at the kitchen sink wasn't exactly how I'd be thinking of asking him this question.

"Before you went to Somalia, I'd been thinking of asking you to move in with me. Since then I've had other things to occupy my mind, but now I've come back to that question. " I informed him. "I wasn't sure if you'd want to leave your apartment and Ella's cooking and housekeeping. I don't eat very healthy and I never exercise. My sheets aren't silky and perfect like yours and my house isn't designed by an interior decorator. I usually forget to go to the grocery until my fridge is empty. And I know it's so close to work that if you have an emergency or have to work a shift unexpectedly that you just have to go downstairs, but my house is only ten minutes from your office, and —and I'm babbling."

Ranger leaned against my counter and crossed his arms. "So my choices are living in a sterile, empty apartment that's maintained by my housekeeper, or moving into a home that has the woman I love living in it? Do you honestly think this is going to be a difficult decision?"

My stomach did a small flip. "I really wasn't sure. Ella is amazing."

Ranger's lips tipped up into a small smile. "She does a great job, but Ella and that apartment are never going to win out over you, Babe."

"So, you'll move in with me?"

Ranger pushed away from the counter and pulled me into his arms. "Yes."

He brought his mouth down on mine with one hand at my neck and one on my lower back, kissing me with an intensity that he hadn't showed since before Somalia. He pulled away from me and kissed me on the forehead.

"I have to go, but I'll have Ella start packing the rest of my personal belongings and I'll bring them with me tonight," he said, picking up his keys from the hook and walking out the back door to his car.

I stood rooted to the spot after he left, trying to process what had happened. I had asked Ranger to move in with me and he had agreed. Was I ready for this?

_Too freaking late for that, Steph. You already asked him. _

To distract myself from any anxiety over cohabitating with Ranger, I went upstairs and started clearing out my closet. Now that I'd be sharing it with someone, I couldn't keep every article of clothing I owned in there at one time. I started sorting out my spring and summer clothes and piling them on my bed. Every storage tote I owned was full, so I pulled out my largest suitcase and started folding my clothes and putting them inside. Once I was done, there was about half of the closet left for Ranger.

My dresser proved to be more difficult to condense, as it was stuff I needed year-round. Ultimately, I got rid of some old t-shirts, which had included anything that had belonged to Morelli or that were old and holey and something I'd never wear in front of Ranger. I managed to get two out of the five drawers emptied for him, which I thought was fair. Men don't have as much stuff as women.

I was just about to stop for lunch when the doorbell rang. I ran downstairs to find a Rangeman employee at my door. I had seen him around the office before and knew he did computer stuff, but never knew his name.

"Hello, ma'am. I'm John. Ranger sent me to set up his computer and to make your internet connection secure," he informed me.

Ranger certainly hadn't wasted any time.

I stood aside and let him in, showing him the office upstairs.

"What's the password for your modem and for your wi-fi?" John asked, pen poised over a clipboard.

I stared at him for a moment. "They have passwords?"

John's expression told me only fear of his boss had kept him from heaving a huge sigh and rolling his eyes. "Well, ma'am, you may not have them password protected if you don't remember putting one in. I'll give you the passwords when I'm done."

I nodded and left him to his work, having little doubt that once I was away he would be shaking his head at my technological incompetence.

I went downstairs and started making a grocery list so that Ranger and I could actually have dinner that night. John had gone out to his car twice to retrieve stuff and headed back upstairs. After an hour, he came down to tell me that everything was set up and left me the passwords for both the internet modem and the wi-fi, telling me I would have to use the password to access the internet the next time I logged onto my laptop. Steeling myself, I ran upstairs to look at my guest-room-turned-office to see if it had been morphed into a command center capable of launching a missile. I was relieved, though almost disappointed to find that only a top-of-the-line desktop computer and a printer with built-in scanner had been added to the room, though I suspected my internet connection was now more secure than the Pentagon's.

I left the house and stopped by my parents' to see everyone. I hadn't told them that I had spent the last few days up in Newark, but with the snowstorm, I wouldn't have been able to get around much anyway.

"We haven't seen you for a few days," Grandma Mazur said when I arrived. "Did you have enough food to last you until the snow was cleared?"

I nodded. "Yep, I ate plenty, though now I need to go to the store. I just thought I'd stop by for a minute."

My mom came out of the kitchen and into the dining room where Grandma and I were sitting. "Is Carlos back to town yet?" she asked as she started folding towels that had just come out of the dryer.

"Yes, he got back into town yesterday. He's been busy trying to get caught up at his office, since he's been gone almost a month."

"Did he tell you what he was doing?" Grandma asked, helping my mom with the folding.

I shook my head. "The work he does for the government is confidential. I know not to ask because he can't tell me."

"Ooo, I bet he's an assassin. Like James Bond or something," Grandma said.

I snorted while my mom turned white. "I don't think he's an assassin, Grandma."

"I should hope not," my mom said. "I don't want my potential future son-in-law to be killing people."

I left that comment well alone.

"I don't know about the future son-in-law part per se, Mom, but he is moving in with me," I informed her.

Grandma's eyes lit up. "That's wonderful. Think of all the hot sex you'll get to have whenever you want."

There was a stunned silence for a minute before my mom made the sign of the cross and my dad turned up the television to an almost deafening volume.

"Well, this has been fun," I said standing up. "But I need to get to the store. See you later."

I hurried out of the house, avoiding my dad's eye and climbed into the Cayenne. If Ranger can survive my family, I decided as I pulled away from the curb, then our relationship should be pretty solid.

The grocery store was packed full of people who had been trapped in their homes the last few days, so it took me nearly two hours to get everything I needed and to pay for my purchases, time which had included wrestling a gallon of milk away from a woman who had tried to grab it seconds after I had my hand on it. When I arrived home, a Rangeman SUV was parked in front of the house again. I parked in the garage and started unloading groceries. I had managed to get all of the groceries in one trip, nearly breaking my arms in the process. I was starting to unload the bags when Ranger came in the kitchen.

"Ella had some of my stuff packed, so I brought it over. She'll have the rest finished by the time I leave this evening," he told me.

"What time do you think you'll be home? I can have dinner ready."

Something akin to amused affection glinted in Ranger's eyes. "I'll be home by seven at the latest, Mrs. Cleaver."

I threw a packet of shredded cheese at him as he walked away, making him laugh.

By six-thirty, I had salad made and waiting in the fridge and a lasagna in the oven. So the lasagna was frozen, but Ranger didn't need to know that. I had transferred it from the cardboard carton and into a glass baking dish that I'd bought at the store before I put it in the oven. I had made the salad by myself, so I didn't feel like a total fraud. I was cutting a load of French bread when the back door opened and Ranger came in, carrying two suitcases, which I presumed contained clothes. I had peeked in the boxes Ella had packed earlier and found that she had sent over just about everything from his apartment except clothes. I had been itching to take out the sheets and put them on my bed —our bed, I mentally corrected myself —, but I didn't want to look presumptuous. He carried the suitcases past me and up the stairs. When he came back down, he had taken off his coat and the utility belt he always wore when on the job.

Ranger came and wrapped his arms around my waist and kissing me on the neck. "I feel like I'm supposed to say 'Honey, I'm home' or something," he said.

I chuckled. "Have you ever lived with anyone before?"

Ranger shook his head. "No, this is new territory for me. I was still in the Army when Rachel and I were married, so I was gone almost the entire time except when I came back when Julie was born."

I nodded. I hadn't moved in with Dickie until after we were married and had moved back out nine months later when I found him with Joyce in the dining room. Morelli and I had tried living together a couple of times, but it had only lasted less than a year in total.

"My cohabitating experiences haven't been that great, but I think you and I will fare better. The few times we've stayed together temporarily have gone well. You're pretty easy to live with," I told him as I took the bread to the table.

Ranger went over to one of the cabinets and pulled out a bottle of wine and grabbed the corkscrew out of a drawer. "I'll try to keep it that way."

We ate a quiet, but comfortable dinner. Ranger commented on whether Marie Calendar or Stouffer's was to thank for the delicious dinner. My look of guilty shock had earned me a full-on smile and I reciprocated with a stiff-middle finger.

After we put our dishes away, I went upstairs to help him unpack his possessions. I opened up the box with the sheets first and moaned slightly as I hugged a set to my chest, rubbing my cheek against the orgasmic material.

"I love these sheets," I said. "We are definitely putting a set on the bed tonight."

Ranger was in the middle of unpacking office supplies and putting them in the desk that we now shared. "They're just sheets, babe. What happens between them is much better."

"Yes, I do seem to vaguely recollect these fun activities that happen between sheets, and on sofas and in Turbos."

I had put myself in a standing-in-the-middle-of-the-seesaw moment with that comment. I had followed his therapist's advice of making him aware that I still wanted him while not pushing him before he might be ready. Ranger had watched me closely after that comment, and I held his gaze for a moment before standing up and taking the box of sheets with me. I put all but one set in the linen closet, which I then proceeded to put on the bed. I really missed sex—not just the orgasms and excitement of it, but because of the intimacy it gave me with Ranger. Morelli had been a dirty, hot, wild sex style that was fun, but got old after a while when you wanted slow and tender lovemaking. Ranger had somehow managed to combine the tenderness of lovemaking with the lust and intensity of wild gorilla sex, which made it spectacular. It also was the time when I would see Ranger at his most vulnerable. When he was in the middle of sex, he couldn't maintain his neutrality and zen-calm. The ecstasy of it all was clear on his face and in his voice. We hadn't had that in over a month and it was starting to wear on me, especially when we'd been going through such an emotional time.

We spent another two hours unpacking and putting things away before everything was done. We hadn't spoken any more, but I knew he must be thinking about the comment I made. My emotions had kept vacillating between having done the right thing to worrying that he might be upset with me. I was in another worrying stage when he came into the bedroom as I was getting dressed for bed. He came up to me and stood in front of me, though he didn't touch me.

"Are you sure you want this?" Ranger asked quietly.

I nodded and took a step closer to him, running my hands up his chest to his shoulders. Bending down, Ranger kissed me softly, putting his hands on my bare waist. The kiss became more intense and within a couple of minutes, we were both naked and ready for action. He slid into me and steadied himself for a minute, closing his eyes and kissing along my neck. I felt nervous, almost like a virgin, as I waited for him to move inside me. I was worried about how this first encounter was going to go and how he was going to feel during it. My body was aching for him, but I worried my mind might interfere with my enjoyment. After what felt like an eternity, Ranger started thrusting into me, his eyes opening and focusing deeply into mine. I had never had such an awkward sexual encounter with Ranger before and for the first time, I was wishing for it to hurry up and be over with. I could see fear and pain in his eyes as he moved, which only drove me further from completion. I could tell he was trying, but Ranger was nowhere near his normal game and we both knew it. I knew he wasn't going to stop until I finished, so I started acting like I was close, moaning and tightening around him. Ranger stopped and rolled off of me to lie next to me and stared at the ceiling.

"You didn't finish," I told him, noticing his full erection.

"Neither did you," he said, not looking at me. "Don't try to fake it with me, Stephanie. It's insulting."

"I'm sorry," I told him, rolling over to face him. "Why didn't you just say something? I didn't want you to think that I didn't want you, but I could tell from the look in your eyes that this was really hard for you."

Ranger continued to stare at the ceiling for a few minutes, not answering me or giving any indication that he heard me. I was just about to get out of bed and get dressed when he finally spoke.

"I want to be more normal again, but it's difficult. I've worried about how you would feel about me, even though I know you've told me you still want me. The nightmares about what happened to me aren't as bad anymore, but now I've started worrying about you getting raped. I've been going back to that day that Joe York had you and what might have happened had I not known where you were going and been on my way to help you. I told myself tonight that I was ready, and I was to an extent. I really want to be with you. After everything I've been through and how much you've supported me, I know that I love you more than ever. And this will fix itself, but I think I need more time. And maybe to take it more slowly."

I felt tears slip out of my eyes despite my effort not to cry. The pain in his voice, no matter hard he tried to hide it, was evident. I put my hand on his cheek and urged him to look at me. When he finally acquiesced, I leaned over and gave him a soft kiss.

"I will do whatever it is you need me to do," I said. "We're in this together."


	17. Viva la Vida

Chapter 17

_A/N: I've finally figured out how I'm going to work Ranger's POV into the story without spoiling future chapters or becoming too repetitive. Have a peek inside Ranger's head with this chapter. _

The pounding of my feet on the treadmill and the whirl of the belt were the only sounds in the room as I tried to focus my mind on productive thoughts and push aside the painful questions that had been running through my brain earlier. It was just after one in the morning, and as expected I was the only one in the Rangeman gym. Stephanie had finally gone to sleep and I had left quietly, knowing that my anxiety would only intensify by lying awake in the dark.

I'd refused any medications to treat my anxiety, as the pills would only dull the emotion when the real treatment is to confront problem head on, adapt and move on. I knew I'd made progress since that first night when I came back and snapped, but there was still plenty of room for improvement.

I could have never imagine this five years ago—me, Carlos Manoso, in a committed relationship. I had long ago told myself that no woman should ever be sullied with me as her partner. I'd had short-term relationships, but they were emotionally one-sided and had simply fulfilled a physical need in me. I'd been so determined to keep everyone at arm's length that I even let another man become father to my daughter, telling myself her life was better without me.

But then I had to meet what surely was the most pathetic creature to enter bond enforcement. I had never worked with someone so green, so it was refreshing, albeit aggravating at times to mentor Stephanie Plum. Her hatred of guns, her belief in the good in people and tendency to plaster her emotions all over her face had promised to be a deadly combination for her. And her drive, stubbornness, compassion and body proved to be a deadly combination for me.

I had become immensely attracted to her, finding myself thinking more often than I should have about the night when I'd had to rescue her while she stood handcuffed and naked in her bathroom. I had told myself it was just lust —I would eventually get her in bed and get it out of my system, able to refocus my thoughts and emotions where they should be. I had gotten her in bed and slaked my lust, but instead of leaving my system, the feelings I had for her showed their true nature: I had fallen in love for the first time in my adult life. I'd sent her back to Morelli, telling myself I could just keep her as a friend, ignoring the affection I felt. But as I held my gun to Eddie Abruzzi's head while he wrote his suicide note under the threat that I'd kill his family, I knew I was going to love Stephanie Plum until I took my last breath. It was the first and only time I had ever killed anyone that wasn't on an order from the Army, proving to myself that I would do anything to keep her safe.

My fear for her life in dangerous situations has only ever been trumped by the fear I felt when Tank informed me that Morelli was going to Camden to work for the state police. I had immediately called my lawyers to say that they needed to expedite the ownership transfers on the Rangeman offices so that I could return to Trenton, as anything else could be faxed or emailed to me. It had taken five agonizing days, but I finally managed to get everything settled so that I could leave. My first stop had been to her apartment. I didn't know where she was, and had refrained from calling the control room to see where her GPS placed her. Everyone in that building knew I was going to want to know if Stephanie was staying in Trenton, but I didn't have to confirm anything by acting like a desperate, lovesick fool. I'd been relieved when she told me that she and Morelli were permanently over, and curious when she had mentioned Kinsey's wedding rehearsal. I had felt an emotion run through me that I had never known before as I had watched her walk down that aisle towards me. I had never wanted to get married again, telling myself it was better that way. When I had fallen in love with Stephanie, I had told myself that I would never get too seriously involved with her romantically because she would eventually want what I wouldn't give her. But in the thirty seconds it had taken her to walk from the back of the church to the altar, I had allowed myself to suspend reality momentarily to pretend it was her marrying me, and in that moment, I knew that I was a changed man. She had thankfully interrupted my thoughts when she nearly crashed into the bridesmaid in front of her. Hearing her say she'd been going through something similar had given me the nerve to tell her that if she really wanted me, past and all, she could have me. I'd left her apartment scared shitless by what I had just done, but knew that I had meant it.

My trip to Bolivia had been difficult, as I'd had to work harder than ever to put Stephanie out of my mind and stay focused on my job. When I'd landed back in Newark and checked my messages, I had never expected to hear her voice telling me that she loved me and wanted to be with me. I had repeated her message five times while I waited for my luggage, the words washing over me like a baptism, cleansing my heart and giving me a new chance. Making love to her that night had also felt like a new experience. I had fully invested my emotions into her, and she had been more at peace and consumed as well since she no longer had the guilt of Morelli weighing on her.

The day Kinsey had called me to tell me that Amanda was pregnant, I had congratulated him and told him that we must be getting soft in our old ages, considering I was finally settling into a committed relationship with Stephanie. Kinsey had laughed, saying it had been obvious from the first time he saw us together that I would walk through fire for her, and that Amanda and Stephanie must be the most amazing women on the planet if they could elicit such feelings from the two of us. I couldn't have imagined that I'd be speaking at Kinsey's funeral only a week later, looking out at those women who had brought two of the most emotionally-cutoff men in the world to their knees. I had taken Stephanie home and into bed, not sure of what my intentions were. I had very seriously considered leaving her as we had driven back to the house; her knowledge that I had killed Abruzzi had shaken me to my core. I had nearly come unglued while we had sex, and when I hurried out of her bedroom and she stopped me at the top of the stairs, I had thought it may very well be the last time I saw her. Tank was one of the only people outside of my family who could have seen the shift in me and knew where my brain had been. He had sent me to the gym to work off my feelings when I had nearly fired Lester for spilling coffee in one of the vehicles. I had beat the bag until I was sure I'd fractured one of my knuckles, but it had made me realize that I was mourning a friend and that I couldn't let go of the best thing to ever happen to me over the fear of the unknown.

Every member of my immediate family had approached me at some point during the weekend of my parents' anniversary to threaten me with some form of bodily harm if I didn't end up marrying Stephanie. They had all seen the change in me, and overwhelmingly approved of it. My mother had told me that when she and my dad had sent me to live with Grandma Bella, they had feared that I would be dead before I turned thirty. Even when I had managed to survive my twenties and start a successful business, she had told my father that while I may have physically survived, she feared my soul had not come with me, leaving me just a shell of a man. She had gone on to say that seeing me with Stephanie had shown her she was wrong, and that she would be able to die in peace one day knowing that I had been able to love someone as much as she and my father had loved each other.

I stopped the treadmill as my mind wandered into the dark corners where I kept the memories of what had happened in Somalia. My thoughts had been consumed with Stephanie, first with telling myself that I would get out of there and back to her somehow. As time had gone on and the torture grew worse, I had started to worry about what may happen if I never came back. I had fought the images of her marrying Morelli in my head until the day the torture took a new and more psychologically destructive turn. I had convinced myself that Stephanie was better off without me when I had been released, escorted by Navy Seals from the compound where I had been kept for what felt like an eternity to a waiting helicopter. I had managed to keep the sexual assault off the record when I was being debriefed, telling myself that if I compartmentalized the whole thing, I could get through it without ever having to tell a soul. The sound of my own yelling, the breaking of a beer bottle as it smashed against the wall and the look of pure terror on Stephanie's face after being home for one day had told me otherwise. I had fled without a word to her, terrified that I had ruined everything, but hoping that if I could get the help I so obviously needed, I could repair the damage to my mind and our relationship. Words could not express how I felt the night I found that Stephanie had driven five hours in a snow storm to tell me she loved me and to try to apologize for pushing me. I had gone down to her car to get her stuff just to give myself time to pull it together, as I had nearly broken down in front of her.

I had been absolutely sick when I told her about what happened in Somalia, terrified that she would recoil with disgust and leave, not wanting to touch a man who hadn't been able to fight off his attackers. Instead she had loved me and supported me, doing what she could to find out how to help me overcome the feelings of guilt and shame. I had lied to her about what time my appointment was with Dr. Rodriguez, telling her to get started back to Trenton while I went to his office. I had finished my appointment with Rodriguez early in the day before going on to another appointment that I had never thought I would make, even after Stephanie and I had started seeing one another exclusively. It had been a surreal experience, and it still amazed me a day later that I had even done it. But I knew it wasn't a mistake, and that I would be a better man someday because of it.

I went back to my new home and crawled back into bed with the woman I loved, hoping against hope that I could spend the rest of my life showing her just how much she meant to me.

I woke up the next morning wondering if Stephanie would be feeling awkward about what had happened the night before. Her side of the bed was empty and I could smell coffee wafting upstairs. I showered and dressed for work before heading downstairs. When I walked into the kitchen, I found Stephanie sitting on one of the stools at the breakfast bar, Rex's hamster cage in front of her. She wasn't moving to feed him or to clean the cage, but was simply staring at the cage. I walked up behind her to see what she was staring at.

"What's going on?"

Stephanie let out a sniffle and a tear fell down her cheek. "I think Rex is dead."

Not what I had been expecting to hear. "Are you sure he isn't just sleeping?"

"I've been trying to tell myself to just open the cage and pick him up to find out, but I can't bring myself to do it. It would make it real."

I had never understood her affection for a rodent, but knew he had been important to her. He had provided her with an outlet for the maternal instincts that she didn't think she had or that weren't ready to be channeled into offspring. He had also been another body, albeit a small one, in her home whenever she and Morelli were on the outs. She told me once she had bought him after she had separated from her ex-husband so that she wouldn't feel so lonely. Was it just a coincidence that he died the day after I move in with her, or an indicator of her own emotional state?

I nearly smacked myself in the forehead. Too much time in therapy was making me think like Rodriguez.

I opened the hamster cage and put my hand into the soup can where the hamster normally slept, pulling out the still body. I held him flat in the palm of my hand, noting his closed eyes and lack of breathing. More tears fell down Stephanie's cheeks as she stroked him with one finger and told him she loved him. After a moment, she got up and found a box of hamster nuggets, emptying the box into the trash and bringing it over for me to the put the hamster inside.

"I would bury him in the backyard, but the ground's frozen and there's too much snow," she said, not meeting my eyes. "I can't—could you?"

She couldn't bring herself to throw him in the garbage was the unspoken statement, requesting that I do it for her. I put the box down on the counter and pulled her into a hug, kissing the top of her head. This weekend was not proving to be one of our happiest on record. If it kept going at this rate, we'd probably be eating bullets for breakfast on Monday.

"Go take a shower and get dressed," I told her. "I'll take care of Rex."

When she went upstairs, I put on my coat and walked outside, intending to toss the box into the large garbage tote in the alley. I stood there for a second, willing myself to lift the lid and toss the box inside, but could only think about the pain on Stephanie's face when she realized she couldn't bury her beloved pet.

"Goddamnit," I said as I ran back inside to get my car keys. I unlocked my car and got inside, tossing the box on the passenger seat and backing out of the driveway. Fifteen minutes later, I got out of the car, bringing with me a cheap plastic flower pot and the smallest bag of potting soil the home improvement store had sold. I set the pot on the back porch, put the box in the bottom and filled it with some of the soil. I put the bag of remaining soil in the garage and headed back inside to find Stephanie coming downstairs, freshly showered and dressed in jeans and a blue long-sleeved Rangers t-shirt.

She saw me standing in my coat and sadness shown on her face. I crooked a finger at her in a 'come here' motion and she walked over to me. I pulled her to the back door and opened it up to allow her to see the pot.

"Rex's temporary resting place. You can transfer him to the yard once it warms up," I indicated.

A look of shock registered on her face, followed moments later by relief. She looked up at me, her blue eyes swimming with tears once again. "Thank you," she whispered as she hugged me.

I patted her on the back. "Don't mention it. I mean that —_don't_ mention it to anyone that I just did this. I'll deny it until the day you have to bury me in the backyard."

That had earned me a laugh from Stephanie and a small punch to the chest. "I guess I should be grateful that he lived this long. Hamsters aren't supposed to live nine years," she said as we shut the back door. "I can't believe he died the day after you move in with me."

"My overwhelming masculinity was too much for him," I muttered as I poured myself a cup of coffee. I could practically hear Stephanie roll her eyes at me, but she didn't comment further. Ten minutes later, we were both headed out the door. I was going into the office for a few hours and she was going on a donut run to help her pain. If there were ever times when I couldn't find Stephanie, one of my first stops was always Tasty Pastry.

I spent the day reviewing the last of the police records from a couple of break-ins that happened while I was in Newark. I was about to move on to the new accounts that were due to be installed on Monday when my cell phone rang. Caller ID told me it was my mother.

"Hola," I said as I connected to the call.

"Hi dear. When did you get home?" she asked pleasantly.

I hesitated momentarily. I could easily lie to terrorists despite their most painful torture techniques, but even I had a hard time lying to my own mother. She also had the uncanny sense of knowing when I tried to do it, no matter how convincing I was to anyone else.

"I got back to Jersey right after Thanksgiving, but had to take some time away," I told her, preparing for her probing questions.

There was silence on the other end of the phone. "Something bad happened to you while you were away, right? I could tell something was off when Pierre called to say your trip had been extended."

If mothers ran the world, there would be no wars or genocide. Spies would be thwarted at every attempt to steal information from a foreign government. Everyone would get begrudgingly get along, petty skirmishes would be quashed with a look and we'd all eat our vegetables. I've always had a soft spot for strong-willed women, likely because of growing up in a household full of them.

"Yes, but I don't want to talk about it right now."

My mother knew me well enough to not push me on it at the moment, but I knew I couldn't keep things from her for long. Confidentiality meant nothing to my mother.

"Okay, well the reason I called was because I wanted to see what you and Stephanie had planned for Christmas. I'd love for you two to come up for dinner since you missed Thanksgiving, but didn't know if you had plans with her family that would interfere with our normal routine."

I'd nearly forgotten Christmas was so close. I'd been so wrapped up in my own shit that I had neglected holiday responsibilities, including sending my siblings money to buy their children a gift from me, as there were too many of them to go shopping for these days. I also had to get Julie's gift purchased and mailed to Miami, and this was the first Christmas I was with Stephanie, so I knew I should get her something. I resisted the urge to beat my head against the desk.

"I'm not sure. I've been so busy I forgot about Christmas. I'll call Steph and get back to you later today," I told her. I disconnected and immediately called Stephanie. My mother wasn't very patient and would be calling me back in short order with the expectation that I had talked to Stephanie.

"What do you typically do with your family for Christmas?" I asked Stephanie when she answered my call.

"We go to Mass that morning and then my mom and grandma spend the rest of the morning and early afternoon fixing everything while simultaneously telling me that I should be helping them while shooting me down whenever I offer to help with anything. We eat in our normal fashion, drink more wine than usual and then sit around opening gifts and watching football. Now that Valerie is back with the kids, we drink even more wine to help us cope with the screaming and noisy toys. I eventually make it back home Christmas night drunk and laden with leftovers."

I snorted. "My mother wants us to come up to Newark for Christmas dinner with them. My family celebrates on Christmas Eve, since everyone has in-laws that also want to see them and I typically work Christmas day for a while to let some of my men have the day off. We are expected to be there by noon, we eat in the evening and then go to Midnight Mass together," I told her. "Do you want to come with me?"

"Of course," Stephanie replied. "But you need to come with me to my family's dinner as well. We'd never hear the end of it if you skipped out. Nothing short of death gets you a pass on a holiday with my mother. Even then, I'm fairly certain she'd sit your carcass at the table Weekend at Bernie's-style and make us all suffer through dinner before finally deciding to call in the undertaker."

"Just let me know what time I should be there. I typically work most of the day, as we run on skeleton crews during holidays, but I can get away for a little while, especially mid-day. We are busiest earlier in the morning when little kids get up early to look for Christmas presents and trip the motion sensors or in the evening, when people come home drunk and forget their alarm codes or burglars decide to ruin someone's day by stealing their new iPad," I finished, recalling last year's calls.

"Sounds good. I've been trying to figure out something to give you for Christmas and I've got nothing. What do you give the man who can have anything and wants nothing?"

I chuckled. "You asked me to move in with you, so I think that can qualify as a gift. If you insist on something for me to open, I suggest you put on something sexy and tie a ribbon around yourself. I'll open you up and play with you all morning long."

Stephanie chuckled quietly, and I knew we were both hoping I could fulfill that promise.


	18. O Holy Night

_A/N: Thanks for the input on the chapter from Ranger's POV. It seems to have been well received, so I will insert them in the story from time to time, when Ranger's POV is important or of particular interest. The story has been particularly angsty for the past few chapters, so it will start to get lighter and back to a more normal tone for a Stephanie story. _

I was standing in my dark green bra and matching panties, staring into my closet. I had two outfits that I was contemplating, but couldn't decide between them. One was the blue dress I saved for family occasions that made my butt look good and the other was a pair of black dress pants with a green silk wrap shirt that showed some cleavage. I was debating whether I wanted to have a nice ass or nice boobs when Ranger walked in. He was wearing a black cashmere sweater, black dress slacks and black loafers. He smiled when he saw me nearly naked.

"Babe, as much as I love what you're wearing, I don't particularly want to have my dad, brother and brothers-in-law ogling you along with me. That's not our idea of bonding."

I grabbed my two choices of outfit and presented them to Ranger. "Which one should I wear today?"

Ranger looked them both over before pointing to the green shirt. "I like seeing you show some cleavage."

I winked at him and pulled on the shirt and pants quickly, grabbing a pair of black pumps to complete the outfit. I did a last minute make-up and hair check before grabbing my coat and purse and following Ranger downstairs. Ranger had told me that his family only bought gifts for the children, so I was spared the need to buy anyone a gift, and since he just sent his siblings money to buy the children gifts from him, we didn't have to worry about dragging them with us to Newark. We took the Cayenne up to Newark this time, as the roads were still a little icy from a light snow fall the night before. We were going to his parents' home, which was where Ranger had grown up prior to moving to Miami. I remembered the neighborhood being somewhat scary when I had visited it with him once before, but it had been because we had to travel through bad areas in order to get to it.

"We need to stop at the train station and pick up my sisters," Ranger told me as we made a detour. "My parents don't have the room for everyone's cars in their driveway, so Silvia and Aurelia have always taken the train into Newark and someone picks them up. It's my turn this time. We'll be a little less crowded this year, since Michael won't be here."

"He's not coming?" I asked, recalling the troubles that seemed to be plaguing the marriage when I'd met him and Silvia over the summer.

"They separated at the beginning of November and Silvia filed for divorce a couple of weeks ago," he replied. "My mother told me when I talked to her the other day."

"Oh, that's too bad."

Ranger shrugged. "Silvia's always been more like me in the relationship department. Neither of us has followed in our older siblings' footsteps of settling down with families. I was surprised when she married Michael a few years ago, but knew it wasn't likely to last. I hate to say this, but my sister's a bit of slut."

I snorted and tried not to laugh. It was one thing to make fun of your own sibling, but different if someone else did it. Not that I thought Ranger would be upset with me, but I didn't want to risk it.

Ranger called Aurelia's cell phone and told her where he was parked once we got to the train station lot. We had been waiting for about five minutes when we saw Aurelia and John cross the lot, both carrying small overnight bags, followed by Silvia. John was on his cell phone and Aurelia and Silvia were chatting animatedly. They opened the cargo area of the Cayenne and put their bags in the back before piling into the car. We exchanged greetings with everyone but John, who had shot dirty looks at all of us while continuing to converse in what sounded like Chinese.

It took us another twenty minutes before we were pulling into an alley behind a row of large older homes that had been well-maintained. Ranger pulled into a driveway behind a two-story red brick home with a detached garage. There was a dark blue SUV, a dark red Camry and a silver minivan already forming parking spots two wide and two deep behind the garage. Ranger pulled in behind the Camry and we all climbed out of the Cayenne. Ranger grabbed my hand and led the way to a back door. He opened the door and called out a greeting. We were met by a cacophony of "Uncle Carlos!" and several children came running to the door. I had seen them at the anniversary party, but not met them officially, as they had been running around talking to their more distant relative and neighbors. The little children hugged his legs while the older ones ambled around him, asking questions and wanting to show him things, trying to shout over one another. The girls got excited to see Silvia come in behind us and ran to hug her, allowing us to walk through the tiny mud room and into the kitchen, which was filled with wonderful aromas of garlic, roasted pork and a pleasant smell of something I didn't recognize. Every bit of the kitchen's island and counter space was filled with food in various stages of completion. I saw Lola and Grandma Rosa busy transferring foods from mixing bowls into pans to be put in the oven, speaking rapid Spanish and pointing to various things in the kitchen. Celia was carrying dishes from the kitchen to what I presumed was the dining room. I could hear Emilio's voice coming from somewhere else in the house, followed by Andres's booming laugh. The kids ran out of the room when Celia yelled at them to go back to the family room. I noticed the children hadn't run up to John and Aurelia the way they had to Ranger and Silvia. Lola wiped her hands on a dish towel and came to greet us.

"Carlos, dear," she said, kissing Ranger on the cheek and giving him a prolonged hug. I wondered how much she knew about his time away, but suspected she must have known it wasn't good, based on the expression on her face. She pulled away from him and embraced me as well.

"It's wonderful to see you again, Stephanie. I'm so happy you could join us."

I hugged her back. "Thank you for inviting me."

Lola pulled away and waved a hand. "You're family now, even if my son hasn't made it legal yet," she said giving him a look that I'd seen my own mother give me a million times when talking about marriage.

Ranger shook his head in mock disgust. "Cuban, Italian or Hungarian—all mothers are the same at the end of the day."

Ranger went over to his grandmother and gave her a kiss on the cheek as she stirred a pot on the stove. They greeted one another in Spanish and I gave her a little wave and I moved towards the doorway on the other side of the room. I walked through and into the dining room, which had a long table decorated with a white table cloth and red taper candles in golden holders. White dishes with green designs shined next to sparkling goblets. I could see that a smaller table was set up in what looked like a family room, and I presumed that was the kids' table.

Lucy walked in from the family room, her pregnant belly looking ready to burst under a blue maternity dress. She looked good, considering how enormous her belly was, but I could tell she was tired of being pregnant.

"Hey you guys," she said, giving me a hug that was made a little awkward by her big belly. "I'm so glad you're here, Stephanie. Welcome to the chaos of another Manoso family gathering."

I smiled back at her. "Thanks. You look great. When are the babies due?"

She put a hand on her abdomen. "In two weeks, but I don't think I can stand another two more hours. I am ready to for these kids to come out already. The doctor told us if we wanted to get labor started, we should have a lot of sex. So if Emilio and I keep disappearing during the day, you know why. I expect you two to cover for us, if people comment on our absences."

Ranger laughed. "Only if you return the favor," he teased, accepting a beer from Emilio, who had just joined us.

"I bet you and Stephanie go at it like rabbits," Emilio said, punching his brother in the arm. "Leave it to those of us who will be sleepless for the next year to enjoy our last few moments of bliss."

I laughed, trying not to think about how long it had been since Ranger and I had actually had sex. He took a swig of his beer, indicating that he was probably thinking along the same wavelength as me.

Javier greeted us warmly a few minutes after we arrived and asked what I would like to drink. I chose a white wine and thanked him when he brought it back moments later. We went to stand over in the corner of the room to avoid being in Celia's way and chatted with Lucy and Emilio about their restaurant and their plans for having help once the twins were born. I could see Sofia in the family room, trying to keep her younger children out of Christmas presents that were piled in the corner under a small Christmas tree.

I loved the dynamics of Ranger's family. They clearly loved one another, with the possible exception of John, and were comfortable with the chaos. It reminded me a little of my family, only larger, Cuban and minus a kid who thought she was a horse and a grandma who thought she was a teenager.

Lucy and Emilio had excused themselves to start on Operation: Labor and Antonio had come up to Ranger, asking how his business was going and asked if he had ever considered expanding in Jersey to cover Newark now that he didn't have to worry about the Atlanta and Boston offices. I excused myself and went to talk to Sofia, who was looking a little overwhelmed with kids.

"Hey, can I help you with anything?" I asked, setting down my wine glass and joining her on the sofa.

Sofia shook her head. "Thanks, but it's mostly just playing referee. Trying to keep Maria and Leo out of the gifts in the hardest."

Maria looked to be about three and Leo was probably five or six. They both looked just like Sofia.

I chatted benignly with Sofia for a few minutes before getting back up to join Ranger, who was walking towards me. We met up in the doorway between the family room and the dining room. Before I could open my mouth to say anything, Emilio's voice boomed from the stairwell.

"Uh-oh, it's Hollywood time!"

The whole room turned to look at me and Ranger, who gave a large sigh and looked up. I followed his gaze to find a sprig of mistletoe hanging above us.

"Oh boy," I said, meeting his gaze. "But what is this Hollywood thing?"

I turned to look at the room of people and saw that even Lola and Grandma Rosa had come out of the kitchen to watch us.

"It's a Manoso tradition," Lucy told me as she came the rest of the way down the stairs. "Whenever a couple gets caught under the mistletoe together, they have to do a Hollywood kiss. You know, the man dips the woman and kisses her thing that you see in old movies."

Oh great. Ranger was not the type to be so dramatic and physically expressive in front of others, but I got the feeling he wouldn't be able to avoid this.

"We've never seen Carlos in action before," Andres piped up. "I can't wait to see this."

Ranger gave me a mischievous smile before grabbing me and dipping me low, one had on my lower back and the other at my neck. He pressed his lips to mine in a tender, but sexier kiss than I thought he would do in front of his family. After a few seconds, he stood us up to a room that whooped and applauded. He shrugged and winked at me while I was a little flushed from being dipped and righted so quickly, not counting the kiss that had made my nipples hard. Thank God for padded bras.

Lucy fanned herself and Emilio patted Ranger on the back. "Damn, Carlos. I need to be careful or Lucy might be trying to hit you up to get her into labor."

The rest of the afternoon went very well, though Ranger and I avoided the doorway between the dining room and the family room. Celia and Andres had been made to go through the Hollywood routine, as had Emilio and Lucy. I noticed Ranger go into the kitchen and talk to his mother while dinner was baking or boiling on the stove. I was talking to Celia about being a BEA, but kept glancing through the doorway to see how Ranger was doing, as he and his mom looked to be having a serious conversation and I thought I'd seen her wipe her eyes more than once. After what felt like an eternity, I saw Lola give Ranger a hug, pulling away to pat his face and say something serious. He nodded and caught me watching them, saying something that caused Lola to look my way. I gave a small wave and smile and turned back to Celia, who was talking about the frustrations of teaching children in today's world of constant standardized testing.

Dinner was served at six on the dot, with the adults crowding around the long dining table and the six children going to the other room. Celia's fourteen year old daughter Katrina moaned and groaned about having to sit at the kids' table, but her mother reminded her she was there to make sure everyone behaved themselves and that she could join the adults next year. I took a spot between Ranger and Lucy, who was looking pale and tired, saying her back was hurting. Javier led the family in prayer and after we made the sign of the cross, everyone began dishing out roasted pork, rice and black beans, fried plantains and salad. Everyone talked and laughed, telling stories of Christmases past. Ranger was a little quieter than he had been at his parents anniversary dinner, and I suspected it was because of whatever he had told his mother. Lucy was growing increasingly uncomfortable next to me and said she didn't feel very hungry. Lola had just brought out the flan for dessert when Lucy let out a shriek.

"Oh, I think my water just broke!"

Pandemonium.

Ranger and I stayed in our seats while Emilio, Lola and Celia began running over to Lucy asking her about contractions and calling the doctor. The kids took the opportunity to start having a food fight in the other room, requiring Andres to go in and start yelling. Emilio left the room to call Lucy's OB and Celia and Lola started making preparations to get Lucy to the hospital. Ten minutes later, order had started to come back around. Ranger had gone to move the Cayenne to let Lucy and Emilio's Camry out for them to go to the hospital. They promised to call with updates about the babies as soon as they knew anything. Another unusual Manoso tradition was revealed to me after dinner was over: the men have to do the clean-up duty. I was particularly surprised, given Latino cultural and machismo and all of that, but the guys didn't complain or think twice about clearing the tables, doing the dishes and taking out the garbage. I enjoyed watching Ranger clear the table and dry dishes that were being washed by John, since the only domestic things I had ever seen him do were rinse dishes to put in the dishwasher, and I'd once seen him turn on the broiler to toast a bagel when the toaster was broken.

Around eighty-thirty, Emilio called to say that Lucy would be undergoing a Cesarean at nine for the babies' delivery. Celia declared it was time for the kids to start opening their presents and then she, Javier, Lola, Grandma Rosa and whoever else wanted to go would leave for the hospital to see the babies before Mass. Sofia said it was her turn this year to go to Mass and Antonio would be taking the three younger kids home to get ready for bed. The rest of women in the family planned to go to hospital and looked at me expectantly. I glanced at Ranger who raised an eyebrow in a manner that said 'it's your call'. I returned with shrug that said 'what the hell, I'll go'. Ranger, Andres and John stayed behind to watch the three remaining kids, who complained loudly about not getting to go to the hospital. We took the Cayenne and Celia's SUV to the hospital and were told to go up to the fifth floor. We had to sign in at the reception desk and were told we could go back in groups of four to see Lucy and the twins. She'd had a boy that they had named Liam, and a little girl they had named Layla. Celia, Javier, Rosa and Lola had gone in first, while Sofia, Silvia, Aurelia and I hung out in the waiting room. Every few minutes, we would hear a lullaby playing over the speakers, which Sofia stated was the indication that another baby had been born. We got to go in fifteen minutes later and see the babies and Lucy, who was still a little dopey from pain-killers. Emilio was shining with pride over his new children. I held one of the babies, the girl I think, and passed her along. I took photos of each baby with my phone to show Ranger when we got back to the Manoso's house. As we walked out of the hospital, I heard Lola say something to the rest of the group in Spanish. They all nodded and walked over to Celia's SUV, leaving me and Lola to ride in the Cayenne.

"Carlos told me about what happened in Somalia," she began once we were in the car and I was trying to find the exit to the parking garage. "He didn't go into too many details, but I can read between the lines. I was absolutely horrified to think of my son going through so much pain, both physically and emotionally, but he told me how wonderful you have been and how much you have supported him and that made me feel more hopeful about his recovery." Lola started to tear up and wiped her eyes.

"I just wanted to say thank you for loving my son so much and for sticking it out with him. If you can survive such a horrific trauma, you can survive anything."

I felt my own throat swell up as she spoke and blinked away tears so that I didn't crash into a median. "It's not been easy, and most of the time I feel like I'm walking in the dark, but he tells me that I am helping him and he has gotten better in the past few weeks." I refrained from mentioning our lack of a sex life. I knew without a doubt that Ranger would have never talked to his mother about that.

Lola patted my shoulder and we rode the rest of the way in silence, except for her directions on where to turn to get back to her house. We walked inside to find Ranger regaling his nephews and Andres with a story about catching an FTA out on the Point Pleasant boardwalk, which had sent the eleven year old boys into hysterics. Katrina was listening and painting her nails a bright red color that she had been given as a gift. John was glued to his cell phone in the corner. I quickly wondered if John even used his cell phone when having sex. If so, I at least hope he had the decency to use Bluetooth.

I showed Ranger the pictures of his new niece and nephew and we had to listen to fifteen minutes of his mother and sisters telling him how great I looked holding a baby. Ranger informed them that he had seen me hold my niece when she was born, but they ignored him.

We left for Mass at eleven fifteen and were able to find enough seats together in a pew for the entire family. When the songs started during the Mass, I found myself not singing very loudly in order to hear Ranger sing, which was a new experience. I was amazed at how smooth his voice was and it made me feel a little weepy. Not a difficult feat since we were singing O Holy Night, which had the same effect on me as funerals. I saw Ranger's lips twitch when he saw me wipe away some tears and he put an arm around my waist, pulling me close to him and pressing a kiss into my hair. After Mass was over, we said our good-byes, as Ranger and I were headed back to Trenton. He would be covering a shift starting at six in the morning, so I was going to drive and let him get a jump start on his sleep. Lola and Celia had asked for my phone number so they could call me rather than using Ranger, the non-conversationalist, as a medium. I had found a couple of business cards in my wallet for them and we waved good-bye. Ranger fell asleep once we got on the Turnpike and slept until right before I pulled into my driveway. We walked inside, both exhausted. We got ready for bed and kissed goodnight before zonking out.

I woke up alone the next morning. The clock by the bed told me it was nine, which meant Ranger had left more than three hours earlier. I got in the shower, dressed and went downstairs for coffee and a light snack before Christmas dinner at one that afternoon. I walked over to the coffee pot and found a small black box sitting in front of the coffee maker. A note written in Ranger's handwriting that read "Merry Christmas, Stephanie" rested in front of it. I picked up the box and lifted the lid, finding a pair of sapphire earrings. They were exquisite and I immediately put them in, admiring my reflection in the mirror and how they brought out my eyes. I loved that Ranger had good taste in jewelry and always seemed to know just what to give me. It wasn't much different from his typical form in bed.

I got my coffee and ate some toast before deciding to head over to my parents. I had overslept morning Mass, so I would just get to my parents' house when my mom and grandma would be there preparing Christmas dinner.

I made it to my parents' by a little after eleven, followed by Valerie, Albert and the girls at noon. The house was in chaos, with the little two girls crying over something or other, Mary Alice galloping around and Albert constantly dropping or knocking over things in his effort to help. Ranger arrived at five minutes to one. He had opened the door and saw the mania that was in full-force. He had the look of a man who was hoping he could back out quietly and walk away without being seen, but I saw him and gave him the look that said he'd regret it if he tried. Ranger sighed and walked in the door, coming into the dining room where I was setting the last of the food on the table. He greeted me with a chaste kiss over the ear.

"Thank you for my earrings," I told him. "They are perfect and bring out my eyes."

He looked like he was thinking of smiling. "That was the plan, babe."

We all sat down at the table and said grace, the only time of the year we did so, and began eating. There were four bottles of wine on the table and all of the adults had a glass except Ranger, who would be going back to work until six that night. Dinner with Ranger's family had been fun and relaxing, even with the drama of Lucy going into labor. Dinner with my family required a bottle of Advil. Grandma and Albert both got shit-faced on the wine, Mary Alice started flinging food at Angie, who responded in earnest. The baby was inconsolable, which meant we had to yell to be heard. I saw the hint of a smile on Ranger's lips.

"What's so funny?" I asked him quietly as I finished up my green beans.

"I used to think my family was insane, but now that I've spent more time with your family, I'm realizing my family is pretty damn normal," he replied, putting his hand on my leg and squeezing my thigh.

I was having a hard time concentrating on what he was saying with his hand on my leg, so I discreetly moved his hand higher up my thigh, so that it was resting almost level with his favorite part of my body. I saw his eyes dilate slightly and I gave him a coy smile. "You'll get your present later," I whispered to him.

I could tell he was excited and I knew we were both hoping tonight would be the night Ranger got his groove back. Ranger declined dessert as usual, excusing himself with the fact that he had told his men he would only be gone an hour and wishing everyone a merry Christmas, though not before Grandma Mazur got up and started dancing the Funky Chicken in an effort to make the baby stop crying. I could tell Ranger nearly lost it at the sight of my grandma flapping her arms.

I left the house around five that evening, having watched the kids open their gifts and part of a football game with my dad. I'd managed to not drink as much as usual so that I could stay awake to give Ranger his gift. I went home with leftovers and the new sweater my mother had given me for Christmas. I put away the food and started getting dressed in the sexy black silk nightie I had bought. It fell several inches above my knee, was very low cut and easily removed. I also put on the do-me heels again, as Ranger loved seeing me in high heels. I was just lighting candles when I heard him come in the back door and call out my name.

"Upstairs," I yelled, sitting on the corner of the bed nearest the door. I crossed my legs and hoped I looked sexy. Ranger came up the stairs and smiled when he saw me. I stood up and gave him a sexy, meaningful kiss.

"Merry Christmas. Do you like?" I asked, waving my arms up and down my body like a Bob Barker Beauty showing off a prize.

Ranger took my hand and pressed it to his groin, which was very hard. "Does that answer your question?"

He had left his utility belt downstairs, so getting him undressed wasn't as complicated an event as it had been in the past. He was completely naked first, leaving me in my heels and negligee. He moved one of the straps down my arm, kissing my shoulder before repeating the same movement on the other strap. I pulled my arms out of straps and let the black silk pool at my feet. Ranger pushed me down onto the bed, but knelt on the floor beside the bed rather than climbing on top of me. He had his mouth on me, making me writhe and groan, giving me an orgasm in record time. Feeling more relaxed, I scooted up higher in the bed so that he could get in with me. He kissed me again, and slid into me at the same time. I could feel him tense up a little as he started thrusting into me, but I kept kissing him, whispering his name and telling him how much I loved him. It didn't take long for the both of us to moan loudly, feeling satisfied and elated that we had finally been able to have sex. It hadn't been as perfect as it typically was, but it had surely been better than our last attempt.

I cuddled into Ranger as we fell asleep, thinking that surely by the New Year, we would be almost completely back to normal.


	19. Auld Lang Syne

_A/N: Not a particularly exciting chapter, but some interesting information. Thanks for reading._

In the week leading up to New Year's Eve, Ranger's mood seemed lighter than it had been since Somalia. Granted, "lighter" in Ranger still looked as dark as night compared to normal people, but because I knew him well I was able to see the shift. I knew he was still working through some of the trauma, but he was doing much better than anyone else would have been only six weeks on. I would have never been capable of functioning as well as he was at that point. I was still traumatized over Rex's death two weeks ago. Every time I walked past the little flower pot on my porch, my eyes welled up with tears, and I usually had to take a few minutes to pull it together before attempting to drive. Ranger's move to put him there until I could bury him the backyard in the spring had meant more to me than all of the things Morelli had ever done for me.

Over the last few months, I had noticed major differences in Morelli and Ranger outside of the obvious Italian versus Cuban, law man versus mercenary, overtly agitated versus dangerously quiet qualities. Morelli had loved me, I didn't doubt that, but his love had come with a lot of strings. He always hated my job, hated my affiliation with Ranger, and tended point out my flaws more often that I wanted to hear about them. He was constantly trying to change me for a while, but even after he quit trying so hard to make me into someone else, I could tell he was constantly hoping to wake up one day and find a new and improved Stephanie Plum waiting to get married and pop out little Morellis. Ranger was the opposite. He never made an overt moves to change me and didn't complain about my job or my life in general. He simply loved me and wanted to make sure I was safe while doing my thing, which I appreciated tremendously.

When I woke up on New Year's Eve morning, I was surprised to find Ranger still in bed with me at eight o'clock. I softly nudged him, wondering if he had managed something only normal humans do—sleeping through the alarm.

"Hey, are you not going into the office this morning?" I asked quietly.

Ranger opened his eyes and shook his head. "I always work New Year's Eve night, so I'm not going in so early. I'm doing patrols alone from six tonight until six in the morning. We need more people in the control center responding to calls due to people either being shit-faced and forgetting about the alarm, or opportunistic criminals."

Of course he was working. That was a good thing about having Ranger as a boss, and a bad thing about having Ranger as a boyfriend. He tried to go a little easier on his employees during the holidays, so he would cover a lot of shifts on those days in order to give people with families the time off they wanted. He seemed to have the arrangements figured out for Thanksgiving and Christmas, but Ranger wasn't used to spending New Year's Eve with anyone. And I wasn't used to spending it alone.

"Can I come out and patrol with you?" I blurted out before I could stop myself.

Ranger looked surprised at my question, but not entirely unhappy. "If that's what you want."

I thought about it for a moment. "I do. Why should we both have to be alone, when I'll just sitting around eating junk food and watching mindless television? At least I'll be more active and less likely to eat my weight in potato chips and Tastykakes by going out with you."

That got a small smile out of Ranger. "Very true, Babe."

Ranger left for the office around two that afternoon, saying he wanted to get some paperwork done, and that he would stop by around six to pick me up for our patrol. I was dressed in Rangeman black and had my black messenger bag stocked with a couple of magazines I had picked up at the store, a bottle of soda to help keep me awake and a bottle of water. I also had a few Butterscotch Tastykakes packed for an emergency, like if Ranger got out of the car and I could scarf one down without him seeing. Ranger didn't allow food in the company vehicles. Especially junk food.

Ranger pulled up at the curb promptly at six, and I ran out to meet him in an effort to both stay warm and to keep my hair from getting too wet from the falling snow and turning into a frizzy nightmare. He had taken off his coat, which was lying in the seat behind him and was wearing a long-sleeved Rangeman T-shirt. Once I was inside and buckled in, he reached between the seats and handed me a utility belt.

"Gun, stun gun, pepper spray," he replied as I took it and he pulled away from the curb.

"Didn't you think I'd bring this stuff with me?"

"Did you?"

"Well, no. But it was despicable of you to presume I wouldn't."

Ranger shook his head. He was probably thinking it was going to be a long night and that before it was over, he'd want to use his gun on one of us. Likely me.

We did brief patrols through some of the wealthier neighborhoods in Trenton, Whitehorse and Hamilton Township. We saw lots of people either headed out to parties or cars filling driveways to attend the parties. The Rangeman center called every half hour with an update, which so far had been quiet. We finished our initial residential patrols and began doing patrols on some buildings that Rangeman was keeping clear of clutter, which I presumed meant drug dealers, prostitutes and the homeless. We stopped and did walk-throughs of each building, checking the apartments for signs of squatters.

By ten-thirty however, I was starting to get incredibly bored. Not that I wanted to be chasing after someone or being shot at while on the job with Ranger, but the tedium was killing me. Ranger was his typical silent-self, and I had already read both of the magazines I brought with me. I'd also managed to choke down a Tastykake when Ranger had done a walk-through of one of the smaller buildings by himself.

We were driving through downtown Trenton when I made the decision to attempt small talk. It wasn't Ranger's thing, but as his girlfriend I felt I had the right to push him out of his comfort zone a little.

"You've seemed to be doing better the last week or so," I told Ranger.

Ranger shrugged. "Time goes by, it gets easier. Being able to have sex again helps."

"It's only been six weeks; you are the only person I know who could possibly be doing this well after such a short period of time."

Ranger didn't say anything for a moment, but stayed focused on his driving.

"I've figured out why it happened, and I've accepted it," he said quietly.

Something in Ranger's tone and choice of words bothered me, though I couldn't quite place the feeling.

"What does that mean? Why do you think it happened?" I managed to ask a couple of minutes later.

Ranger pulled to a stop in front of a building we were going to be monitoring, as it was a hot bed for drug deals. He turned the car off, but didn't look my way. He kept his gaze on the dilapidated brick building, which had several windows missing and a large chain keeping the double doors closed.

"I've decided it was punishment for some of the wrong I've done in my life."

I felt nauseous at Ranger's words. Did he honestly believe that getting sexually assaulted was a form of karmic retribution for his mercenary lifestyle?

"That is not true, Ranger," I told him, hoping he would look at me. "Sexual assault is a horrific power play by the aggressor, not a punishment for the victim."

Ranger snorted lightly. "For others, yes, but not me. Stephanie, if you knew half the things I've done in my life, you would agree. Hell, you'd probably leave me if you knew."

As I sat and watched him for a few minutes, I knew two things were certain: Ranger had done some things in his life that would cause him grief for the rest of his day, and that I would never leave him because of them.

"Tell me."

Ranger turned to look at me for the first time since we stopped, a slightly confused look on his face. "Tell you what?"

I took a deep breath. "Tell me what you've done that you think is worthy of this punishment."

Ranger shook his head and turned away from me again. "Absolutely not."

I took his face in my hands and forced him to look me in the eye. "Yes, I want you to tell me. I know the guilt eats you alive and that you'll never have complete peace because of it. If I'm going to spend my life with you, I think I deserve to know why."

Ranger held my gaze and was so still, I wasn't even sure if he was breathing. "I don't think you'll be able to look at me. You won't want me to touch you or to be anywhere near you. I can't look at your sweet, innocent face and tell you everything I've ever done. I would feel like a monster."

I bit my bottom lip in an effort not to cry. Ranger's pain was evident in his words, even though his physical demeanor and the tone of his voice were even. I leaned over and kissed him lightly.

"I will not leave you, not matter what you tell me. I have long accepted that you have done things that I would never do, but I also know you and know you would never do something without a reason. Please tell me. It might do you good to tell someone."

Ranger removed my hands from his face and turned back to face the building once more. I let out a sigh, accepting defeat. I would never be able to force Ranger to do anything that he didn't want to do, but had hoped he would know he could trust me and that I would stand by him regardless. It made me sad to think that he didn't have that much faith in me.

"Have you ever raped anyone? Or sexually assaulted them in any way?"

Ranger's head whipped around to look at me and I recoiled slightly, worried that he might yell at me.

"Never. That's one line I won't cross."

I repressed a sigh of relief. I didn't think Ranger would do something like that, but it was still a relief to hear him say so.

"Then you didn't deserve what happened to you in Somalia," I told him, trying to add a tone of finality to my voice. I didn't want him to believe that he had been traumatized, both physically and emotionally, for his past misdeeds. He had done bad things, but I had to believe that some of the good things he had done in recent years helped to atone for it.

"Drop it, Stephanie. It's how I feel about the situation, and you aren't going to change my mind."

I decided to let it drop for the moment, even though I didn't want to. I wanted him to know I would accept him regardless, but knew I'd have to come up with something different.

"Well then, let's focus on the biggest sin you've ever committed: how many times have you ever lied to me?" I said, trying to make my tone serious, but with a slightly playful air.

Ranger slowly turned his head to look at me, incredulity evident in his features. "That's the biggest sin of them all? Lying to my girlfriend?"

I nodded. "Yep, you'll really rot in hell if you don't 'fess up to me right now.

A small smile played at the corner of Ranger's lips. "Since you put it that way, I have lied to you in the past, but you've always found out the truth one way or the other. The only time I've lied and you've not learned the truth was over the summer, when I told you the number of women I'd slept with."

I felt my heart skip a beat. I had thought that number was too good to be true, but had believed it because of Ranger's outstanding self-control and solitary lifestyle.

"Ok, so what's the real number?" I asked, trying not to sound completely pissed off, even though I was. I had rung this bell, now I was going to have to listen to the tune.

"I told you twenty-six because that's the number of women I've been with since I left the Army. There were twenty-four during my time in the Army, fifteen during my two years in college, and twenty during high school. That makes it a total of seventy-five."

I felt my blood pressure start to rise. "That's three times as many as you made me believe, asshole! I can't believe you lied to me about that."

"I lied because of this reaction. I didn't want you to wig out on me. It's all in the past, Babe. The only woman I've been with in the past three years is you."

Whoa…did he really just say—"You've not been with anyone else in _three_ years?"

Ranger shook his head. "After our first time together, I realized I couldn't bring myself to sleep with someone else when I was in love with you. I may not care about crossing boundaries with women who are in relationships, but I won't let myself betray someone I love."

I was somewhere between bursting into tears and vomiting after that statement. Ranger's devotion to me in spite of the fact that I had been with Morelli was overwhelming. It made me realize just how deep his love for me went. It also made me feel tremendously guilty. My feelings for Ranger had always been so confusing, so I had kept seeing Morelli even though I wasn't completely devoted to him either. Did I love Ranger as much as he loved me? Was it possible? I knew I loved Ranger more than I had ever loved anyone, but did it match his love? And could we live with it if it turned out that he did love me more? Was matching depth of feelings necessary for a successful relationship?

I shook my head in an effort to clear it. These were the thoughts I kept for time spent in the shower. I needed to get back to the issue at hand.

"That almost makes up for lying to me about your number," I told Ranger. "But in order for me to truly forgive you, I want you to tell me if I know any of these seventy-five women and who she or they are."

I saw the corners of Ranger's mouth twitch again. He probably thought I was insane, but wisely chose not to verbalize his opinion. He was in the doghouse and wanted to get out.

"You know of Rachel, obviously. Other than her, you know two of them, though I'm not sure if I should tell you about one of them, considering she doesn't even remember sleeping with me and I've never reminded her," Ranger said.

"How could a woman not remember sleeping with you? You're spectacular."

Ranger laughed. "So I've been told. But the reason she doesn't remember is because she was incredibly drunk when it happened."

I shifted in my seat so that I could look at Ranger better. "Tell me who it was."

Ranger looked down at the steering wheel and traced a finger over the SUV's emblem. "It was Connie."

There was a full minute of silence, both inside the car and my head.

Oh. My. God. No. Fucking. Way.

"Connie? As in Connie Rossoli from the bond's office? The Connie that I work with every day?"

I could barely fathom what Ranger had just told me. He had slept with Connie? And she didn't remember it? Poor Connie…

Ranger nodded. "Yep."

"Um, details please." I managed to say after a moment of pure shock.

Ranger gave me an incredulous look.

"Not _those_ kind of details. I meant how did it happen? What was the situation that got her drunk and you in her bed?"

"It was about eight years ago, right after she started working for Vinnie. She was recently divorced and had gone out drinking one night. She got completely trashed and the bartender, who was a friend of mine, called me to pick her up since he knew we worked together. I picked her up and she started groping me, telling me she wanted me and couldn't wait any longer. I parked my car in the alley behind the bond's office and we went at it. She passed out on the way home, so I got her inside and left. When I saw her the next day, she thanked me for picking her up at the bar, saying she had gone there that morning to pick up her car and asked who had taken her home. She had only a vague memory of going to the bar and starting to drink, and definitely no memory of me picking her up. I decided not to bring it up."

I was fairly certain I'd been staring at Ranger with an open mouth for a good five minutes before I found my voice again. I dug through my bag and pulled out the bottle of water, taking a long drag before speaking.

"Wow. That's all I can say about it—wow. Who else is on this list? If you say Lula or my sister, I'm going to die."

"Definitely not. The other person is Jeanne Ellen Burrows," Ranger said, looking me in the eye as he said it.

"Was it just a one-time thing, or did you guys have an ongoing relationship?"

"We never had a regular relationship, if that's what you're asking. It's only ever been sexual or work-related between us."

I didn't want to know any more details about Jeanne Ellen. She was the female version of Ranger, and I suspected he wished I were more like that. Her boobs and ass were far better than mine, and she was much less of a train wreck. I already hated Jeanne Ellen Burrows because of how amazingly perfect she was. Now I hated her even more because she'd done the deed with Ranger.

We resumed our silence once more, and I was contemplating whether to join a gym so I could get an ass like Jeanne Ellen's when my cell phone rang. I didn't recognize the number, but the area code told me it was a northern Jersey number.

It turned out to be Lola Manoso.

"Hello, Stephanie," she said when I answered the phone. "I just wanted to call and say Happy New Year, and to ask how Carlos is doing. I haven't talked to him since Christmas."

"Hi Lola," I said, causing Ranger to look at me in mild surprise. "Happy New Year to you as well. We're well. I'm actually out working with Carlos tonight. He was going out on his patrol all alone, and since I had nothing better to do, I asked to join him."

"Is he ok? Were you worried about him?"

"Oh no, everything's going great," I replied, hoping Ranger would think that I was referring to our shift.

"That's a relief. I've been so worried about him, but I know I can't push him to talk too much, or he'll shut down completely. I also wanted to tell you that you are welcome to visit anytime, even if Carlos won't come with you. I'll let you get back to your evening, but may I speak to Carlos for a minute?"

"Sure," I said, handing Ranger my phone.

He took the phone and greeted his mother in Spanish. "Hola."

He listened for a minute, his mouth curving into a small smile. "You know her well already, Mom. I'm impressed."

He listened for a minute longer before saying good-bye and ending the call. "My mom wants me to marry you, since you were willing to give up an evening of television and junk food to come sit with me and watch for criminals."

I put my phone back in my bag. "She's right. I could be watching _Ghostbusters_ and working my way through Tastykakes right now."

"Don't be such a martyr; you have some in your bag. You could be eating one now if you wanted to."

I gave Ranger a mock glare. "Snoop. I'm still a little pissed at you for lying to me."

"I thought I was forgiven by telling you who you knew out of my past sexual partners?"

"That was before I had to hear about Jeanne Ellen."

"You're more upset about Jeanne Ellen than Connie?"

"I'm stunned about Connie, but not angry because Connie was drunk, has no memory of it and would feel bad if she did. Jeanne Ellen is just irritatingly smug and perfect in every way. I'm sure she's also perfect in bed."

I really, really hated Jeanne Ellen. She was slowly creeping up near the top of my Shit List, where Dickie Orr and Joyce Barnhardt had held firm positions for nearly a decade.

Ranger started the SUV and drove down an alley behind the building we were monitoring, checking the back for anyone trying to break in without us seeing them from the street. All was quiet.

"Jeanne Ellen may be more successful as a BEA, but she can't hold a candle to you in bed, Babe."

I snorted. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"You said yourself the sex we have is 'spectacular', right?"

"Yes, but it's because you're so good. You know exactly what to do, and how to do it."

"Babe, you and I make love on thousand-count sheets, whereas Jeanne Ellen and I fucked in alleyways behind bars. The reason the sex is so great with you is because we have that emotional connection, in addition to the physical attraction. With Jeanne Ellen, it was purely sex. We didn't have any emotional connection, outside of a mutual respect for each other as professionals. I don't even consider her a friend."

Okay, so now I was feeling a little smug after that. Jeanne Ellen probably hadn't enjoyed her orgasms as much as I do because she was busy bruising her tailbone against a brick wall that had probably been peed on a thousand times that week. One point to Stephanie.

"Fine, you're forgiven," I told Ranger, glancing at the clock on the dashboard. It was five minutes to twelve. I was just about to comment on it nearly being the new year when Ranger's phone rang with his update from the control center. There had been an attempted break-in at a residential account in Hamilton Township, but the homeowner had simply pulled out his shotgun and told the person trying to open his patio doors to get the fuck off his property before he put a bullet in his ass. The perpetrator had taken off, and the homeowner had declined Rangeman or police assistance. Problem handled, Jersey-style. Ranger ended the call and pulled away from the curb where he had parked after leaving the alley. He had told me we would run the circuit we had done earlier in the night again after midnight before returning to walkthrough buildings again. How his men kept from killing themselves on the job was beyond me. It was incredibly dull.

We had stopped at light when Ranger's watch beeped, indicating it was midnight. He grabbed the lapel of my jacket and pulled towards him, kissing me softly.

"Happy New Year, babe," he said, leaning back into his seat as the light changed to green.

I felt my phone start vibrating and dug it back out of my bag as Ranger stopped in front of an old apartment building that needed a second walkthrough. I had "Happy New Year!" texts from Connie, Lula and a number I didn't recognize, but that was signed Celia.

"I like your family a lot," I told Ranger as we climbed out of the SUV. "They call and text me to tell me Happy New Year after meeting me three times. My own family doesn't do that."

Ranger put an arm around my waist as we walked up to the door of the building. "They love you, babe. For who you are, and because you make me happy."

We didn't talk as we made our walkthrough of the building, which was being inhabited by a couple of strung-out junkies that must have crept in after we left earlier in the evening. We escorted them outside and watched them walk away before getting into the SUV and heading back out to Whitehorse for our patrol route. My mind had been consumed the entire time with thoughts of Ranger and his family. When he was with them, I could tell he loved his family, but that he was a bit of an outsider. I wasn't sure if it was because he was so emotionally closed-off in contrast to the rest of the family or because of living away from them for so many years.

"How often do you see your family?" I asked as Ranger turned into a moderately wealthy neighborhood that contained several Rangeman accounts.

"Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and usually once during the summer," he replied.

"Do you talk to them on the phone much?"

"When they call, or I call them on their birthdays. Why so much interest?"

I shrugged. "Everyone seems so close, but you seem much more distant. I wasn't sure if it was more of your own doing or theirs."

Ranger was quiet for a moment. "I think it's a combination of circumstance and my own doing. I've told you before that I stole a car when I was fourteen and went to juvenile detention for six months. My parents told me the day they picked me up that I was going to Miami with live with Grandma Bella, and that we would be leaving in four hours. I had enough time to see my siblings and my Grandma Rosa before we left town. After that, I only saw my family four weeks a year for the next four years—a week at Christmas, a week at Spring Break, and two weeks in the summer. I matured and grew up differently than the rest of my siblings did in Newark, so by the time I came back to go to college, I already felt different. By the time I returned home on my first leave from the Army, I wondered how I could have ever come from that family. Don't get me wrong—I love my family. I just feel different from them."

Ranger's experience with his family couldn't have been further from the experiences I'd had with mine. Sure there were days when I seriously questioned how I could be related to Valerie or Grandma Mazur, but I knew deep down that I was just overlooking things. I had the feeling Ranger had seriously questioned this about himself.

"Do you resent your parents for sending you away?" I asked after a few moments reflection.

"I used to. I stopped resenting them for what they did when I agreed to let Ron adopt Julie. I knew then that they had made a difficult decision, but that they had done what they thought was best for me, regardless of how it may have hurt them. I would have been dead long before now, or at the very least in jail, had they not sent me to Miami. I'm thankful they did. I wouldn't have ever had Julie, or met you. I would have wasted my life being a thug."

I put a hand on Ranger's leg and gave it a little squeeze, not saying anything else. There was nothing more to say, because everything he'd said had been exactly right. We eventually made it back to Stark Street and parked once more outside of the building we were monitoring. It was approaching two in the morning, so I was starting to get incredibly drowsy. I was about to doze off when an old, ugly wooden-paneled station wagon pulled to the curb twenty feet in front of us. It couldn't tell who was driving, but a minute later, a hooker wearing a fake fur coat and purple sequin shoes walked up to the car and leaned through the driver's side window. She talked to the driver for a minute before stepping back. A white guy in his early sixties stepped out and opened the back door for the hooker, who shook out of her fur coat before crawling in. The man got in the car behind her and a few minutes later, the car started to rock side-to-side.

"Do you think they know we're here and can see everything?" I asked Ranger, my eyebrows going up as the rocking became more obvious.

"I think they don't care," Ranger replied. "I hope he gets the shocks checked on his car later. They've really got it rocking."

Eventually, I was able to hear some moaning even through their closed windows and ours. "Geez, for an older man, he's really going at it."

"Might be test driving a new pill."

The car rocked for another ten minutes before I heard a scream that sounded more like someone being stabbed than someone having an orgasm. The rocking stopped and two minutes later, the hooker got out of the car, pulling her dress back down and wrapping her coat around herself. I thought she looked like she was walking a little stiffly as she headed back into the shadows, but she seemed to be smiling. Either the man was really good, or he'd paid her really well. The man climbed out after her, got back into the driver's seat and pulled away, never once looking back at the SUV.

"Damn," I said a minute later. I'd gotten a little turned on seeing the station wagon rocking like that. I had been wondering if Ranger and I could rock the SUV the same way. But not in the middle of Stark Street, of course. I am a lady. Who wants to live.

I looked over at Ranger, who had a mischievous glint in his eye. "Getting ideas, Babe?"

I bit my bottom lip and nodded. "Do you think we could rock this car like that?"

Ranger started the SUV and pulled away from the curb. "Only one way to find out."

It turned out that Ranger and I can rock the SUV like that.


	20. Blow Me (One Last Kiss)

Chapter 20

The first four days of January passed without incident. My relationship with Ranger was going great since our sex life had returned to almost normal and I hadn't had any issues with my FTAs. January fifth, however, turned out to be complete shit.

Ranger had stopped by the house around noon and joined me for lunch while I reviewed my file for Joaquin Velazquez, a medium-high level drug dealer who had skipped out on bail. He was supposed to have shown up for court on the third, but Joaquin had apparently not added 'obeying the law' to his New Year's resolutions. I'd gone to his last known address, which turned out to be a burned out former crack house, but no one was around. I had tracked down Velazquez's mother, who told me in no uncertain terms that she would not tell me where her son was, and suggested I fuck myself with something sharp. I'd called his girlfriend Alicia next, trying a different tactic that I was hopeful would be a success.

"Is Joaquin available?" I asked when she answered.

"Who is this?" Alicia asked, sounding defensive.

"This is Shelia. I need to talk to Joaquin right away," I told her. "He got me pregnant."

"What?!" I pulled the phone away from my ear as Alicia's voice went up three octaves. I was fairly certain I heard a dog three houses down start to howl.

"Yeah, it's true. He knocked me up. I'm having twins, and he'd better be ready to pay child support and to buy me the things I need for these babies. Do you know where I can find him? I want to tell him in person so he can't avoid me," I replied, watching Ranger break out into a wide smile.

"Yeah, I'll tell you where he is. He's out in Chicago, dealing out of a club called "Xchange". He told me he has an apartment on Lakeshore Drive, but now I'm thinking he's full of shit. When you find him, tell him not to come back to my house or I'll shoot his lying, cheating dick off." And with that, Alicia hung up.

"Damn. Well, I've got good news and bad news. The good news is I know where he is. The bad news is he is in Chicago. I guess I'll have to pass this one on to you, since Vinnie thinks I can't go do these out-of-state skips on my own," I told Ranger, stabbing my salad with more force than necessary. Velazquez was a high bond, but Vinnie only allowed Ranger or himself to go fetch FTAs that had left the state.

"It doesn't have to come to me. I'll show you how to bring in people from out-of-state so Vinnie can give them all to you," Ranger replied. "My company doesn't really need the money from FTAs anymore, so I don't mind to give them up. Especially when they'll be going to you."

I looked up at Ranger in surprise.

"Doesn't Vinnie have to give his blessing on this? He also goes to pick up out-of-state FTAs," I asked, feeling a little pleased that Ranger had that much faith in me.

"Vinnie only goes to get the ones that have already been picked up by police. He doesn't want to have to make the effort to actually apprehend them himself. I'll tell him that I will come with you for the first couple of times and then you'll be on your own, unless you ask for my help. Besides, there are bigger issues than just Vinnie's opinion on the matter. Bounty hunting is illegal in Illinois, so we are going to have to get Velazquez out of the state before officially arresting him. But we'll worry about that once we've found him."

I collected my dishes and stood, stopping to kiss Ranger on the cheek. "You're fantastic. This is one of the most significant differences between you and Morelli. He would've told me that I wasn't very good at picking up the FTAs in town, so going out of town to a state where bounty hunting is illegal would be a disaster and to just let you go get him."

Ranger picked up his own dishes and followed me into the kitchen. "I may not be the most experienced when it comes to romantic relationships, but I'm fairly certain that being nothing like your ex-boyfriend is a positive thing. I hope Morelli and I are different in everything from our morals to our diets and our preferred sexual positions."

I thought about the similarities and differences between Ranger and Morelli as I finished my bottle of water. The two men that I've loved most recently in my life had very few similarities. They were both intelligent and sexy, but in very different ways.

"Morelli ate more like me, but stayed mostly on the right side of the law and preferred doggy-style sex."

Ranger stopped dead in his move to put his plate in the dishwasher and gave me a strange look. "I didn't need to know that, babe."

"I didn't realize I said it out loud," I told Ranger sheepishly.

He shook his head and finished up his task. "At least I know I'm better in bed. That's all that matters in the end."

"How do you know you're better? I never said anything about being better, just different," I teased.

"Because I happen to know doggy-style isn't _your_ preferred position, and that I'm incredibly good in bed."

I punched him lightly on the arm. "There's at least one similarity: you're both very modest."

Ranger pulled me into him for a quick kiss. "I have to get back to the office. When I get home later, we'll go over our plan to pick up Velazquez."

I spent the rest of the day running Velazquez and Xchange through the search programs on Ranger's computer. Velazquez's bank accounts didn't show me any sort of rent payment or home purchases. Xchange showed to be a popular hip-hop club in downtown Chicago with several well-known bad guys working out of it in various arenas, including prostitution, drugs, illegal guns and stolen goods. The club sounded like it had a back door that was a portal into Hell.

Ranger came home around six that evening to find me shaping a meatloaf in a baking dish. He watched in mild surprise as I put the meatloaf in the oven and set the timer. "Did you really make that?"

"Yes," I told him as I walked over to the sink to wash my hands. "I'm trying to be more domestic than I've been in the past, but less so than my mother. I don't want to become so domestic that I relieve stress by ironing every article of clothing we own."

Ranger uncorked a bottle of wine and poured us each a glass while I told him about what I'd found on Velazquez.

"He's working for someone higher than him on the drug-pusher food chain," Ranger informed me. "There's no way he had the time to establish himself in a club that big in a city like Chicago in the two months since he was arrested. I don't have many contacts in Chicago, but I'll see what I can find out about the situation."

My meatloaf turned out pretty well, though not quite as good as my mother's. Once we had cleaned up, Ranger pulled out his cell phone and made a couple of calls as I headed to the living room. I could tell he was speaking Spanish when he spoke to the first of the people he called, even though I had no idea what he said beyond 'Hola' and 'Adios'. When he called his second contact, he spoke a language I didn't recognize and had definitely never him use in my presence. I knew Ranger was multilingual, but had never learned how many languages he actually spoke. His second conversation was shorter than the first and he hung up within a few minutes.

"My first contact informed me that a dealer named Z used to work out of Xchange, and that if Velazquez is doing business there, it means he's working for Z. Otherwise, he would been floating in Lake Michigan. The second one says that Xchange is now dealing with a better class of people than in the past and that getting into the club is difficult. He says we'll never be able to see Velaquez come and go, as the people who deal out of the club use a different entrance. He can get us details about when Velaquez shows up at the club and can get us in."

"What language were you speaking with the second person? I didn't recognize it," I told Ranger. "In fact, I don't know what languages you do speak, outside of Spanish and English."

"The second guy is from Syria originally, so I was speaking to him in Arabic. I speak six languages fluently: English, Spanish, Farsi, Arabic, Kurdish, and Pashtun. I have some working proficiency in French, Italian and Russian, and I can swear in German, Polish and Hebrew."

"That's amazing. I feel special when I can order off the Taco Bell menu." I said. "And I bet you speaking French is sexy as hell."

Ranger had refilled my glass of wine and handed it to me. "My accent isn't very good, so I doubt it. But if you have another glass of wine, you might not notice it as much."

He sat down on the sofa next me and I snuggled up against him. "I can't get a handle on where he's staying though. How are we going to go about tracking him?"

"If my contact can get us into Xchange, we'll go in and scope him out. Otherwise, I'll call in some favors and do some deeper digging. Did you use the Rangeman programs?"

I nodded. "He's not paying rent to anyone, so he must be living with a new girl or something."

I turned on the television in time to start watching an _Alias_ rerun. Sydney was running in four-inch heels and a blonde wig after stealing information from an office when a man caught up with her and she had to go into ass-kicking mode.

"Do you wish I were more like Sydney Bristow?" I asked Ranger. "So that you didn't have to constantly come save me?"

"I wish you'd be a little more careful when you are out and keep your gun loaded and on your person at all times. Otherwise, no, I don't want you to be Sydney Bristow. I like Stephanie Plum much better."

I had just moved up to give Ranger a kiss when his cell phone rang.

He looked at the display on the phone. "It's my contact in Chicago. I need to take this. He doesn't like to be ignored."

He answered the call, listening intently and asking questions in Arabic. He hung up a few minutes later.

"My contact confirmed that Velazquez is at the club every day from ten to three, when it closes." Ranger said, putting his phone back on the coffee table. "I'll get us flights out to Chicago for tomorrow and we'll go to the club tomorrow night. We'll follow him to where he is staying and then plan on how to get him out of Illinois. Do you know how his arrest went? Did he put up a big fight? If so, we'll have to charter a flight home."

"One of his charges is resisting arrest, so I think he'll fight us," I replied.

Ranger stood up and pulled me with him. "I need to get a plane arranged then. Even private flights need a little notice."

I groaned. Velazquez's bond was two hundred-thousand dollars, which meant my take was going to be twenty thousand. Chartering a plan was going to be expensive. "That sucks. Maybe we can give him a shot of something so he will cooperate and get on a commercial flight."

We went upstairs to the office, where Ranger turned on his computer. "Airlines expect doctor's notes for such things, which he won't have and I'd rather not risk forging one."

While he ordered our plane tickets, I started researching which states had banned bounty hunting. I hadn't considered that there were states where we couldn't legally apprehend people who had skipped out on bail. A quick internet search told me that Illinois, Michigan and Wisconsin banned bounty hunting and that Indiana required bail enforcement agents to be licensed by the state.

"How the hell are we going to get this guy? Every nearby state either bans bounty hunting entirely or requires a license," I asked Ranger as I closed my computer.

"It's all about knowing the ropes, babe. I have connections with people in every state for situations just like this. I'll get in touch with a guy in Gary, Indiana and have him added to the bond so he can help us make the capture. We just have to lure Velazquez across the state line."

"That sounds difficult."

"We'll have to make him an offer he can't refuse," Ranger replied as he put in his credit card number. "We'll fly out of Philadelphia tomorrow morning and get to Chicago by noon and I've got us a room at the Chicago Four Seasons so that we can get ready to go out. Now I'll just need to get everything set up with the BEA in Indiana and we'll be ready to go."

While Ranger called the necessary people, I went to my room to start packing. I didn't figure we would be gone more than a day, but packed a couple of extra outfits in case we didn't catch him as planned. My dilemma fell more into what to wear to the club where we would scope out Velazquez. I'd never been much into the clubbing scene and given the sideline activities that went on inside Xchange, I had a feeling I was going to stand out no matter what I wore. What I needed was someone with expertise in this area to help me blend in as much as possible.

Lula.

Twenty minutes later, I was pulling up in front of Lula's house. She had told me we needed to go to the mall before they closed, and had been way too excited about picking out clothes for me. I had laid out certain guidelines about what I would wear though—nothing too bright or outlandish. Outlandish included animal prints and outfits that didn't cover my ass or boobs.

"You're no fun," Lula said as she climbed into the Cayenne. "This is going to be a boring ass shopping trip to find you something to wear to a hip-hop club. Besides, you're going to be there with Ranger, who will be looking like the finest man that ever walked the planet, and he's going to walk in with a woman who isn't brave enough to wear zebra-print."

We had two hours until the mall closed, so Lula took me directly to stores that would likely have what I needed. I tried on a variety of dresses and tops that were incredibly tight, incredibly short and showed off quite bit of cleavage, which was saying something on me. It was at the third store where we found a top we could both agree would be good for me. It was dark red with three-quarter length sleeves and a deep v-neck. I also picked up a pair of tight, dark-washed jeans and a pair of sexy black boots.

"You're gonna look hot in this outfit," Lula said as I drove her home. "Ranger may have trouble staying focused on the job at hand with you in that dress."

No shit. I'd be lucky if he didn't rip it off of me before we even left our hotel room to go to the club.

We decided to stop for dessert at a diner on Hamilton Avenue that had several different types of cakes and pies available around the clock. I parked across the street from the diner in front of a three story office building that housed a couple of attorneys, a mental health center and a social services business. There was a crane three car lengths away from us lifting an industrial-sized furnace to the roof the building and men in work uniforms were standing around at the bottom of the building talking and smoking cigarettes. Lula and I found a seat by the window and placed our orders with a waitress that looked old enough to have served pie to the first settlers of Trenton. Lula got cherry pie and I got German chocolate cake.

"You know who I've been missing lately?" Lula asked once the waitress left to get our food. "Tank. I think I might give him a call and see if he wants to get together."

"Do you think he will? After all, you tricked him into getting engaged, caused him to get completely trashed one night and pass out on your bathroom floor, and he did his best to avoid you after that until you broke up with him," I said, remembering the fiasco that had ensued.

"Sure he will. He may not have wanted to get married, but we had some good times in bed. Damn, he was the biggest man I'd ever been with, and I've never quite found anything that good again. I guess you could say he's ruined me for other men. You know what I mean?"

I knew exactly what she meant. I was completely ruined by Ranger. And he damned well knew it too.

Lula and I discussed the possibility of her getting back together with Tank while we ate our food and then moved on to my mission to pick up Velazquez in a state that banned bounty hunting. Yells from the workers outside interrupted our conversation just in time to see the industrial-sized furnace that the crane had been putting on the office building fall onto the front end of my Cayenne.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I yelled, standing up and running outside. "I've only had that car for six months!"

"Sorry, ma'am," said a guy in a uniform who looked like he had just entered puberty.

"Did you just call me 'ma'am'?" I asked, glowering at the kid. "I'm not old enough to be a 'Ma'am' to you, shithead. You just ruined my car—well, technically, my boyfriend's car."

Lula had shown up behind me, holding my cell phone and purse, which I had left in the diner. "Ranger just called and I told him what happened. He said he's on his way, and that he apparently won a bet."

My own boyfriend was now betting on how long I kept my cars? I was going to kick Ranger's ass. I stood there fuming before a police car showed up three minutes later and Robin Russell got out.

"Tough luck, Stephanie," she said as she walked up to the car. "I thought for sure this was your lucky car. I had my money on you having it for at least a year."

I gaped at Robin. "The police department bets on me too?"

Robin nodded. "Yep. Morelli's still in on the bets too, even though he's down in Camden. In fact, I think his bet was close on this one. Marge in dispatch keeps all the bets and money."

I walked over to the back of the car and open the lift gate. My shopping bag was untouched in the back with the clothes I'd bought to wear in Chicago. At least the incident wasn't a total loss.

Ranger pulled up behind the police car a minute or so later. He was wearing a black peat coat over his Rangeman attire. He walked over to me, fighting to keep a smile off his face.

"You bet on how long I'd have this car before it got destroyed?" I asked as he approached.

He put an arm around my waist and kissed my head. "Of course. And I'm glad I did. The money will help cover the insurance deductible."

I elbowed Ranger in the side. "I hate you right now."

That earned me a full-on smile. "I was just kidding, babe. I'll let you have the money as penance for my bad behavior. Will that get me out of the dog house?"

"How much money are we talking about?"

"Three thousand dollars."

"I forgive you."

While Ranger talked to Robin and signed the police report, I saw a familiar SUV pull up behind Ranger's Turbo. It was Morelli.

"I just heard I won a bet," he said smirking. "I was about to head home when Marge called to say I was officially eight hundred bucks richer."

"What are you doing here?" I asked, disgusted that both my current and former boyfriends had bet on me and won.

"Grandma Bella's eighty-fifth birthday was today. We had a family dinner for her, plus I brought my girlfriend up to meet everyone," he replied. I looked back at his SUV and noticed a pretty redhead sitting in the front seat.

"I'm glad you're seeing someone," I said honestly. "But I'm still pissed that you bet on me and won."

Ranger came up next to me with the report from Robin while I was talking to Morelli.

"What's worse is that Ranger bet on me too. He won three grand, but at least he's giving me his earnings."

Morelli snorted. "Of course he is. He wants to keep getting laid. I'd be doing the same thing if I were still in that position with you."

I turned to glare at Ranger. "I thought you were doing so because you felt bad for betting on me?"

Ranger glanced at Morelli before turning his gaze on me. "The thought of not having sex for a while makes me feel bad."

Morelli burst into laughter. "Damn, I'm glad that isn't me anymore. Melissa's never been kidnapped, stalked or had her car destroyed. It's freaking amazing."

"Your loss is my gain," Ranger told Morelli, grabbing my hand. "Steph's pretty damn phenomenal—destroyed cars, stalkers, crazy family and all."

I squeezed Ranger's hand and smiled at him, appreciating the way he stood up for me. Any further debates about whether I was worth dating were interrupted by Lula's reappearance. She had gone back in the diner to keep warm while watching the circus surrounding my car.

"How much longer are we going to be here? I'm missing some good television shows," she asked, pulling her coat around her. "Unless you plan to tell Morelli about what you two did with the icing from that housewarming cake he brought you a while back. That would be worth hanging around to watch."

Morelli's mouth dropped open in shock. I blushed slightly, remembering how sexy that night had been, and Ranger had a small, smug smile on his face. Morelli looked at me as if to ask me for confirmation.

I shrugged at Morelli as we walked back to the Turbo. "Like he said, it's your loss."


	21. In da club

_A/N: I love my readers/reviewers. You're terrific! Here's another chapter as penance for taking a month between postings. _

Tank drove us to the Philadelphia airport the next morning and our plane landed in Chicago shortly after noon, though it was only eleven in Chicago. Ranger had informed me on the flight that his contact in Indiana, a man named Pete Williams, would be meeting us at the hotel in Chicago before we had to go to the club. We would finalize plans of how to get Velazquez across the state line of his own volition so that Williams could help us get him on a private plane that would be waiting for us at the airport in Gary. Williams wasn't required to come back to Jersey with us, but had to be the one to make the capture and physically put Velazquez on the plane.

We stopped at a car rental counter and Ranger picked up the car he had ordered, which turned out to be a black Escalade. As we drove through the city to the Four Seasons, I started deducting costs from my recovery fee to figure out how much I would get in the end.

"How much is the plane costing? And how much will I owe Williams for helping us?" I asked Ranger. "And the cost for the hotel and the car?"

"Babe, I've got it covered. You don't need to pay for that stuff," Ranger replied.

I shook my head. "No way. You're helping me learn how to bring in someone from out-of-state. I expect to be paying for it all. He's a high enough bond to cover the expenses."

Ranger stopped at a light and turned to look at me. "I've already paid for the plane, not to mention I've already booked the car and hotel in my name and on my credit card. I don't want you to be out your entire fee."

I crossed my arms in front of me and put my determined face on. "I don't want you wasting your money on my skip."

"It's not a waste, Stephanie. I'm teaching you how to do something that I normally have to do. This trip serves two purposes: it helps you earn more money in the long-term, and saves me time that I have to take away from my business. I won't take your money, and Williams is only asking for twenty percent of the recovery. You can send him a check once you get your check from Connie."

"I still don't feel right about you paying for the big stuff."

"We've got all afternoon to ourselves in a five-star hotel," Ranger replied. "You'll think of some other way to repay me."

We arrived at our room at the Four Seasons half an hour later, which was on the fortieth floor and had a spectacular view of Lake Michigan. I took in the scenery for a few minutes while Ranger talked to the Syrian to ensure we could still get into the club and then with Williams about meeting that evening.

"My contact says he can get us into Xchange tonight," Ranger told me after he disconnected. "He didn't have enough time to get us on the VIP list to come and go as we please, so he will have to meet us there and we'll go in with him. He's in the illegal arms business, so no one will question him bringing someone with him."

Lovely. I was all for fibbing a little to get an FTA, but partying with an arms dealer was a little out of my comfort zone. On the other hand, Ranger knew him and trusted him enough to be around me. Or at least trusted himself enough to know he could take out the guy if he tried anything.

"We'll meet Williams in the bar downstairs at seven-thirty to get our plan finalized," Ranger continued. "We'll be meeting my contact a couple of blocks away from Xchange at nine so we can arrive at the club together. We just need him to get us in the door, and then we can do our thing."

I nodded. "Sounds like a plan, though hanging out with your contact makes me a little nervous."

Ranger chuckled and pulled me into a hug. "As long as you don't try to compete with him in the arms trade, I don't think you'll have a problem. I may have to remind him that you're mine because he'll be trying to get you into bed if he spends too much time around you."

"Speaking of which…," I said, as I started kissing Ranger along the neck. I reached down between us to unzip his pants as I pushed him towards the bed, trying to decide the best way to repay him for his generosity.

"Wake up, babe. It's six o'clock."

I opened my eyes to find Ranger leaning over me. He gave me a quick kiss and climbed out of bed, where we had been the entire afternoon. I climbed out of bed after him, walking a little awkwardly towards the bathroom. I heard Ranger chuckle behind me.

"Are you going to be able to walk tonight?" he asked as he unpacked his clothes.

"Ask me again after I've had a hot shower," I replied, grabbing my bag and taking it into the marble bathroom with me. "We haven't had that much sex in a while. I'm a little of practice."

Ranger followed me into the bathroom. "I'm trying to make up for lost time."

I took a fast shower, dried off, put on my underwear and grabbed the hair dryer while Ranger brushed his teeth and got dressed in jeans and a tight black t-shirt. I noticed him watching me in the mirror as I stood in my black lace bra and matching panties drying my hair.

"Don't even think about it," I yelled over the noise of the dryer. He winked at me and walked back into the bedroom, leaving me to finish getting ready without worry that I'd get jumped.

Fifteen minutes later, I walked out of the bathroom with my make-up and hair in semi-slut mode, dressed in the tight shirt and jeans with bottom of my jeans tucked into the black boots that came to mid-calf.

Ranger was checking the ammo clip in his Glock and looked up at me, his eyes lighting up. "Seriously, babe? You tell me not to think about sex, and then you wear something like that…"

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Consider it an exercise in self-control."

"The fact that I didn't have dick inside you every time we saw each other in the five years prior to becoming a couple is evidence of my ability to control myself," Ranger said as he walked over to me to take my bag.

I smacked him on the butt as he walked past, which made him flinch sharply. He stood still for a second before continuing over to the entryway to our room and setting our bags by the door. Since he had come back from Somalia, the few times in bed when I had started to move my hands down his body to grab his butt he had either shifted our positions or done something that had kept me from reaching him, so I had stopped by trying. I suddenly felt horrible, realizing that while he may not be showing as many outwardly obvious signs of the trauma he had experienced, he was still suffering some of the trauma internally.

"Sorry," I said quietly.

Ranger put a finger to my lips. "Don't apologize. I like your hands on my ass. It was just a little overreaction on my part."

I kissed his finger. "Are we ready to go to dinner? I'm starving," I said, changing the subject.

"Yes, let's go," he replied, grabbing my hand leading out of the room and to the elevator. I suspected he was as glad of the change of subject as I was.

The restaurant at the Four Seasons was casual, so I didn't feel too out of place as Ranger and I walked through to a table. We were seated at a table with a view of the door so that Ranger could watch for Williams as seven-thirty rolled around. I ordered Spaghetti Carbonara while Ranger ordered something that sounded like a fancy salad. I also added piece of cake to my order for dessert. Naturally, I was the only one at the table having dessert.

"Your 'no dessert' habit is one reason I had worried about whether a relationship between us would work out," I told Ranger after the waiter left our table. "Dessert is a main part of my diet."

A small smile played on Ranger's lips. "There's only one dessert I'm interested in eating, babe, and I had quite bit of it earlier today."

I flushed slightly at the memory and fanned myself with my napkin. Ranger had certainly enjoyed his dessert. He'd even gone back for seconds. And thirds.

"Most men don't like eating that particular type of dessert as much as you do," I commented, taking a sip of water.

"It's not something I've indulged in with every woman I've ever been with," Ranger replied. "I consider it the most intimate thing I can do to a woman on a physical level. And with you, it is especially good."

I was speechless for a moment after that. Ranger had somehow made that comment both dirty and incredibly romantic at the same time. And it made me feel good that he attached more meaning to it than just sexual gratification.

Before I could recover, the waiter had brought our meals out to us, thus ending conversation. The meal was delicious, which I should expect for how much it was costing. The red velvet cake I had ordered was the best I'd ever tasted and I was nearly moaning when I took the first bite. I had just finished my cake when Ranger caught the eye of a man walking into the restaurant.

"There's Williams," he said, nodding to the man.

Williams was in his mid-fifties with light brown hair cut very short. He was about Ranger's height, but probably had thirty pounds on him.

"Hey Ranger," Williams said, extending his hand. Ranger shook it and returned the greeting.

"Williams. Thanks for your help. This is my girlfriend, Stephanie Plum. It's her skip we're after."

Williams shook my hand and took a seat at our table. "Nice to meet you, Stephanie. I got the copy of the bond agreement and read up on this guy. He sounds like a real winner."

"He is," I replied. "It was hard to choose between dating him or Ranger, but Ranger has a better car."

Ranger and Williams had already discussed some of the plan, but didn't have the details nailed down. It ultimately came down that Ranger was going to pretend to work for someone who was interested in a regular supplier of large amounts of cocaine. They would ask Velazquez to meet them at the Illiana Yacht Club just over the state line into Indiana so that Williams can arrest him and we could head to Gary to get out of the state and back to Jersey.

"My contact here says Z isn't very happy with the job Velazquez is doing and that if he doesn't get his numbers up, he's going to be getting dumped in the river. I think an offer like this is the best hope we have of getting him across the state line," Ranger said.

"What if he doesn't take the bait?" I ask, trying not to sound like a total party-pooper. "What is our plan if he's not interested in a new job or gets suspicious?"

"You could seduce him," Williams suggested. "I think he'd be all over you in that outfit."

I raised an eyebrow in Ranger's direction. "Your thoughts?"

Ranger shrugged. "How bad do you want your guy, babe?"

"Bad," I told him. "I want my money, not to mention Vinnie's been all over me about this one. So that's an option unless he's got a girlfriend. I'm not getting into a cat-fight. But I feel like we need more contingencies."

"If those two plans don't work, we'll have to get dirty," Ranger said. "I have some people I can call, but I don't want to push that button unless I have no choice. Regardless, we have our rendezvous point in Indiana and a plane on standby in Gary. We will be getting him back to Trenton by morning."

We checked out of the hotel at eight-thirty and drove to a bar about twenty-minutes away. Ranger parked on the street across from the bar and flashed his headlights. A man standing outside in jeans and a grey wool jacket crossed the street and opened the back door.

"Jamal," Ranger said, looking in the rearview mirror. Jamal was about my age, shorter than Ranger and wiry.

"Ranger," Jamal replied, his gaze falling on me. "You brought your woman with you?"

"It's her job. I'm just helping out," Ranger replied, pulling away from the curb. "Tell us about what you know of Velazquez."

"He gets to the club by ten and spends the first hour or two drinking and dancing. By midnight is when his business gets going and he deals with regulars who come to a private booth he has up along the balcony. The club closes at three, so he generally leaves by two-thirty. There's a back door where we dealers come and go. I can show you the back door and get you in that way, since you are with me," Jamal said, watching out the window as he spoke.

We arrived at the club a few minutes later, with Jamal instructing Ranger to park in a garage around the block. The garage was secured, meaning men with guns were checking who was showing up and letting them park there or not. We were granted access and parked amongst other oversized SUVs and expensive sports cars. We followed Jamal out of the garage and to an unassuming grey door. There was another heavily armed bouncer standing guard. Jamal nodded to the man who opened the door, letting us all walk in. Ranger was calm and collected, holding my hand and appearing as though he did this every day. I tried to play it cool, but inside I was feeling jittery. As we walked through the back of the club, we were met with the smell of cigarette smoke, booze, sweat and the loud thumping of a bass. There was a VIP coat check by the back entrance, but I had thankfully decided to leave my coat in the car.

I saw Ranger pull an envelope out of his pocket and hand it to Jamal. Jamal nodded to us and walked away, headed up a spiral staircase towards the balcony, which showed several booths along each wall with heavy red velvet curtains that were pulled closed on a few of the booths, but left open on others.

"What do we do now? This place is chaotic. Even if Velazquez arrives as planned, it'll be almost impossible to find him," I asked Ranger, having to get right up to his ear and yell in order to be heard over the noise.

"We will just strike when opportunity presents itself. If we can't get him down here, then we'll wait until he goes up to his booth at twelve," Ranger replied as we walked around the edge of the dance floor. Women were shaking their asses and men were grinding up against them with varying levels of skill. Some had no rhythm while others were perfectly in sync with the music and one another.

Ranger went up to the bar and placed drink orders that I couldn't hear over the music and voices. The bartender gave me a strange look and said something to Ranger, who responded with a small smile and nodding his head towards me. The bartender gave an understanding nod, said something which made Ranger chuckle and walked off. He returned a couple of minutes later with two drinks.

Ranger took the drink that looked like vodka rocks and handed me the other drink.

"Sex on the beach?" I asked, noticing the color.

"Almost. You have no alcohol tolerance. I told the bartender you were pregnant. He recommended Safe Sex on the Beach, in an ironic nod to the fact that we must not have practiced safe sex," Ranger replied, smiling at my horrified reaction.

"Why did you say I was pregnant?"

"Clubs don't like people ordering virgin drinks and get testy when they lose out on that money. You being pregnant was the best excuse. He was less likely to argue with me on it than if I had said you were an alcoholic or the designated driver."

I made the sign of the cross discretely. "If I end up pregnant after this afternoon's activities, we'll know God didn't find your lie funny either." Ranger smiled and sipped his drink, wisely saying nothing else.

We scanned the dance floor and bar while we sipped our drinks, but there was no sign of Velazquez.

"Let's dance," Ranger said, pulling me out on the dance floor. "We'll be able to scan the crowd better."

I followed him, weaving through people until we were close to the middle of the crowd. Ranger stopped and turned around, pulling me close to him. He gave me a brief kiss as he put his hands on my waist and started to move his hips in perfect time to the music. I started feeling a little nervous as I realized he was going to be a spectacular dancer.

"This may not be the time to mention this, but I'm not a very good dancer," I said, my lips brushing against Ranger's ear as I spoke.

"I am," he replied, his voice sexy and low even though he was trying to be heard above the roar. "Just move with me."

He pulled me closer and I let my hips move like his, running my hands up his arms and around his neck. Ranger placed the occasional soft kiss along my cheekbones and jawline. I knew his eyes were scanning the room, looking for Velazquez and that I should be doing the same thing, but I couldn't focus enough to remember what he even looked like. It was intoxicating to be doing something so sexy and normal with him. I could almost forget that we were working.

"I see him," Ranger said after we'd been dancing for about twenty minutes. "Turn around and look."

I turned my back to Ranger, but kept moving. "Your two o'clock," he told me.

I looked to the right and spotted Velazquez dancing with a drink his hand while two girls were grinding against him, one behind him and one in front. The girl in front was practically touching the floor, rubbing her ass all over his groin. It made any guilt I may have felt over lying to his girlfriend back in Trenton disappear. She was clearly better off without him.

He danced like that for another half hour before dismissing the girls and heading towards the bar.

"Here's our chance," Ranger said, grabbing my hand and pulling me after him.

When we got in sight of Velazquez, who looked to be ordering another whiskey, Ranger walked up to stand next to him at the bar. He said something that caught Velazquez's attention. He nodded and Ranger said something else that made Velazquez's eyebrows shoot up into his brow. I strained to hear what Ranger was saying, but it was impossible given the noise and his soft voice. Velazquez looked my way and gave me the once over before saying something to Ranger, who nodded and handed him a card before stepping away from the bar, pulling me with him.

We walked towards the back of the bar and out the back door, where the men with guns continued to stand guard. I immediately felt apprehensive, but Ranger continued his stride as though nothing were different. His only change was to let go of my hand and put his arm around my shoulders.

"Wait until we are in the car," he whispered into my ear after he placed a soft kiss in my hair. I nodded and smiled sweetly at him, giving the impression to outsiders that we were headed to a hotel room for the night.

Ranger started to speak once we were safely in the Escalade and had pulled out of the garage.

"I told Velazquez the story about working for a man who is looking for a new cocaine supplier. He is very interested, and he has agreed to meet us at the Illiana Yacht Club at three. That will give us enough time to get set up with Williams. The card I gave him has a GPS tracker inside of it, so as long as he keeps it, we'll know where he is. It's risky, but I had no other way of planting one on him without being obvious or having you grope him."

"That worked out really well," I told Ranger. "Almost too well. Do you think we'll have any problems?"

Ranger shook his head. "I don't think so. He's pretty desperate. I told him I had heard his boss was losing patience with him, so I think self-preservation will kick in and he'll show."

"I guess I'm just used to things going to shit when I do them, so I'm always surprised when they work out," I told Ranger.

"This one is abnormal," Ranger responded. "Normally I track an out-of-state FTA the way I do any other and bring them in quickly. Velazquez is a different case, but you've done great."

"I haven't done much," I told him. "You've had the contacts and the ideas. I just wore tight clothes, shook my ass a little and put my name on the bond agreement."

Ranger smiled and patted my leg. "And you looked great doing it, babe."

I rolled my eyes as we parked along a curb on the next block so that we could follow Velazquez to see where he went when he left the club. Ranger made it look easy to bring in these out-of-state skips, and I suspected he was doing things a little more legitimately with me than he would have had he been on his own. But I was grateful nonetheless—not just for the help he was giving me and the ridiculous amount of money he was investing in my newest training venture. I was grateful for the faith he was putting in me, trying to show me that I could do this on my own.

We had been watching the alley until a little after one o'clock when we saw Velazquez walk out, dressed in a black trench coat. He walked into the garage and within five minutes was pulling down the alley in a white Ford Explorer. When he turned onto the road on which we were parked, Ranger started following at a distance. Since Velazquez wasn't due to meet us for nearly two hours, we figured he was planning to stop by wherever he was staying before coming out to the yacht club. We followed him south through the city into one of Chicago's more impoverished neighborhoods. Velazquez stopped in front of one of the better-looking battered brick apartment buildings in the neighborhood and got out of his car. Ranger drove past Velazquez and parked half a block down the street so that we could watch him in the mirrors.

We watched as Velazquez went inside the building, where he stayed for twenty minutes until he walked out again, followed by a man about his age and build. The man was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. He was yelling at Velazquez, so I cracked my window slightly to be able to hear what he was saying.

"I blow you and this is what you do, huh? You just walk away because you need to score some big job? Fuck you, Joaquin. I thought we had something, but you're just another asshole on the down low. You'll go back to bangin' bitches and pretend this never happened," the man yelled, his voice echoing around the empty neighborhood.

Velazquez ignored the man, got into his SUV and pulled away without a glance back. Ranger waited until the Explorer had turned the corner before he started to follow it.

"That was unexpected," I commented after a few blocks. "I definitely don't feel bad for coming in between him and his girl back in Trenton."

"Do you not want him to be an active part of the imaginary twins' lives?" Ranger asked, smirking.

I snorted. "Not even for imaginary twins, though it would have nothing to do with him liking to have sex with men and everything to do with him being a sleaze bag in general."

We didn't speak anymore as we followed Velazquez through the city, where he wound around and went back to Lakeshore Drive. He pulled up to an underground garage near a high-rise building, typed in a code and was granted access. Ranger drove passed the garage and headed towards the interstate.

"We'll head to the yacht club," Ranger said. "Tank is watching the GPS and will update us when he moves again."

It took us half an hour to get to the Illiana Yacht Club, which was on a large lake just across the state line into Indiana. Tank called as we were pulling into the parking lot to say that Velazquez was driving in the direction of the club and was likely twenty minutes out. The lot was empty at two-thirty in the morning, with the exception of a dark blue Jeep. Ranger pulled up alongside it and rolled down his window. Williams did the same.

"He made a couple of stops in the city, but he's headed this way. ETA is twenty minutes," Ranger said. "How far is it to the airport from here?"

"Fifteen minutes or so," Williams replied.

We waited in silence for the next fifteen minutes until we saw headlights turn into the parking lot. It was Velazquez's Explorer. He pulled up behind the Escalade and turned his car off.

"He's alone," Ranger said, unbuckling his seat belt. "Stay here, Steph."

I made to argue that it was my skip, but Ranger shut the door before I could get anything out. Williams had also gotten out of his car and both men walked towards the Explorer. Velazquez stepped out of the SUV with a black messenger bag on his shoulder. Once he had shut his door, Williams announced that he was bond enforcement and that Velazquez was in violation of his bail. Velazquez, realizing he was screwed had turned to run, but Ranger had him by the back of coat and lying on the ground before he could take a step. I got out of the car and watched as Velazquez was handcuffed.

"You brought your bitch to watch me get arrested?" Velazquez asked once he saw me. "This your idea of a date?"

"She's the bond enforcement agent who will be taking you back to Trenton," Williams said, pulling Velazquez up to his feet. "I'm just getting you on the plane."

Overall, the tracking and takedown of Joaquin Velazquez had gone perfectly. With Ranger leading the whole thing, there wasn't a single explosion or bullet fired. I didn't fall into something disgusting or get any of the hair on my body singed off. On an even better note, I was only going to be out the four thousand I owed to Williams for his part, rather than the nearly twelve thousand that it would have cost had Ranger not insisted on paying for the plane, hotel and car costs.

Of course, some things in life are constant. Water is wet, fire is hot, Ranger is sexy, and Stephanie will have to roll around on the ground with a half-naked FTA.

On the two and a half hour plane ride from Chicago to Trenton, I had to listen to Joaquin Velazquez sexually harass me the entire time. He commented on every part of my body at least once, talked about my clothes and how much better they'd look on the floor, offered to perform a variety of sexual acts on me and asked me to reciprocate. I could ignore some, but others got my Italian temper up and I would saying something shitty. Ranger was able to block it out and kept trying to keep me calm, but when Velazquez started developing a major boner and was working to get it out of his pants on the plane, Ranger's self-control failed and he informed Velazquez that if his dick came out of his pants, it would be cut off. To stress the point, Ranger pulled his knife out of his pocket and left it sitting on the seat next to him. Suffice it to say, Velazquez kept his pants on.

When we finally arrived at the Trenton airport, there were was a Rangeman SUV waiting for us with a man I didn't know as well behind the wheel. Ranger walked out of the plane first to be able to wait on Velazquez at the bottom, just in case he decided to try to make a run for it. I had a hold of Velazquez's arm as we walked down the steps from the small plane. I wasn't exactly sure how it happened, but Velazquez's pants suddenly fell down around his ankles as we walked, causing him to trip and bring me tumbling down the steps with him. Ranger had tried to brace us as we fell to the bottom, but ended up getting bowled over. When we finally stopped, Velazquez was underneath me, his boxers ripped and his Johnson rubbing up against me. Ranger was lying on the ground next to us, catching his breath. Once Velazquez realized the position we were in, he started grinding himself up against me, causing me to shriek and jump up off of him. Ranger grabbed Velazquez by the collar and stood him up, instructing him to put his pants back on. Velazquez fumbled with pulling up his jeans and buttoning them before being shoved into the back seat of the SUV.

"Sit in the front with Luis," Ranger told me, climbing in back with Velazquez. The ride from the airport to the jail took about fifteen minutes in which time Velazquez was completely silent. I suspected Ranger had his gun trained on Velazquez, but I didn't look back to find out. I got my body receipt for Velazquez and headed back out to the SUV, ready to go home and fall asleep wherever I fell. Round trip flying from Trenton to Chicago, marathon sex and a tumble down the stairs of an airplane in less than twenty-four hours had worn me out. Ranger looked as tired as I felt as he unlocked the door ten minutes later and turned off the alarm. He dropped his bag by the front door and walked over the couch, falling back on to it and swearing as he did so.

"This couch is awful, babe."

I walked over to the couch, taking off my boots and nudging Ranger over so that I could lay down next to him. "I know it is. We really should buy a new one. Maybe we can go do that tomorrow. Or today. Or yesterday? Hell, I don't even know what day it is. I think I'm jetlagged."

"We only flew over one time zone for less than a day. I don't think you get jetlagged from that," Ranger mumbled sleepily.

We both squirmed on the couch, trying to get comfortable but failing due to the fact that the couch had hard ridges and we were two adults trying to sleep on a couch that one adult could barely sleep on.

"Why don't we go up to bed?" Ranger asked after fifteen minutes of repositioning.

"Because I don't have the energy to walk up the stairs," I replied, my voice muffled by the fact that my face was buried into his chest. "You could carry me if you really want to go up to bed."

"Not a chance," Ranger said, kissing my head. "Let's just sleep here. Maybe we'll feel like going upstairs later."

I fought off a smile as I fell asleep. My laziness was starting to rub off on Ranger. I just hoped my diet was next.


End file.
